Repost from old blog, 1/23/2009The GF
…exists, so you must be DL
…doesn’t go down anyway
…(it’d be cool if you had one)
…just left me for some dude
…broke up with me 5 months ago
…has been cheating on me with my best friend
…is leaving for a week on family vacation
…left me hard
…is away, plus she can’t suck well anyway
…is not cutting it
…works third shift so I’m S.O.L.
…is coming home soon, so hurry!
…got fucked for 2 hours this morning…BUT…
…wants to get married?
… — I love licking her pussy, so…
Jan 24, 2009 @ 13:39:00
Jan 24, 2009 @ 13:43:00
Pure poetry, David.
Feb 20, 2010 @ 05:31:49
You’re right of course that it’s best to let these ads just speak for themselves. And their cocks.
But I can’t help pointing out that it seems as if these advertisers have been reading those Straight To Hell comics from the 1970s. Not that I’m complaining.
My favourite line of all is: ‘Love licking my girlfriend’s pussy, so I’d also like to try licking your cock and asshole.’ It’s the kind of hilarious but when you think about it actually very plausible very wise line that I suspect could only be ‘100% gen’.
Feb 20, 2010 @ 07:48:42
I’m glad you enjoy these because it’s inspiring me to do another, even though they’re a total pain in the ass to construct.
I love Craigslist ads because it’s all about the promise and the fantasy. Those stories in Straight to Hell are the like the warts-and-all aftermath (which I also enjoy, just in a different way).
The most boner-ific ad here for me is the guy whose girlfriend was cheating on him with his best friend: “I’m not looking for a relationship (which is why I’m not looking for a chick).” And I have a special place in my heart for the man who purports that his girlfriend is gone and wants another guy to come over to just cuddle with him and kiss, no sex. It’s poignant.