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  1. Anonymous
    Oct 18, 2006 @ 21:03:00

    Yep, it’s okay! In fact, it’s nigh impossible to stop looking at it and fantasizing. Very hot. (And your blog is fascinating. A genuinely interesting mind.)

    Reply

  2. Bacteriaburger
    Oct 19, 2006 @ 06:09:00

    My first comment! Thanks, buddy.

    Reply

  3. rowdybruno
    Oct 23, 2006 @ 18:53:00

    Hey bacteriaburger,

    Aw–I missed my chance to be the very first one to comment on your blog. Oh well.

    You rock! Your stories are so great–and I read *lots* of stories online. Something about yours…

    Reply

  4. jlosey
    Oct 23, 2006 @ 20:25:00

    I agree with rowdybruno about your stories! I, too, read lots of stories, and there’s definitely something about yours! Keep ’em coming.

    Reply

  5. Bacteriaburger
    Oct 24, 2006 @ 13:39:00

    Thanks guys! (Mike, haven’t heard from ya in a while!)

    Reply

  6. eltizzle
    Oct 25, 2006 @ 13:45:00

    I just read your entire blog… interesting. i have a similar situation, with respect to not being responded to. anyway, cheers from iraq

    Reply

  7. Bacteriaburger
    Oct 26, 2006 @ 06:05:00

    Good luck out there, buddy. My heart goes out to you. And thanks for reading.

    Reply

  8. jlosey
    Nov 03, 2006 @ 22:30:00

    Maybe so, but your own porn is a great deal more than this. You create stories that have an intensity and immediacy that is palpable and intimately involving, and that’s different from the sentiment expressed here. I’d agree that the original quote applies to a lot of what gets out there, but some writers — you’re notable among them — go into a different world. Good porn — like any good fiction — creates a world, even if for only a moment. I look forward to more of yours!

    Reply

  9. buff
    Nov 06, 2006 @ 06:25:00

    WOW, yes fantasy is the spice of life. Really appreciate how you reflected on Mike Jones and the disgraced Rev.

    And Mike is a hottie. Thanks for sharing.

    Reply

  10. jlosey
    Nov 07, 2006 @ 10:37:00

    Re the Haggard scandal, your comments are right on! You’ve seen a side of this that no one has even noted on even the gay boards.

    Reply

  11. Bernard Welt
    Nov 25, 2006 @ 08:30:00

    I found your blog through Dennis Cooper’s and I like it. Do you always publish your porn under the same name? What is it? I’d like to see some.

    Reply

  12. Bacteriaburger
    Nov 25, 2006 @ 23:55:00

    Bernard, Thanks for the nice compliment! I usually publish under the name “bacteriaburger,” and you can find my stories here: http://www.bacteriaburger.com

    Hope you dig it. Take care.

    Reply

  13. winter rates
    Nov 30, 2006 @ 19:24:00

    that reminds me of this book “A boys Sex Life” my mom gave me when I was like 13. It was written by a local priest, which freaked me out, and it had all of these scenes of boys confessing how much they jerked-off to priests…I totally upped my whack off quotient afterwards cos these kids were horn dogs…

    Reply

  14. Bacteriaburger
    Dec 01, 2006 @ 12:43:00

    That sounds awesome! My biggest “unintentional porn” turn-on came from a Boy Scouts-produced film called “A Time to Tell,” which aired on public television once and blew my mind. I found a copy on the internet and as soon as I see it again I’ll be writing about it.

    Reply

  15. David
    Dec 01, 2006 @ 23:53:00

    I love the look on his (I assume) older daughter’s face! Her expression says it all, “I hate this family.” LOL

    Reply

  16. Mizu
    Dec 04, 2006 @ 14:52:00

    I love this album. It’s an eternal favorite of mine.

    Reply

  17. Anonymous
    Dec 05, 2006 @ 07:58:00

    Man keep up the writing! You have a very natural way of telling a story and you possess a unique ability to take the message from you to others in the story, then out to the reader and back to to your perspective…very circular! This gives your writing depth and a feeling a completeness. You could easily have your own segments on NPR like David Sedaris. Good Luck and Thanks for doing what you do.

    Reply

  18. David Saรค Viccenzo
    Dec 05, 2006 @ 08:26:00

    I really adore this post, believe me!!

    Reply

  19. Scott
    Dec 06, 2006 @ 09:56:00

    Place a photograph of yourself next to the tip jar! People will be more likely to pay for the services of a CUTE REDHEAD.

    Reply

  20. Bacteriaburger
    Dec 06, 2006 @ 12:45:00

    Who’s a cute redhead? ๐Ÿ˜‰

    Reply

  21. Scott
    Dec 06, 2006 @ 14:37:00

    Umm, Eric Stoltz is I guess. I can’t think of anyone else.

    [breathe in breathe out]

    Now WAIT! How about that bacteria dude? He’s kinda hot. :

    Reply

  22. dwight
    Dec 11, 2006 @ 06:12:00

    Yes! That Hot Times in Little Havana is so damn hot! Man, would I want to have the two cops help me make a sandwich!

    Reply

  23. dwight
    Dec 11, 2006 @ 06:17:00

    Love this! I’ve never had an incest fantasy involving me and members of my family, but I would love to get it on with a couple of of age family members … father/son, brothers, uncle/nephew, cousins … damn, now I’ll be thinking of this all day at work! ๐Ÿ˜‰

    Reply

  24. Anonymous
    Dec 18, 2006 @ 14:05:00

    The other scene of Big Guns which is the one with Henson, Quinn, and Rocky Armano is quite hot.

    Reply

  25. crake23@yahoo.com
    Dec 29, 2006 @ 23:19:00

    AAAAAH!! Cheer the fuck up, Mr. Layne! I hope your New Year is a great one. Oh, and here’s some of my favorite poetry:

    “i want the scissors to be sharp
    and the table to be perfectly level
    when you cut me out of my life
    and paste me in that book you always carry”
    –Billy Collins

    Happy Holidays!

    –j.

    Reply

  26. Bacteriaburger
    Dec 30, 2006 @ 14:01:00

    Nice passage!

    Happy fuckin holidays!!

    Reply

  27. Anonymous
    Jan 13, 2007 @ 12:58:00

    I love # 3 also. the lighting and the situation was perfect. a lot of fantasies was fullfilled when lucas did that scene. i have not seen the rest though. will look out for them though

    Reply

  28. jlosey
    Jan 26, 2007 @ 12:00:00

    I can definitely understand your sensitivity about using your real name. But you’ve gone a long way in ‘coming out’ that way too! Moreover, your stories are terrific, so no need for shame there. Self-consciousness in this mixed world we all live in, of course, that’s hard to escape. But definitely not shame. In fact, with your talent it should be all pride!

    Reply

  29. crake23@yahoo.com
    Jan 26, 2007 @ 21:55:00

    I’m something like pleased to hear that I wasn’t the only one put into a state of shock by this movie– I even took my Mom with me to see it, and I still haven’t asked her what she thought about it, though she’s told me a few times that Michael Caine’s character reminded her of my Dad. I tend to avoid films depicting realistic combat scenarios, as that kinda shit causes flashbacks. Thanks for sharing your perspective, seรฑor. –j.

    Reply

  30. crake23@yahoo.com
    Jan 26, 2007 @ 21:58:00

    Hey, at least you’re not admitting to watching The O.C…. there may be some humanity left in you, yet.

    –j.

    Reply

  31. Bacteriaburger
    Jan 27, 2007 @ 05:37:00

    No, I’ve never watched “The O.C.,” but I am a big “Laguna Beach” fan so draw your own conclusions… ๐Ÿ™‚

    Reply

  32. jlosey
    Jan 27, 2007 @ 19:19:00

    A P.S. to my previous comment: I think I agree with your caveats about “bacteriaburger.” I’ve known it a long time now, and I know how good your stories are. But others not familiar with your work may be put off by this off-beat ‘name.’ On the one hand, you should use whatever name you like, but on the other, I’d hate for any potential readers to miss your work because of a name that really doesn’t suggest you or its quality. Obviously just musing on my part. Whatever name you use, I know I’m going to enjoy what you have to say.

    Reply

  33. Dwight
    Feb 14, 2007 @ 14:24:00

    Maybe you can call it BacteriaBurgher to show your Pittsburgh pride. ๐Ÿ˜‰

    Reply

  34. THE FULL MONTY
    Feb 15, 2007 @ 11:01:00

    Does Brock look familiar to you? well if you were a 90’s kid you would recognize him as Jason, the red ranger, from The Mighty Morphin Power Rangers. Just some random trivia.

    Reply

  35. Bacteriaburger
    Feb 15, 2007 @ 12:20:00

    ha! I’ve heard this before, and I even saw a side-by-side photo comparison, but I’m not convinced that it was him – though they do look alike.

    Reply

  36. David
    Feb 17, 2007 @ 00:51:00

    Well said.

    Reply

  37. jlosey
    Feb 18, 2007 @ 13:56:00

    I’d suggest ActiveDuty.com. It’s related if not quite the same as the ones you’re discussing. The live nightly scenes can be anything from a solo to a group, though solo is likelier these days. The videos for sale on the site feature many of the online guys plus others. They are principally military dudes, although not all are on active duty now. There was a huge scandal about a year ago when the Army busted five guys, followed by court-martials, discharges and the like. Still, those videos have a unique kind of reality and intensity. Most of the dudes will claim to be straight, but on the whole they stay away from making that an issue. These vids are nothing like the usual professional stuff, and that’s a big turn-on all by itself. Most of these guys suck dick and top and bottom with such enthusiasm, who cares whether they ‘think’ they’re str8 or not?!

    Reply

  38. Bacteriaburger
    Feb 19, 2007 @ 15:45:00

    jlosey – I checked out some of the stuff on ActiveDuty when all that scandal was coming down – I think the only video I watched was with Cole. He was hot, but the sex was really raw and turned me off. Interesting. I need to check it out more often.

    Reply

  39. Anonymous
    Feb 22, 2007 @ 07:29:00

    wow natty, is that your photo? ive read your stories for years and id love to think that crazy dirty mind is lurking inside that adorable boy next door exterior…

    Reply

  40. Anonymous
    Feb 24, 2007 @ 19:05:00

    Performance by Will Higs takes some beating!!!!!!!!!!!!
    James Dean

    Reply

  41. Anonymous
    Feb 25, 2007 @ 17:55:00

    The “music” here reminds me of The Teaches of Peaches. That’s all.

    –j.

    Reply

  42. David
    Mar 19, 2007 @ 05:27:00

    There’s no way I would have settled for dvd’s after my work was stolen lol. Just my opinion.

  43. Bacteriaburger
    Mar 19, 2007 @ 07:12:00

    Well I did speak with a lawyer, and since my work wasn’t copyrighted with the Library of Congress, there wasn’t much I could get out of it. I’m getting recognition for it and I’m getting compensation that equals anything I would have gotten out of the story anyway – it was a piece of fan fiction, I never would have been able to sell it. So as far as I’m concerned, I made out pretty good.

  44. jlosey
    Mar 19, 2007 @ 13:44:00

    Must have been an uncanny experience watching this hot scene unfold and gradually realizing that it’s YOURS! For all the odd and even unnerving aspects of this experience, I’d say it was positive. Your work has now had exposure that may lead to future films — all the better when one considers how problematic it can be to try to break out of the pack of wannabes. And, as you said, it drove home the fact that you’ve been selling yourself short! Sometimes you’re almost suspicious of readers who like your work and say so, so now you have to believe that you really are as good as anyone writing erotic fiction today. Sure, there are some readers who simply want a different kind of story to start with, but barring that disposition, it’s hard for me to imagine anyone not being truly turned on and genuinely involved by yours. You know, part of what makes your stories so good (as well as so hot!) is that you really do create a sense of actual characters who are having these experiences, and then you make the experiences so real and hot, one wants to be right there in the middle of it all. At least I do! Well, enough from me. Good luck on future videos!

  45. Anonymous
    Mar 21, 2007 @ 12:05:00

    The theft of your work is bad, but the story itself is really hot. It was my favourite part of the film. Congratulations on making it on screen, and I hope you get the recognition you deserve (not to mention the full set of videos)!

  46. David
    Mar 25, 2007 @ 15:13:00

    Is your other work protected, or can people steal that too?

  47. Bacteriaburger
    Mar 25, 2007 @ 20:56:00

    “How to tell a writer from a wannabee: Wannabees obsess about copyright, registering copyright and generally how to protect their work from theft. Real writers concentrate on making their stuff worth stealing.”

    – Lars Eighner

  48. Secret Rapture
    Apr 02, 2007 @ 08:00:00

    My inaugural address at the Great White Throne Judgment of the Dead, after I have raptured out billions! The Secret Rapture soon, by my hand!
    Read My Inaugural Address
    My Site=http://www.angelfire.com/crazy/spaceman
    Your jaw will drop!

    Reply

  49. David
    Apr 15, 2007 @ 13:00:00

    I don’t know if it was supposed to be, but that remix was hilairous.

    Reply

  50. Dwight
    Apr 24, 2007 @ 04:16:00

    Oh yeah, I really got into that scene! Damn hot.

    Reply

  51. crake23@yahoo.com
    May 04, 2007 @ 14:58:00

    nifty’s loaded with stinkers, sure– but without it, i might never’ve been exposed to work such as yours. my tip– find authors that don’t suck & seek them out. otherwise, well… best of luck skimming through so much poo.
    i’m about an inch away from adding some work of my own to nifty. i had an odd epiphany the other day, and i’ve an urge to share it. i can only wonder what will result, if anything.

    –j.

    Reply

  52. Bacteriaburger
    May 04, 2007 @ 19:08:00

    DO IT! I’d love to read whatever you submit – let me know.

    Nifty is a blast, and I’ve always enjoyed posting my own stories. I’ve found a few authors who I enjoy, but I’m more of a hunt-and-peck kinda guy…guess I enjoy the thrill of finding diamonds in the rough.

    Reply

  53. crake23@yahoo.com
    May 04, 2007 @ 21:53:00

    will do, cap’n.

    –j.

    Reply

  54. Anonymous
    May 06, 2007 @ 15:28:00

    haha! Clicked on the same stories, did the same thing you did. But I’ll admit you had more patience than I did. I didnt get to that part of “matches”, the leather loveseat thingie. I do love reading your stuff though.

    Reply

  55. Anonymous
    May 11, 2007 @ 12:50:00

    Hot…the next scene ‘orlando Bloom’ (i think thats his name) is giving Chris a BJ..after Chris cums, he twists Bloom’s neck and breaks it…

    Reply

  56. crake23@yahoo.com
    May 13, 2007 @ 16:03:00

    okay, so i finally got pretty in black, and… i think i like chain gang of love much, much more. i still haven’t heard their first album.
    –j.

    Reply

  57. Bacteriaburger
    May 13, 2007 @ 18:54:00

    Their first album is pretty “eh.” I think some of their best songs are on “Chain Gang of Love,” but “Pretty in Black” is, on the whole, a better album. Different vibe for sure, but the tunes are still there.

    Reply

  58. Dwight
    May 14, 2007 @ 05:46:00

    Oh, the memories … one of the hottest couples on TV … Keller/Beecher. *Drool*

    And I also remember the scene anonymous is tallking about, with Chris Meloni and hottie BRIAN Bloom. Hot turned into disturbing when he broke his neck.

    Reply

  59. Bacteriaburger
    May 14, 2007 @ 09:15:00

    Yeah, OZ had way too many of those hot/disturbing boner inflating/deflating moments… reminiscent of the classic scene in Kubrick’s “The Shining,” where that hot naked woman gets out of the tub, hugs Jack Nicholson, and then he looks in the mirror and she’s an old hag with sores all over her body, thereby fucking with the heads of poor heterosexual boys everywhere. I love that scene.

    Reply

  60. jay
    May 24, 2007 @ 20:35:00

    okay, you were dead-on. i just got in from a road trip, and i probably listened to pretty in black at least three times straight through. it’s friggin’ awesome. the new !!! album got plenty of play, too. thanks for the tip, fucker.

    –j.

    Reply

  61. crake23@yahoo.com
    May 24, 2007 @ 20:39:00

    yay for HTML restrictions! here’s what i tried & failed to embed here:

    have a great weekend, damnit.
    –j.

    Reply

  62. Bacteriaburger
    May 25, 2007 @ 07:20:00

    whutta party!

    Reply

  63. jlosey
    May 31, 2007 @ 17:30:00

    If Tom of Finland is right, you must have had a wonderful erection when you wrote this story! Its deceptive opening lines soon explode into a hothouse atmosphere that is finally just HOT. Period. It’s fun to compare it to “428 College St,” which I loved. My way of seeing the two is like comparing a still photograph and a movie. Same raw materials but shaped entirely differently by the two forms. And both terrific! As always you develop a palpable sense of individual characters with just a few details, enough to make them seem to be actual guys rather than just agents of a sexual episode, no matter how intense. Thanks for the story!

    Reply

  64. Bacteriaburger
    May 31, 2007 @ 19:38:00

    Thanks jlosey, always appreciated

    Reply

  65. Anonymous
    Jun 06, 2007 @ 13:25:00

    I love that art work it was great to jerk off too. Your right about the nifty. Literotica and stickpen have some great ones, I alwyas get hard and have geat jerks to those sites.

    Reply

  66. Dwight
    Jun 06, 2007 @ 18:17:00

    Congrats, Natty! I will have to pick up a copy! Although I wish it was the one with this guy on the cover. ๐Ÿ˜‰

    Reply

  67. Bacteriaburger
    Jun 06, 2007 @ 18:59:00

    Thanks Dwight. Yeah, my guy isn’t so much “all that,” but he’s okay I guess. See him here.

    Reply

  68. Bacteriaburger
    Jun 06, 2007 @ 19:03:00

    I will have to check out Literotica. Thanks for the tip.

    Reply

  69. Bacteriaburger
    Jun 06, 2007 @ 19:11:00

    I’m always right. ๐Ÿ™‚

    Reply

  70. crake23@yahoo.com
    Jun 06, 2007 @ 19:29:00

    i highly recommend the soundtrack to shortbus. that’s all. have a great day. –j.

    Reply

  71. Bacteriaburger
    Jun 07, 2007 @ 08:02:00

    Shortbus got me into The Hidden Cameras, that’s fer sure.

    Reply

  72. crake23@yahoo.com
    Jun 07, 2007 @ 22:28:00

    ditto. i wants to get, uhm… The Smell Of Our Own, but it looks like I’m gonna haveta order the motherfucker, as the local stores i’ve been to didn’t carry it. they had AWOO, but i wants the other at the moment. nyah. –j.

    Reply

  73. Arctic Jay
    Jun 13, 2007 @ 01:24:00

    Watching the vid left me unfortunately more unsettled than aroused (though I won’t claim that I did not become the later). I couldn’t help but be distracted by questions popping in my head.

    First, what is the fascination with these “found” moments of straight male homo-eroticism? It can’t just be the type of athletic male bodies on display, plenty of gay porn offers perfectly identical specimens. Is it the camaraderie and vulgar sweetness that complements the sexual activity, and what does that suggest about gay male friendship?

    And is it really homosexual, or are we misinterpreting what really amounts to some mild hazing? Or maybe people become so comfortable with each other’s bodies that they can engage in very intimate activity without lustful motivation.

    Anyway, sorry for the killjoy post; I intended before I saw the video to just say that I enjoy your stories and think your latest is one of your best.

    Reply

  74. Bacteriaburger
    Jun 13, 2007 @ 07:39:00

    arctic jay –

    You raise some interesting points. That clip fascinates me as both an artist and as someone with an interest in human nature. It could be easily argued that my stories are full of “found” moments of straight male homoeroticism (which is why it interests me that you are a fan of my stories but also have issues with this clip). Of course, as I’ve argued previously on this blog, I don’t consider my characters to be “straight” – they are gay or bisexual, because they are having sex with other men.

    It’s quite likely that one or more of the fellows in this video are gay or bisexual (and I would consider even a guy who digs jerking off with another guy to be at least partly bisexual), and that is part of what interests me about it.

    Their behavior isn’t “homosexual” – but it is most certainly homoerotic, whether they view it as such or not.

    I think your unsettled reaction veers toward a larger criticism, which is the gay male eroticism of straight men. That’s a big can of worms, but I will make this point: Power and control (and lack of power and control) are major components of most people’s fantasies. We often eroticize what we fear, the things that have power over us (hence the “Village People”-stereotypes of the seventies – cowboy, cop, etc). Viewing “straight” guys engaging in typical gay-male behavior offers us some control over them, an identification.

    These rugby guys can get away with kissing and tugging at each other’s dicks without being labeled as gay. I won’t go so far as to say that’s what makes it so appealing for a gay audience, but it definitely may play into it. Personally, I don’t think this says anything about gay male friendship. Many gays have a level of camaraderie with their friends that is shown here (and then some).

    Ultimately, our turn-ons don’t define us. Eroticism isn’t politically correct, or even moral. We’re attracted to the taboos, to the grey areas. The feminist with rape fantasies, the homophobe lurking at the rest stop, the christian overzealously crusading against child pornography. It’s only negative if you behave negatively. Tucked firmly into the realm of fantasy anything is possible, and everything is good.

    Reply

  75. Bacteriaburger
    Jun 13, 2007 @ 09:56:00

    Oh also – I’m glad you liked the story! Thanks for the compliment and also for giving me something interesting to respond to.

    Reply

  76. arctic jay
    Jun 16, 2007 @ 23:45:00

    I posed the question about gay friendship (I hope it didn’t seem critical; I don’t think gay friendships are any more lacking than other types of relationships) because an extreme interest in a specific narrative, especially a pornographic one, to me, either suggests identification or wish fulfillment. Sure, some gay men may be attracted to these situations because it recalls early formative sexual experiences, but how many are drawn to “straight-for-gay” because it allows them to witness something previously inaccessible? A greater percentage, I would guess. Then there’s idealization, which plays a major part in the eroticizing of something foreign. I had the comical experience of reading a DataLounge thread about “The Death of Gay Porn,” where the gay respondants extolled straight porn because, “the men are hotter and look like they’re really enjoying themselves,” only to go to another thread on another board, this about women and porn preferences, where many of the female respondants said they only watch gay porn because the “the men are hotter yadda yadda.” I’m guessing this is my reason for exciting over six-pack homoerotics: straight boys just seem more innocent to me. It doesn’t matter how much pussy a jock’s had, what we’re seeing in the locker room is virginal, or semi-virginal, contact. Add to the fact that such contact may be preceeded by a since-we-were-kids friendship between the participants and you have something often sorely missing from gay narratives where that chronology is often inverted. And, ironically. the homophobic undercurrent gives another key element that (modern) gay porn also tends to lack: a sense of boundaries.

    As for how I can like your writing and have issues with the clip? That stems from the fact that I usually like writing I have issues with. Anything that can be written that’d be completely unproblematic for me, I’d be able to write myself ๐Ÿ™‚

    Reply

  77. Bacteriaburger
    Jun 17, 2007 @ 07:28:00

    Great point about virginal contact – I may use that in a story sometime. You hit it on the head as far as why so many porno stories leave me cold – there’s no danger, no conflict when gay guys who are completely fine with themselves and their sexuality get together. It’s like “Brokeback Mountain,” y’know? Romance needs some sort of conflict. I had a woman write to me who was a fan of my stuff, and I asked her why. She said much of the same – that straight romance just isn’t interesting anymore, because there’s nothing to go up against.

    You say “an extreme interest in a specific [pornographic] narrative suggests either identification or wish fulfillment.” I would argue that identification – aside from the purposes of relating to the world of a story and its rules – is exactly what we *don’t* seek for erotic pleasure. We seek the ideal, the fantasy – the things that don’t truly exist, the things that we do not have. And though I don’t think you are suggesting this at all, I want to re-state that there’s *nothing wrong* with this. It’s healthy to get in touch with even the basest of one’s desires – provided you don’t take it too far. Provided you can separate reality from fantasy, and take equal pleasure in both.

    Reply

  78. arctic jay
    Jun 18, 2007 @ 01:32:00

    There are so many issues here in need of thorough examination. Especially the potential pitfalls of exploring base desires *even within* the bounds of ethical behavior (the most unsettling thing about the video was actually the casual exhibitionism, but I decided not to to delve into that), but I don’t want to treat your blog like a soapbox. I will speculate that, as societal repression stops providing the necessary conflict a story needs for its charge, gay literature, including gay sex writing (is that the proper term for it now?), will have to become a lot more character driven and rely less on hoary archetypes and narrative arcs. Writers’ will start having to draw on the conflict that’s inherent in sexual relationships themselves. At least that’s what I’m attempting to do.

    Thanks for responding to my comments, and keep up the good work.

    Reply

  79. Bacteriaburger
    Jun 19, 2007 @ 06:57:00

    Hey – what good are blogs if not for being a soapbox? ๐Ÿ™‚

    Send some of your work my way, if you would – I’d love to check it out.

    Reply

  80. jlosey
    Jun 25, 2007 @ 19:33:00

    Great email! She’s right, too.

    Reply

  81. Dwight
    Jun 29, 2007 @ 04:23:00

    Good luck on the househunting! But moving out of the city?! Nooo … we’re losing another young person! โ€ฆ I’m jealous of you on your San Fran trip, but I’ll be going in November. โ€ฆ And CONGRATS on the story! ๐Ÿ™‚ And AWWWWWWW … you big softy. I probably would have kept the kitten too. So cute. Post a pic!

    Reply

  82. Bacteriaburger
    Jun 29, 2007 @ 06:37:00

    Re: moving out of the city. I know, I know. But I grew up in a small, rural town, and I miss it. I’ve lived in the city for eight years now, and that’s enough for me.

    I wanted to post a pic of the little farty cat last night but I couldn’t find the cable for my camera. I’ll post a pic today. I named him Puffy.

    Reply

  83. Rodrigo
    Jul 01, 2007 @ 10:37:00

    Oi, achei teu blog pelo google tรก bem interessante gostei desse post. Quando der dรก uma passada pelo meu blog, รฉ sobre camisetas personalizadas, mostra passo a passo como criar uma camiseta personalizada bem maneira. Atรฉ mais.

    Reply

  84. Bacteriaburger
    Jul 01, 2007 @ 18:31:00

    Si, asshole

    Reply

  85. David
    Jul 05, 2007 @ 22:57:00

    Yeah! good for you. Stick it to the man!

    Reply

  86. Dwight
    Jul 07, 2007 @ 13:26:00

    That’s great. You should have gotten more than your money back!

    Reply

  87. crake23@yahoo.com
    Jul 11, 2007 @ 21:25:00

    One of my favorites for a long time was the “Alpha Male” story-line, by David Buffet. Reading that’s one of the things that helped get me through my second tour of Iraq. You can find him in the prolific authors’ section. Unfortunately, it’s incomplete on Nifty. waaa!

    –j.

    Reply

  88. Dwight
    Aug 02, 2007 @ 03:24:00

    Damn … hotness. I think I’m going to disguise myself as that guy’s couch!

    Reply

  89. Dwight
    Aug 02, 2007 @ 03:25:00

    Going to see Stroud while you’re in SF? I’m going in Nov. and we’re tentatively going to get together for lunch or something. You should take him to the porn set. Hahah.

    Reply

  90. Bacteriaburger
    Aug 07, 2007 @ 17:25:00

    Dwight – no Stroud sightings, unfortunately. How is that guy doing? Will you tell him I said hi? He probably would have loved the porn set, he’s such a gay-wannabee ๐Ÿ™‚

    Reply

  91. arctic_jay
    Aug 11, 2007 @ 23:51:00

    Responding more to fictional representation than actual, I think, is a major identifying trait of a creative person. The point of art is to improve upon nature; all artist’s are hopelessly dissatisfied on some level with real life and therefore use fantasy to make life adhere to one’s personal aesthetic, which is why I consider pornography to be, at least definitionally, the truest art form.

    Regarding this I’m left wondering what the inadequacies of actual sex are and can actual sex ever fulfill the promises of fantasy?

    Reply

  92. Bacteriaburger
    Aug 12, 2007 @ 13:21:00

    It’s important to place value in both fantasy and reality, and doubly important to know the boundaries of both. Fantasies (dreams, art, beauty) enrich our lives, but they are also treacherous. I think that MOST people are hopelessly dissatisfied with real life – thinking their lives would improve if they moved to another city, or their relationship would be better if they were with somebody else, etc.

    Can actual sex fulfill the promises of fantasy? Sometimes. While one will never be able to fuck a Tom of Finland drawing, one does have the ability to bring aspects of their fantasy life into the bedroom. I think many people don’t allow themselves to fantasize with their partners – to pretend they are somebody else, for instance. But for a relationship to remain healthy, it has to allow for this.

    I’m bursting with stuff to say on this subject, and not just in regard to sex. I spent the majority of my life believing that others were living more fully than me. My main source of inspiration is the yearning I feel when I imagine others are having amazing sex, or living free, ecstatic lives. The most significant point in my development (as an artist and as a person) so far has been to acknowledge that this is just fantasy, and to accept and love myself and my life for what it is. Only then was I able to relax, to focus less on living the fantasy, and more on writing about it.

    Reply

  93. arctic_jay
    Aug 12, 2007 @ 23:15:00

    “I think that MOST people are hopelessly dissatisfied with real life…”

    I should have specified more clearly. You can be dissatisfied in many ways and not all of them drive artistic persuits, but all artists seem to be dissatisfied with life when measured against their aesthetic standard. Beauty (which you list as and element of fantasy) is a result of meaning. Artists make things more beautiful essentially by making them more meaningful. Pornographers do the same thing, only instead of beauty, they impart eroticism. If you describe a man giving another a blow job in straightfoward objective detail, it’s doubtful it’ll be arousing, but if you make the giver a straight guy blowing his friend in a moment of inebriate weakness, then the meaning of the act is one of trangression and therefore potentially very erotic.

    “Only then was I able to relax, to focus less on living the fantasy, and more on writing about it.”

    I’ve no doubt you chose the saner path, but I regard fantasy (and the art that results) in the opposite way. I see it as a reproach to the common and accessible life available to me and a challenge to live as meaningfully as possible. I see art as facilitating that goal and so am not worried that “living the fantasy” will be a hindrance to my creativity. But then I might just be a lot more naive than you are ๐Ÿ˜‰

    Reply

  94. Dwight
    Aug 20, 2007 @ 03:28:00

    I feel like this comment is so shallow considering the others, but this sounds like a blast. ๐Ÿ™‚

    Reply

  95. Bacteriaburger
    Aug 20, 2007 @ 16:43:00

    Thanks Dwight; even though I took the “cold shower” approach with this blog, it really was an awesome experience!!

    Reply

  96. Wulf
    Aug 24, 2007 @ 23:29:00

    There’s a similar moment in the film “Living in Oblivion”, where the sound man calls for silence so he can record ‘room sound’ and the rather frantic story of low-budget filmmaking pauses for a long, luxurious minute as each of the characters stands absorbed in their own thoughts.

    Good to know it happens in ‘real life’ too.

    Reply

  97. Bacteriaburger
    Aug 25, 2007 @ 05:27:00

    Oh man, that’s cool – I’ve been meaning to watch that movie for years now. I’ll put it on my list.

    Reply

  98. Anonymous
    Aug 26, 2007 @ 16:45:00

    Thank you.. now I can’t stop looking at him!

    Reply

  99. jlosey
    Aug 27, 2007 @ 22:59:00

    Yep, it worked for me too! ๐Ÿ™‚

    Reply

  100. arctic_jay
    Aug 28, 2007 @ 20:37:00

    I’m sorry, but I’m going to have to disagree with you on this one. I find Susie Bright’s response to this phenomenon neither insightful or well-reasoned.

    Ostensibly, the issue here is gay rights, or, more generally, sexual liberty, and by showcasing the bathroom dalliances of legislators who’ve taken an anti-gay-rights stance an implied argument is made that that stance is weakened or shown to be unsupportable. But to make such an argument is a form of ad hominem, tu quoque, which deals specifically with the relevance of hypocrisy. When a politician argues on behalf of legislation to be voted upon by the public or other politicians, only the soundness of his arguments should be taken into account. Their sexual behavior, whether or not it is in accordance to their arguments, is completely irrelevant. If Susie really cared about privacy as much as she claims, she would not broadcast private activities that are irrelevant to the political discourse.

    I also find the charge of narcissism to be bogus. Accepting a moral proscript that runs counter to your own desires is evidence against narcissism, while tailoring a moral system to accommodate your desires evidence for it.

    I should mention that I find the link to Wonkette’s site, which treated a murder-suicide in such a glib fashion, as if it were okay to do so if the deaths were of Republicans who were against gay marriage, distasteful.

    Reply

  101. Bacteriaburger
    Aug 29, 2007 @ 06:49:00

    Well arctic_jay, you’re barking up the wrong tree here, but nevertheless…

    I agree with you that there is a conflict with Susie’s belief in privacy versus exposing hypocrites. But I think it’s safe to say that many Americans feel personally violated by the stance that these politicians take – it’s an invasion of our privacy, it’s impinging on our rights.

    So, okay, what I’m essentially saying is “they started it.” And I agree with you on an intellectual level – but this kind of stuff is part of the political discourse at this point…

    Reply

  102. BobC
    Sep 05, 2007 @ 20:12:00

    Hold on, aj and bb! The issue is whether the SOB was enticed, lured or entrapped. I’ll argue for days that the atmosphere closeted creeps like him and Dan Savage’s friend Santorum have created creates a culture in the police of arrest and harassment. My question to the cop would be, if the man had been looking for someone to smoke a Marlboro with instead of smoking his dick, would he have been arrested? Of course not. Why then? Because the Republicans have been using Gays as a wedge issue since Lincoln died. And because the average victim pleads out the way the good senator did. Easy arrest statistics, no work for the DA, no bloody gloves appearing after the evidence locker is closed for the day.

    Now about expecting his Senate ID to get off the hook, about what crap his wife and kids are going to endure, about how he deserves every kick he gets, well, that’s just too bad. I am in politics to win. And it’s better if it’s the other guy who bleeds.

    Outing? Not the poor schmuck who works a Walmart and fears for his job if he comes out. Not the organist at church, who is abused by the pastor because he is grateful to have any job at all after the last church fired him. Not the dyke running the elementary school library in Bison Pattie Kansass or Boll Weevil turd, Missipissi. But hate-mongers? HANG ‘EM HIGH!

    Reply

  103. Bacteriaburger
    Sep 05, 2007 @ 20:36:00

    Hell yeah, bobC. And the NYTimes editorial I posted today expounds on your first point.

    Reply

  104. BobC
    Sep 05, 2007 @ 21:14:00

    used condoms in playgrounds

    Reply

  105. Dwight
    Sep 14, 2007 @ 03:49:00

    Damn. The clips were unavailable.

    Reply

  106. Bacteriaburger
    Sep 14, 2007 @ 06:55:00

    Man, what a bummer. They were just there a few days ago…he must have taken them down.

    Reply

  107. crake23@yahoo.com
    Sep 14, 2007 @ 07:53:00

    Yay for work!
    If you get the time, scope out some new-ish work by one of my other favorite (porn)writers:

    http://www.awesomedude.com/davidbuffet/past_perfect/index.htm

    Have a great day,
    –j.

    Reply

  108. Susie Bright
    Sep 28, 2007 @ 19:46:00

    And I’m so glad you did!

    Reply

  109. Bacteriaburger
    Sep 29, 2007 @ 08:55:00

    My stoopid blog just reached new levels of classiness. Thanks Susie!

    Reply

  110. Suns
    Sep 29, 2007 @ 17:03:00

    Kurt Eichewald and Justin Berry uploaded child porn to a site in order to entrap innocent gay men who had no idea that that stuff was being uploaded. They should both go to jail.

    No one seems to be writing about that.

    Reply

  111. Bacteriaburger
    Sep 29, 2007 @ 19:36:00

    suns,
    This information against Eichenwald came to light through the criminal trial of one of the four men that he and Berry turned in. Bright’s piece doesn’t go into this much, but Debbie Nathan’s Counterpunch article has more. As far as these guys being innocent…I haven’t read much into that.

    Reply

  112. Suns
    Sep 30, 2007 @ 18:00:00

    Yes I know that. The trail is is that of one Tim Richards. All of the information that’s come out about Eichewald and Berry in the last year is a result of his investigative work. And I do mean all of it. He claims to be totally innocent by the way and I believe him. Read the GenerationQ articles about Tim Richards. You’ll get plenty of information there.

    Reply

  113. Dwight
    Oct 02, 2007 @ 03:04:00

    Thank god, I thought it was just me! I can totally dig guys with his body type, but I’m with you, Joey Boots does not one iota of anything for me. But Jason Ridge is a hot piece and the scenario as a whole is a total friggin turn on!

    Reply

  114. Robguy
    Oct 02, 2007 @ 22:08:00

    I’m going with #3
    Jason is very hot, he even smolders when eyeing up Joey.

    Reply

  115. strikeny@aol
    Oct 04, 2007 @ 09:42:00

    hey man, just found your site…love it. don’t know if you still see comments on posts this old but do have a fav. porn scene I think you’d like…arcade on route 9 (joe gage) dad takes his son to the video arcade….they go into the booth together….dad shows son how to use the glory hole…very hot.
    enjoy your nifty contributions 2…have a question about stickypen…can u search by subject? have a good one.
    strikeny

    Reply

  116. Bacteriaburger
    Oct 04, 2007 @ 10:36:00

    Hey guy,

    Funny you should mention Joe Gage, as I’m writing for him these days (see more on my “word made flesh” entry elsewhere on the blog). I’ve seen the scene you mention, and it’s a good one.

    Reply

  117. strikeny
    Oct 05, 2007 @ 07:07:00

    cool man…I’m sure it’ll be a good match…I enjoy your stories and his.
    good luck with that ๐Ÿ˜‰

    Reply

  118. Anonymous
    Oct 19, 2007 @ 14:14:00

    Harmony is my favorite song by this band so far, but I haven’t heard their FUNF album yet.

    –j.

    Reply

  119. Anonymous
    Nov 15, 2007 @ 18:15:00

    like it – keep up the blog .. enjoy reading your fiction and your comments .. want to read more ๐Ÿ˜€

    Reply

  120. Anonymous
    Nov 18, 2007 @ 14:03:00

    I really liked it.

    I’ve been in that situation, though I didn’t get off with the other guy – didn’t have the guts for that then.

    Is it a story, or did it really happen?

    Reply

  121. Bacteriaburger
    Nov 18, 2007 @ 14:44:00

    might’ve

    Reply

  122. Anonymous
    Nov 18, 2007 @ 14:47:00

    Yeah, it was a stupid question ๐Ÿ™‚
    wistful thinking on my part…

    And again, great stuff.

    Reply

  123. Bacteriaburger
    Nov 18, 2007 @ 19:36:00

    haha, thanks so much. And yeah, it’s fiction.

    Reply

  124. battyMC
    Nov 19, 2007 @ 20:46:00

    enjoyed this. it had good momentum.

    Reply

  125. Bacteriaburger
    Nov 19, 2007 @ 21:05:00

    Thanks guys. Very cool to get positive reinforcement for non-porn stuff.

    Reply

  126. Anonymous
    Nov 23, 2007 @ 17:24:00

    Great story, man. I’d like to read more of it; is it part of a larger piece?

    Reply

  127. Bacteriaburger
    Nov 23, 2007 @ 18:09:00

    Thanks! Yes, it’s part of a larger piece – I’m working on it.

    Reply

  128. Dwight
    Dec 13, 2007 @ 05:32:00

    He he. That is how I always introduce myself when I meet a new person: “Hi, I’m Dwight, nice to meet you, I want to feel a cock sliding in and out of my ass.”

    Reply

  129. Dwight
    Jan 05, 2008 @ 10:30:00

    Oh, he is one sexy boy. And I can’t wait to hear your review of Dixter. ๐Ÿ™‚

    Reply

  130. Anonymous
    Jan 31, 2008 @ 12:23:00

    this scared the dogshit outta me the first time i saw it… so i rewatched it a few times, then showed it to my friends. y’know, for yucks.

    –j.

    Reply

  131. David
    Feb 04, 2008 @ 07:50:00

    Thanks for introducing me to these guys! And the video for Lucky Number Nine is brilliant.

    Reply

  132. Bacteriaburger
    Feb 04, 2008 @ 07:59:00

    You are welcome, friend

    Reply

  133. david
    Feb 08, 2008 @ 07:32:00

    I know that feeling all too well.

    Reply

  134. Bacteriaburger
    Feb 08, 2008 @ 20:03:00

    Thanks so much for responding.

    Reply

  135. david
    Feb 10, 2008 @ 15:30:00

    Thank you for writing this blog so I can respond.

    Reply

  136. david
    Feb 10, 2008 @ 15:33:00

    lol, all three of these are going in my favorites.

    Reply

  137. Dwight Supremacy
    Feb 11, 2008 @ 19:43:00

    Oh man. That is amazing and creepy and strange and wonderful and eerie. Wow!

    Reply

  138. Dwight Supremacy
    Feb 11, 2008 @ 19:47:00

    It is so strange. “Road House” has been mentioned to me several times in several different arenas of life. Just odd.

    Reply

  139. Bacteriaburger
    Feb 12, 2008 @ 11:32:00

    It’s worth your time, if only for the gratuitous man-butt shots.

    Reply

  140. david
    Feb 19, 2008 @ 01:56:00

    What the hell? I find myself fascinated with the psychological reasons why they would destroy those magazines. That’s like destroying a rare and wonderful treasure that only comes once in a lifetime; if that often.

    Reply

  141. Bacteriaburger
    Feb 19, 2008 @ 10:08:00

    Memory is hazy. I wish I could give you even a superficial reason, but I just don’t know.

    Reply

  142. RJ March
    Feb 23, 2008 @ 12:43:00

    It seems to me that that’s what boy’s do. We pissed on the hot coals of a barbecue once. Go figure.

    “Kill the things that scare you” comes to my mind.

    Reply

  143. Bacteriaburger
    Feb 23, 2008 @ 15:31:00

    Good analysis Mr. March. A real honor to have you around these parts.

    Reply

  144. RJ March
    Feb 24, 2008 @ 16:53:00

    That is so fucking cool. I am considerably older than you. There was no such thing as the Internet when I was 15, and I think I’m better off for that. I did, however, subscribe to a catalog called Ah-Men that was ostensibly a clothing catalog, but also offered coffee table books of male nudes and an outrageous selection of underwear modeled by wickedly hot guys. I’m not sure how, or if, I got away with that act of boldness.

    Reply

  145. Bacteriaburger
    Feb 24, 2008 @ 17:33:00

    I looked up the Ah Men catalog. Incredible! Featured Paul Barresi and Jack Wrangler as underwear models!

    My budding sexuality had to make do with the occasional errant International Male catalog that found its way to our house.

    Then came the internet and the Nifty Archive. I had stacks of printed-out stories in a locked trunk in my room, alongside stacks of floppy disks – each of which held about 20 images I’d get from the “M4M PIC4PIC” chat rooms on AOL…memories…

    Reply

  146. david
    Feb 26, 2008 @ 08:23:00

    Finding stacks of playboys and sex shacks, wtf kind of place did you grow up in? lol.

    Reply

  147. Bacteriaburger
    Feb 26, 2008 @ 18:59:00

    The sex shack – I’ll grant you – was weird. But didn’t everybody experience “woods porn”? Maybe it’s a Western Pennsylvania thing…

    Reply

  148. dwight
    Mar 05, 2008 @ 06:17:00

    “Tearoom” is fascinating. I watched the clip of the footage from the Web site. It was titillating at times.

    Reply

  149. JW Veldhoen
    Mar 20, 2008 @ 18:04:00

    Weed weed weed weed weed weed

    Maybe you’ve only had Western PA
    ditch weed? Maybe you need the
    haaazzzeeeeeeeeee…

    Reply

  150. Bacteriaburger
    Mar 20, 2008 @ 20:45:00

    Lord help me I’ve had my fair share of both. I’m on a seven-year sabbatical from weed, at least. Too much paranoia; it’ll destroy ya.

    Reply

  151. arctic_jay
    Mar 26, 2008 @ 01:36:00

    It’s so strange to think that Auden wrote this at the age of 41, ten years after he wrote “September 1, 1939.” It reads more like an anxious, but prodigious effort of a much younger poet. To me, the focus on physical admiration, rather than simple lust, is the only factor suggesting sexual maturity.

    And what is “Platonic Blow” supposed to mean anyway? Is he defining the ideal, pure concept of a blow job that all earthly blow jobs should attempt to imitate, or is it supposed to be an ironic use of the modern meaning of the word? Perhaps the act becomes so intimate that it transcends its sexual nature.

    In any case, I found the poem, and its maddening rhyming, much more enjoyable when I sang it in my head like an old pop standard. I imagined it the lyrics of a long lost Cole Porter song.

    Reply

  152. david
    Mar 31, 2008 @ 04:04:00

    wtf?! are people in kentucky dumb as hell?

    Reply

  153. david
    Apr 04, 2008 @ 08:29:00

    I find it strange that the woman in this post and the woman in your previous post look similar.

    Reply

  154. Bacteriaburger
    Apr 04, 2008 @ 14:58:00

    Oh my god you’re right. Maybe I have an unconscious fetish for doughy, bland-faced white women?

    Reply

  155. Dwight Supremacy
    Apr 07, 2008 @ 17:58:00

    so disgusting. that idiot woman!

    Reply

  156. Radiomars
    Apr 22, 2008 @ 11:00:00

    you can think this too: you are a fly growing inside of a balloon, soon you will know all your world and his boundries but… what you know about the world outside far from the balloon?

    Reply

  157. david
    Apr 24, 2008 @ 21:38:00

    Link for the mp3 is dead, at least I can’t get it to work.

    Reply

  158. Bacteriaburger
    Apr 25, 2008 @ 07:28:00

    Hmmm, still works for me – tested it on my home computer last night and my work computer today. The same song is on their MySpace too.

    Reply

  159. david
    Apr 26, 2008 @ 03:11:00

    I’m the same way. When I hear a song I like I listen to it over and over until I burn myself out. And when I’m in a situation where I can’t listen to it for whatever reason, my need to hear it builds builds until I can’t take it anymore. Finally when I am able to listen to it again, there’s a total release of that stress. The only thing I can think to compare it to is a junkie getting his fix.

    Reply

  160. Cristiano.
    Apr 30, 2008 @ 19:39:00

    Great songs, and somehow i can see the characters in your stories relating to them; could this be the band that Forest from Hippie Crack played in after he finally moved out? What i mean is, your writing opens up the characters, so much so that i can write this funny little comment about one of them, my favourite, having an actual musical taste… as hippie as it sounds, but these guys you write about, they sound as they are so free……..which is the sexiest thing……..you stories are amazing. Thank you

    Reply

  161. Bacteriaburger
    May 01, 2008 @ 09:44:00

    david – I made it through all of the day before yesterday without listening. I think the further I get away from my initial obsession the better, as this is music that will hold up over time. Thankfully I ordered Papercuts’ first album and should be receiving it next week…

    cristiano. –

    Thanks for the great praise, it made my day. I wonder where Forest is nowadays? Probably married to a sweet girl, but goes to shows with his gay buddy and doesn’t mind letting him suck him off now and then when the two of them have drank a lot of beer. An easy going sort of guy, Forest.

    Reply

  162. arctic_jay
    May 03, 2008 @ 20:38:00

    I have this intense hunger for haughty, literary sex stories even though I’ve never found an author that really did it right for me. Are there any you’d recommend? I had to force myself to get to the end of “The Story of O” even though it was completely stultifying and unerotic. I like George Bataille and Kathy Acker, but sexual arousal is more the subject rather than the goal of their work. I’ve read about a chapter’s worth of Nin but I honestly can’t remember if I liked it, so I’ll give her another try.

    It’s awesome you’re making good progress on your book. I find even the idea of writing a novel intimidating. I wish you continuous luck.

    Reply

  163. Anonymous
    May 04, 2008 @ 03:50:00

    one of my favorite books is “Oryx and Crake”. this snippet reminds me of that, except without all the anger. very nice, man. –j.

    Reply

  164. Bacteriaburger
    May 04, 2008 @ 08:25:00

    I couldn’t get through “The Story of O” either. Interesting stuff, it just wasn’t my bag. George Bataille – that shit’s fucked up! Never heard of Kathy Acker… You know, I’m not exactly indebted to the classics. I like trash.

    Nin’s erotica is fun. She never took it seriously. I like all that anonymous Victorian-era stuff like “My Secret Life,” which is definitely haughty thought not exactly literary.

    Also thanks for the words of encouragement regarding the novel project. I’ve eliminated the intimidation factor by making it a collection of stories centered on a rural town – a porno version of “Winesburg, Ohio,” if you will.

    Reply

  165. Bacteriaburger
    May 04, 2008 @ 08:29:00

    I love Atwood and “Oryx and Crake” is on my shelf, I just haven’t gotten to it yet. Thanks!

    Reply

  166. Cristiano
    May 05, 2008 @ 16:40:00

    Hey writer
    the trees from the forest – or is it the trees form the forest? anyway, read your post listening to this, wonder if thereยดs any of those feelings in your book; and it really does sound like one of your titles – late night partner, by ed harcourt. Ok only a suggestion…

    Reply

  167. Bacteriaburger
    May 05, 2008 @ 18:26:00

    maybe, maybe…

    Reply

  168. Anonymous
    May 09, 2008 @ 02:40:00

    i don’t believe that you need to be told that success is the one true barometer for quality work– you fucking well know your shit is good.
    stop beating yourself up, damnit.
    oh, and if you decide to write more porn, that’d be great.

    don’t forget to bring some strong sunblock when you go to burning man, muthafuckah.

    respect,
    –j.

    Reply

  169. Bacteriaburger
    May 09, 2008 @ 06:17:00

    I AM writing porn…aren’t I?

    Reply

  170. david
    May 09, 2008 @ 22:04:00

    goddamn those donuts look tasty.

    Reply

  171. david
    May 12, 2008 @ 04:07:00

    I wonder how much cum ashton can swallow.

    Reply

  172. Bacteriaburger
    May 12, 2008 @ 11:06:00

    Not as much as you’d imagine.

    Reply

  173. Dwight Supremacy
    May 13, 2008 @ 01:29:00

    Cream filled is what I wasn’t after reading that story. ๐Ÿ˜‰

    Reply

  174. Paul
    May 15, 2008 @ 00:06:00

    There’s a marvellous austerity to Edward Gorey’s “uncommonly well set-up” pornography; it’s like starving on wintry smiles, but there IS a wonderful literary tension to it you might like.

    Reply

  175. david
    May 15, 2008 @ 06:34:00

    “let me come and tickle that nasty salty pickle for a buffalo nickel”

    that gets me every time i watch this.

    Reply

  176. Bacteriaburger
    May 15, 2008 @ 08:14:00

    Man, who knew Gorey did porn? [not me, obviously]. Thanks for the tip.

    Reply

  177. Bacteriaburger
    May 15, 2008 @ 08:17:00

    This has been in my head all morning.

    Reply

  178. tnsloruner
    May 19, 2008 @ 09:32:00

    Congratulations! That’s great news…can’t wait to read the story…and the novel.

    Reply

  179. Bacteriaburger
    May 19, 2008 @ 14:40:00

    Thanks man!

    Reply

  180. Anonymous
    May 20, 2008 @ 05:10:00

    yay!

    –j.

    Reply

  181. dwight
    May 20, 2008 @ 14:53:00

    Cool. Congrats! And as Cher said in “Moonstruck”: Snap out of it! ๐Ÿ™‚

    Reply

  182. dwight
    May 20, 2008 @ 15:00:00

    Dear lord, that is hot. I’ve heard for years on the Stern Show and it gets me horny every time I hear it! GREAT FIND!

    Reply

  183. Bacteriaburger
    May 20, 2008 @ 17:27:00

    Dwight, I knew if anyone could see the hotness in this it would be you. Glad you can appreciate turn-ons in unexpected places…

    Reply

  184. Anonymous
    May 26, 2008 @ 00:42:00

    I haven’t seen this film, but your account of it is fascinating and, yes, disturbing. I’d say your response and lingering questions are exactly the right ones. Now I’m torn whether to see the film for myself. Normally I’d reject commenting on something I haven’t seen, but I’m not sure how I’d handle the near-neutrality of the filmmakers where there are people’s live in the balance.

    Reply

  185. Bacteriaburger
    May 26, 2008 @ 19:03:00

    Thanks man. You should see it, I don’t hesitate to recommend it. In their defense, these are public suicides, I just had a problem with the lack of context.

    Reply

  186. Anonymous
    Jun 10, 2008 @ 05:07:00

    i’d been wondering wtf was with this film 4 some time– i just haven’t had the nerve 2 watch it myself. this goes well in2 the realm of subject matter i’d just as soon rather not see explored on an impersonal level. it seems the lack of context could closely skirt becoming full-on exploitation.

    for what it’s worth, Las Vegas still holds the #1 title as having the highest suicide-rate in the USA. make what u will of that shit. thx 4 going where i wouldn’t have, sir.

    –j.

    Reply

  187. Anonymous
    Jun 20, 2008 @ 06:08:00

    no joke– i fell asleep a couple times during The Fall. last movie i saw that was comparably disinteresting was some pocahontas movie by the guy who did The Thin Red Line a year or two back.
    i had high hopes for this one, and something tells me i’ll be even less engaged if i try & watch it again. nyah.

    –j.

    Reply

  188. Bacteriaburger
    Jun 27, 2008 @ 17:45:00

    I’m still perplexed why my reaction to this one was so strong while others who’ve seen it seem indifferent if not outright hostile. In all honesty, I *thought* I was going to be bored by it and was totally prepared just to soak in some interesting images and slog through the story; but the whole thing grabbed me by the throat and moved me.

    Reply

  189. Bacteriaburger
    Jun 27, 2008 @ 17:46:00

    Also, it should be said that my favorite movies are typically long, boring ones: “Blow-Up,” “Picnic at Hanging Rock,” Gus Van Sant’s last few…

    Reply

  190. Troy Christensen
    Jun 29, 2008 @ 16:54:00

    Any idea what happened to sandnstrand? Both youtube and xtube videos appear to be gone. Thanks.

    Reply

  191. Baal
    Jul 09, 2008 @ 17:16:00

    I know, this is an old entry but the firsts cene listed had me having to respond: The scene in that same movie with Kevin seduced in the motel room is one of my all time faves. If you’re still readng comments on years old posts, look up Julio’s Desires. It’s subtitled but there’s a scene where a guy in the army bets another he can play with his ass to the point that he doesn’t mind being fucked that will always be my fave. It’s worth checking out!

    Reply

  192. Bacteriaburger
    Jul 10, 2008 @ 07:42:00

    Baal,

    your description of that scene sold me! I’ll check that out right away…

    Reply

  193. david
    Jul 11, 2008 @ 21:43:00

    what’s your new home like?

    Reply

  194. Bacteriaburger
    Jul 12, 2008 @ 06:37:00

    I’m renting a house. It’s a little outside the city, but the area is like forest. The place is like a cabin – wood burning stove, big secluded yard, trees all around. it’s nice.

    Reply

  195. Anonymous
    Jul 15, 2008 @ 07:49:00

    movies:
    Iron Man = awesome! awesome!

    Hellboy 2 = ho-hum, pretty good

    Bella = somewhat dull, but not bad

    In Bruges = surprisingly good, though i’ve never had a mancrush on Colin Farrell

    There Will Be Blood = getting sleeeepy…

    tv:
    John From Cincinatti = nice start, but putters out in the middle

    porn:
    http://www.pridesites.com/omelissokomos/peterbilt/index.html

    word,
    –j.

    Reply

  196. Bacteriaburger
    Jul 15, 2008 @ 08:33:00

    Want to see Iron Man & Hellboy.

    There Will Be Blood…I was disappointed, but I think it will get better with repeated viewings, provided I’m interested enough to watch it again. Not sure.

    THANKS FOR THE PORN. I’m consuming porn like a mofo lately. I wish I got more tips on here.

    Reply

  197. Anonymous
    Jul 17, 2008 @ 04:35:00

    whups…
    knock of the last 2 characters from the p0rn link.
    sorry, bud.

    –j.

    Reply

  198. Dwight Supremacy
    Jul 29, 2008 @ 19:08:00

    Whoa! Those are hot!

    Reply

  199. Anonymous
    Aug 02, 2008 @ 05:05:00

    woo-hoo!

    welcome back, buddy!

    –j.

    Reply

  200. jlosey
    Aug 25, 2008 @ 18:23:00

    Hot story! Good to have you back. Hope the rigors of the move are soon forgotten.

    Reply

  201. jay
    Aug 29, 2008 @ 04:55:00

    language barrier: i can never get past reading the word “arse”, when used in porn. it’d be only slightly worse if british smut writers only called male genitalia “willies”, or something like that. damnit.

    i’ll totally be abusing my shame-shank to your latest story, as soon as i get home from work in a bit. thanks for posting it, good sir.

    respect,
    –j.

    Reply

  202. Bacteriaburger
    Aug 29, 2008 @ 06:05:00

    Shame-shank!

    Reply

  203. jakers
    Sep 02, 2008 @ 01:26:00

    anytime, buddy.

    Reply

  204. Dwight Supremacy
    Sep 10, 2008 @ 17:26:00

    โ€ข I must be as evil as those trolls, some of the stuff they did had me almost in tears!

    โ€ข The Craigslist post? Yeah, it is pretty hot. If I was a person who hooked up via online, I would be applying for the job. ๐Ÿ™‚

    โ€ข Don Draper (John Hamm). Oh god, yes. But I’ll have a baked potato. (Not sure if the “asparagus” reference is show-related or not.

    Reply

  205. Bacteriaburger
    Sep 11, 2008 @ 08:22:00

    Baked potato sounds just as delicious. Hell, I’d even take him with some liver and onions.

    Reply

  206. tnsloruner
    Sep 21, 2008 @ 11:43:00

    Where in the world is Natty? I am worried…

    Reply

  207. Anonymous
    Sep 30, 2008 @ 07:26:00

    I’ve just found your blog, and am motivated by your good things. Thanks for being out there.
    Very inspirational, humorous, a bit of life affirming too. Keep up the good work.
    DA

    Reply

  208. david
    Oct 08, 2008 @ 02:38:00

    Natty it makes me sick with worry already. One of my jobs is parttime grocery store cashier, at thank god a unionized store. Some of the daily dialogue has changed, ex. “Debit or credit?” “Debit.” “Any cash back?” ( with emphasis)”No.” How long until it’s “Fuck, no!” or worse yet “Empty the goddamn register.”
    o dear o dear o dear

    Reply

  209. Bacteriaburger
    Oct 08, 2008 @ 06:26:00

    Hang in there David. Like I said, I try not to worry about this stuff too much, and just wait for it to affect me personally. In the meantime we can always be pissed. Great thing congress passed that bailout plan, huh? Saved the economy, it did.

    Reply

  210. david
    Oct 10, 2008 @ 02:03:00

    lol. Haven’t seen the take on me video in a long time. I always thought the drawing of the lead singer was actually cuter than the real lead singer.

    Reply

  211. Bacteriaburger
    Oct 10, 2008 @ 11:19:00

    true dat

    Reply

  212. david
    Oct 10, 2008 @ 19:22:00

    Lovely, weird and disturbing.

    Reply

  213. wm
    Oct 11, 2008 @ 18:54:00

    this is so beautiful. i hope nobody fucks it up. is it in a suburb or actually in pittsburgh?

    Reply

  214. Bacteriaburger
    Oct 12, 2008 @ 11:44:00

    Glad you like, guys. wm, it is about 20 miles north of pittsburgh. I suspect there’s been a lot taken away from it already in the three years or so it’s been sitting there, but yeah, let’s hope it stays as is.

    Reply

  215. dwight
    Oct 12, 2008 @ 13:58:00

    So creepy. I like it.

    Reply

  216. arctic_jay
    Oct 19, 2008 @ 18:20:00

    I smiled a lot reading this one. The casual audacity of using the same plot devices found in your typical teen romance story, the car parked in the middle of nowhere, the shy, but ineptly concealed attempts at pushing things forward, in a father/son story creates a compelling surreality. It makes me wish someone would make a pornagraphic parody of “Superbad” or “American Pie” in which the dad applies horny, comedic strategies in order to get into his son’s pants. Or vice versa.

    Reply

  217. arctic_jay
    Oct 19, 2008 @ 18:24:00

    Off topic question: are you a fan of Fellini? I was reading one of your stories a while ago and a cafe in it was named “Cabiria’s.” I was wondering if that’s in tribute to “Nights of Cabiria.” “Cabiria” is my second favorite Fellini movie after “Satyricon.” And the only one to make me cry.

    Reply

  218. Bacteriaburger
    Oct 21, 2008 @ 12:49:00

    Thanks Jay. That’s not a bad idea, your dirty “American Pie” situation…

    I am a big fan of Satyricon, but I have never seen “Nights of Cabiria.” Yes, I need to see/appreciate more Fellini.

    Reply

  219. Anonymous
    Oct 26, 2008 @ 22:26:00

    I loved the drawings, watercolors, and biography of your great-uncle! (Talent runs in the family obviously.) There is something about the detail that makes the pictures palpably real, and that’s equally true in a different way in your stories.

    Reply

  220. Bacteriaburger
    Oct 27, 2008 @ 13:04:00

    Glad you liked! I’m a big fan too; thanks for the comparison.

    Reply

  221. jakers
    Nov 27, 2008 @ 17:51:00

    what up, mothafucka?
    sorry, had to. okay, was this post in any way inspired by thanksgiving?

    –j.

    Reply

  222. Bacteriaburger
    Nov 27, 2008 @ 19:26:00

    I guess that ass does sorta look like a golden brown turkey…disturbing. Good to hear from you J-bone!

    Reply

  223. SeraSera
    Dec 03, 2008 @ 19:09:00

    Wow. You probably know how much this resonates with my craigslist experience. Speaking of which…an email might be in order. It’s been a while.

    *hugs*

    Reply

  224. jakers
    Dec 14, 2008 @ 07:11:00

    new site, fucker? for realness?

    i've been mulling over starting a blogger-type website, since i'm about to quit my sorryass job & return to being a full-time student once again, and i's gonna be finding myself with a gawrshdarn awful lotta freetime soon.
    i fully intend on trying to pick your brain on the ins & outs of maintaining your own shiznit. later, though.

    so, what's the new venture? hunh? hunh? does it involve thxgiving turkeys or rimjobs?

    word,
    –j.

    Reply

  225. Bacteriaburger
    Dec 15, 2008 @ 13:39:00

    OF COURSE, sir. Blogger is easy to use, of course. My big test is going to be trying to integrate my blog into my site, cause I hate having them separate.

    The new venture CERTAINLY involves rimjobs. Everything I do involves rimjobs. EVERYTHING.

    Reply

  226. Anonymous
    Dec 20, 2008 @ 22:35:00

    Apparently the new version of the site isn’t online yet. Any prediction of when we can look for it? Thanks. BTW, I like the look!

    Reply

  227. Bacteriaburger
    Dec 21, 2008 @ 08:25:00

    No, it won’t be online for at least another month or so, if not a few. Glad you like the logo!

    Reply

  228. david
    Dec 24, 2008 @ 22:47:00

    Merry xmas Nate

    Reply

  229. Anonymous
    Dec 27, 2008 @ 06:37:00

    I think someone needs to come back to earth sometime soon! I suggest laying off the Lithium!!

    Reply

  230. Bacteriaburger
    Dec 27, 2008 @ 08:31:00

    ??

    Reply

  231. David
    Dec 30, 2008 @ 01:36:00

    I remember this movie! Creepy shit. She was molested by her father. She stabbed the dog with needles also.

    Reply

  232. Bacteriaburger
    Dec 30, 2008 @ 06:27:00

    “Child of Rage”

    I’m dying to see it.

    Reply

  233. Anonymous
    Jan 02, 2009 @ 19:55:00

    Why?

    Reply

  234. Bacteriaburger
    Jan 03, 2009 @ 09:43:00

    I SAID don’t ask!

    Reply

  235. arctic_jay
    Jan 03, 2009 @ 16:04:00

    I absolutely agree that it’s pointless to argue against degradation and debasement in porn on principled grounds, since porn’s only obligation is to get people off, and often people get off on that kind of thing. But I don’t think the comparison to the degradation of women in heterosexual porn works, since the audience for that is straight men. The viewer in that case is not relating to the one being degraded, as is the case with ST8-guy worshipping gay porn.

    I think porn offers a lot of sociological insight into human sexuality, and it wouldn’t be capable of that if restricted by politically correct concerns (and it wouldn’t be as fun as you pointed out), but I can’t help be on both your and the post writer’s side, since, if it weren’t for the fact gay men are so conflicted about their sexuality, would this kind of porn be so porn be so popular?

    Reply

  236. Bacteriaburger
    Jan 03, 2009 @ 21:02:00

    Okay then: in this case a more apt comparison to heterosexual porn would be that in which men play roles subservient to women (fem-dom, CFNM, etc). Should we concern ourselves with the straight men who consume this brand of porn and their inner conflicts?

    Yes, gay men carry a lot of shame and conflict over their sexuality, and this gets processed into an eroticization of homophobic imagery. Just as straight-male frustrations and aggression get processed into an eroticization of misogynistic imagery. Both are popular with their respective audiences. Both have ugly implications in reality. Fortunately – crucially – porn is not reality.

    Reply

  237. Bacteriaburger
    Jan 03, 2009 @ 21:12:00

    And if I may say so, arctic_jay, arguing with you is a pleasure I’ve missed in recent months…

    Reply

  238. arctic_jay
    Jan 04, 2009 @ 20:02:00

    Should we concern ourselves with the straight men who consume this brand of porn and their inner conflicts?

    I am “concerned” with the reasons why straight men consume porn that degrades them, as much as I am concerned with why anyone does so, insofar I think there’s value in understanding why people find pleasure in things widely and intuitively regarded as negative.

    As for fem-dom and CFNM, I’m not an expert (though I’ve seen my share), but in all the videos I’ve seen, the male, yes, is regarded as inferior, but always in some way remains a sexual and desired object. The mistress/dominatrix is usually shown as getting off on the interaction, sometimes exaggeratedly so, and the implication is that “sex” itself is reason enough for her involvement. In ST8-guy videos, however, the dynamic is different. The viewer is expected to be turned on by the fact that the ST8-guy is only having sex with a man for some other reason: he’s broke, he was tricked, etc.

    Fortunately – crucially – porn is not reality.

    Yes, and Madame Bovary and professional wrestling are not reality either, but both can be mined for insight into the psychology of those who produced them and find pleasure and relation to them. I in no way advocate for the straightjacketing of porn to meet the standards of self-appointed overseers of good taste, but at the same time, I don’t think we should avoid ever perceiving porn as symptomatic of a negative and problematic reality.

    I should say though, before securing my reputation as a crashing bore, that 95% of the time, I watch porn for its intended purpose ๐Ÿ˜‰

    Reply

  239. arctic_jay
    Jan 04, 2009 @ 20:06:00

    And if I may say so, arctic_jay, arguing with you is a pleasure I’ve missed in recent months…

    I appreciate that. I worry about coming of as single-mindedly contentious. The reason I spark up debate on your blog sometimes is because I’ve already said how much I like your writing and that hasn’t changed.

    Reply

  240. Bacteriaburger
    Jan 05, 2009 @ 13:57:00

    …there’s value in understanding why people find pleasure in things widely and intuitively regarded as negative.

    Let us be clear: this pleasure is found in the images of things that are widely regarded as negative, or in their acting out, in the safe and playful arena of eroticism. If porn is “symptomatic” of larger problems, well, some symptom!

    I disagree with your analysis of fem-dom and CFNM porn (though I’m also out of my element here). Gay and straight, there is a market for porn in which the male is degraded, and the dom’s lack of pleasure (aside from the pleasure of the degradation itself) is pretty much the point. The power imbalances depicted on gay-for-pay sites are more subtle, but no less intrinsic to their appeal.

    In your attempts to distinguish gay-for-pay from other types of porn it feels to me that you are taking particular issue with it. Are you?

    Reply

  241. arctic_jay
    Jan 06, 2009 @ 18:03:00

    “If porn is “symptomatic” of larger problems, well, some symptom!”

    The same could be said of confessional poetry and protest music, which is my point. Art usually deals with and evokes some kind of conflict, internal or external, even when the consuming of that art is pleasurable. Porn is no different.

    “In your attempts to distinguish gay-for-pay from other types of porn it feels to me that you are taking particular issue with it. Are you?”

    I don’t take issue with any kind of porn.

    I’m distinguishing it from the types of porn you’re comparing it to, but I don’t think it’s wholly unique. In my opinion, it’s more akin to straight men watching “lesbian” porn and gay and straight women writing and getting off to slash-fiction. It’s porn which erases or diminished the opportunity for the viewer to identify with what they’re watching, which is why sites that offer heterosexual videos for gay men seem like the natural next step to ST8-guy porn.

    “The power imbalances depicted on gay-for-pay sites are more subtle, but no less intrinsic to their appeal.”

    I could go into why I think the dynamics of femdom and gay-for-pay are different, but that would require an essay-length response. I should start my own blog on sexual matters.

    Reply

  242. Anonymous
    Jan 07, 2009 @ 19:32:00

    Although my two pages would undoubtedly put you to sleep, I wanted to say that I have found your two pages illuminating. Thank you.

    Reply

  243. David
    Jan 14, 2009 @ 21:53:00

    Billy Mays here reminding you that condoms are for pussies!

    lol, I love Billy.

    Reply

  244. Bacteriaburger
    Jan 15, 2009 @ 11:38:00

    He’s from Pittsburgh and my friend is his cousin!

    link

    Reply

  245. David
    Jan 18, 2009 @ 23:17:00

    I just saw the one with the two students on The Soup. I lol’d both times.

    Straight guys are fucked up.

    Reply

  246. David
    Jan 20, 2009 @ 02:32:00

    Nat – The thing about straight guys I don’t get is they’re always doing homoerotic shit with each other. A guy falls asleep and his friends put their dicks on his face; a guy joins a fraternity and they haze him by shoving a broomstick up his ass. Yet when they come into contact with a gay guy they freak out.

    I just don’t understand why they can’t get over themselves and experiment with each other for the experience that they so desperately desire. It’s truly one of the things in this world that drive me insane.

    Reply

  247. David
    Jan 20, 2009 @ 21:23:00

    “Fuck me gently with a chainsaw.”

    Why do I love seeing Shannon Doherty get slapped so much?

    Reply

  248. Bacteriaburger
    Jan 21, 2009 @ 19:51:00

    undoubtedly a classic

    Reply

  249. David
    Jan 24, 2009 @ 13:39:00

    I came.

    Reply

  250. Bacteriaburger
    Jan 24, 2009 @ 13:43:00

    Pure poetry, David.

    Reply

  251. Anonymous
    Jan 24, 2009 @ 23:53:00

    Hurrah! Well deserved!!

    Reply

  252. Bacteriaburger
    Jan 25, 2009 @ 00:15:00

    Thanks Anonymous!

    Reply

  253. David
    Jan 30, 2009 @ 23:57:00

    Wow, burgers that cum in your mouth. I need to eat at that restaurant.

    I would make a joke concerning burgers that cum in your mouth and your boyfriend Nat, but I figured it was too easy.

    Reply

  254. Dwight Supremacy
    Feb 07, 2009 @ 20:05:00

    That looks good! So, it will get here to Pittsburgh when it is released on DVD.

    Reply

  255. Rob W.
    Feb 08, 2009 @ 12:13:00

    not at all. I can’t wait until 80 years from now (I’ll still be around) when all these people are like ‘wait, why is this happening? I never heard about this sea-level rise thing.’ Wait for it. Cool photos by the way. That Obama shirt irks me.

    Reply

  256. Bacteriaburger
    Feb 08, 2009 @ 13:50:00

    Rob, you douche – how did you get such a sexy blog?? It looks fabulous!

    Reply

  257. Bacteriaburger
    Feb 08, 2009 @ 14:01:00

    And yeah, that Obama shirt is execrable. There was another one that said “Obama is my homeboy” – a little less offensive, but just as demeaning.

    Reply

  258. kserasera26
    Feb 09, 2009 @ 19:22:00

    I know a hott daddy when I see one.

    Congrats, muffin. You make this whore proud. Keep me posted.

    Reply

  259. Bacteriaburger
    Feb 10, 2009 @ 07:28:00

    Oh thank you my sweet Sera.

    Reply

  260. Rob W.
    Feb 10, 2009 @ 12:30:00

    wow! sounds like a lot of fun. that’s so cool that you got to collaborate on something like that. old and hairy, just how I like ’em. and thanks for the kudos about the blog! it’s still a work in progress.

    Reply

  261. Bacteriaburger
    Feb 10, 2009 @ 14:00:00

    Thanks, Rob. The story behind it is pretty interesting, to say the least.

    Reply

  262. Dwight Supremacy
    Feb 10, 2009 @ 18:27:00

    Oh wow, I didn’t realize this was your project. Awesome. I am intrigued to say the least! Can’t wait!

    Reply

  263. Bacteriaburger
    Feb 10, 2009 @ 20:24:00

    Thanks Dwight! I can’t wait either.

    Reply

  264. Rob W.
    Feb 13, 2009 @ 11:51:00

    I think this is rather nice, it goes into the ‘lit’erotica spectrum… not quite jack-offable to me, but caused a thought-provoking pensive boner. I think it approaches that American Beauty beauty and made me feel like a hypocrite: I found him revolting from the clothes and the suburbs and the cds but then he came out in basketball shorts… I hate materialism, but I love a cock behind basketball shorts.

    Reply

  265. Bacteriaburger
    Feb 13, 2009 @ 19:04:00

    Thank you Rob for your nice comment and your pensive boner…what an utterly ADORABLE image that paints! A pensive boner…I just wanna pat him on the head!

    Anyway, the line between “jack-offable” erotica and lit-erotica, as you term it, is something I think about a lot. I’m not entirely comfortable with writing stories that don’t give me a hard-on, but I seem to be doing it more often…
    Sorry, I lost my train of thought. Oh yeah – floppy cocks in mesh shorts…mmmmhmmm….

    Reply

  266. Anonymous
    Feb 14, 2009 @ 21:13:00

    this is a story that is plausible. how many times have we gone with someone not expecting too much and are surprised at how much more we got. not every story has to result in a hard-on, but this one did get my blood to boiling.

    thank you

    Reply

  267. arctic_jay
    Feb 14, 2009 @ 21:49:00

    Looks like Eve Sedgewick and Mark Simpson have been right all this time…

    Reply

  268. Rob W.
    Feb 14, 2009 @ 23:11:00

    My GOD where do you find these! I love it… I want a greek guy to show me the real meaning of life. Craigslist is so inspiring, I need to start looking at Lubbock’s for hilarity.

    Reply

  269. Bacteriaburger
    Feb 15, 2009 @ 08:23:00

    arctic_jay – Thanks for these references. I actually just discovered Mark Simpson and his blog. Eve Sedgewick I’d never heard of – seems potentially interesting, albeit uber-academic and hard to understand.

    Rob – These Craigslist posts take FOREVER to construct, so thanks. Here’s the site I use: http://www.craigshelper.com/

    Reply

  270. Bacteriaburger
    Feb 15, 2009 @ 08:24:00

    Thanks anonymous!

    Reply

  271. actic_jay
    Feb 16, 2009 @ 01:17:00

    I haven’t read her book, Between Men, yet, but considering her influences, it’s probably the case that her writing seems hard to understand because it’s mostly bs. Her basic premise, though, that men use sex with women as a way of bonding each other is entirely plausible.

    I mean that is what these guys are doing (especially the father/son teams), isn’t it?

    Reply

  272. Bacteriaburger
    Feb 16, 2009 @ 18:23:00

    We’ll never know for sure, I guess, but it seems like a good theory.

    Reply

  273. David
    Feb 16, 2009 @ 20:14:00

    What a world we live in. lol

    Reply

  274. Rob
    Feb 17, 2009 @ 00:19:00

    They seem like they could be lesbians just based on superficial mannerisms. It might just be that their object-sexuality simply makes them more androgynous. The World Trade Center stuff… wow, this is just bizarre and heavy, but I believe them and their feelings. I can’t laugh at this, it’s too… bleak. This reminds me a lot of furries, who all mostly have Asperger’s too.

    Reply

  275. Bacteriaburger
    Feb 17, 2009 @ 07:40:00

    I read somewhere that some women become attracted to objects when they have an excess of testosterone in their system.

    Personally I don’t see it as bleak. The emotions these women display seem genuine. Lust, overwhelming feelings of joy – if an object can incite those emotions in them, then all the better. Some people go through their whole lives having never loved.

    Reply

  276. Baal
    Feb 18, 2009 @ 17:33:00

    It is a nice story. Not have to rip open the pants hot but still a very nice story and worth reading.

    Reply

  277. Rob
    Feb 19, 2009 @ 17:17:00

    I love love love Annie. I must have listened to that album hundreds of times freshman year. I feel like chewing gum sometimes.

    Reply

  278. Bacteriaburger
    Feb 19, 2009 @ 18:07:00

    Oooo, okay – I need to get that album, yes? That song makes me wanna shake my butt like the girls in the vid.

    Reply

  279. squurt
    Feb 20, 2009 @ 17:50:00

    It did the trick for me. I always let your stories draw me in wherever they lead and where they end up is where I want to be.

    Yes to chubby dicks in clingy shorts!

    Rick

    Reply

  280. squurt
    Feb 20, 2009 @ 20:11:00

    Reminds me of the movie AI. NYC under ice and water.

    Reply

  281. Bacteriaburger
    Feb 21, 2009 @ 08:34:00

    Oooo squurt, I love AI. Probably my favorite Spielberg movie; so fucking creepy.

    “In Dreams” is another one with good drowned-world imagery.

    Reply

  282. arctic_jay
    Feb 21, 2009 @ 15:13:00

    I’m sorry, but shit like this really pisses me off. It’s evidence of a complete delusion concerning how men treat and regard their own gender. If men were so concerned about the health and well-being of their “brothers” there would have never been a draft, male victims of rape and domestic violence would be taken seriously, fathers wouldn’t have trouble gaining custody of their children, circumcision would be outlawed, and a host social roles would be undone.

    The comment doesn’t even make sense. What, aren’t there health and housing issues unrelated to pregnancy and child-rearing that, if universal healthcare were established, men could benefit from? Does she honestly believe that the only reason the government doesn’t provide healthcare is because barefoot and pregnant women might make use of it?

    That comment is incredibly sexist.

    Reply

  283. Bacteriaburger
    Feb 21, 2009 @ 15:39:00

    arctic_jay, You’re barking up the wrong tree again. I have to be honest and say that my opinions aren’t informed enough to spar with you on this one, though I can appreciate that you make some good points.

    Reply

  284. Bacteriaburger
    Feb 21, 2009 @ 21:30:00

    It’s fiction.

    Reply

  285. kserasera
    Feb 21, 2009 @ 22:40:00

    F**k your surreptitious disclaimer. I prefer to believe it happened AND I do.

    Rock ‘n roll.

    Reply

  286. Dwight Supremacy
    Feb 22, 2009 @ 17:28:00

    Hee hee. I sooo remember the Int’l Food coffee commercial. “I loved that waiter … Jean Luc!” Ha. … And they guy tied up one. Hot until the slug things. Ick. ๐Ÿ™‚

    Reply

  287. david
    Feb 22, 2009 @ 21:42:00

    Me too. Why don’t you take all the fucking magic out of the universe?

    Reply

  288. david
    Feb 22, 2009 @ 21:53:00

    I liked it but man it screams vintage Twilight Zone.

    Reply

  289. david
    Feb 22, 2009 @ 22:01:00

    I hate Ocean Shitty. I wish the wild ponies would swim there and conquer that sleazy place.
    ( Rehoboth Beach and Bethany are okay, but they’re protected, being in Bidenland.)

    Reply

  290. david (but not the one that already posted)
    Feb 23, 2009 @ 02:51:00

    Gypsies! Dirty, stinking, thieving gypsies!

    j/k

    Sorry about the racial humor; I’ve been watching a lot of Strangers with Candy lately.

    Reply

  291. Rob
    Feb 25, 2009 @ 11:56:00

    Oh my god the slim suit, you weren’t joking. These pictures are great. Nice bong.

    Reply

  292. Bacteriaburger
    Feb 25, 2009 @ 12:40:00

    Rob,
    Thanks for the comment. However, based on the speed with which we both posted/commented (respectively) on one another’s blog, I have to conclude that we spend entirely too much time on the internet.

    Reply

  293. Bacteriaburger
    Feb 25, 2009 @ 12:54:00

    All of you will kindly blow me

    Reply

  294. Rob
    Feb 26, 2009 @ 13:15:00

    Hahaha… yes… I need a job. ๐Ÿ™

    Reply

  295. david
    Feb 27, 2009 @ 06:31:00

    lol @ the dork pic. You look like you could have been on Ghost Writer. Ah, nostalgia.

    Reply

  296. Rob
    Feb 28, 2009 @ 16:57:00

    Congratulations! Sounds like a fun prostatey read.

    Reply

  297. Rob
    Mar 06, 2009 @ 18:09:00

    “Now let’s shove it up our asses.”

    Reply

  298. Bacteriaburger
    Mar 07, 2009 @ 03:24:00

    The End!

    Reply

  299. Rob
    Mar 15, 2009 @ 00:35:00

    Awesome photo essay, especially the first photo. It’d be even more creepy if I didn’t think it looked like a place they’d film a porno… probably a violent one by raging stallion.

    There used to be an old abandoned place much like this near downtown Houston. Jefferson Davis Hospital. It was built on top of a mass grave where thousands of slaves, yellow fever and cholera victims were dumped. My friends and I were too chicken to go inside when we were there, but we snooped around the grounds. Now they’ve turned the place into artist lofts. I would NOT live there.

    Reply

  300. david
    Mar 17, 2009 @ 01:24:00

    creepy. i’d never go into a place like that; it reminds me of the movie Session 9.

    Reply

  301. david
    Mar 27, 2009 @ 16:28:00

    Possible theories as to what one hears when one calls the number; feel free to contribute.
    ____________________________

    The audio version of Goatse.

    The sound of puppies hitting the pavement after being thrown off of the Empire State Building.

    The synthesized voice of one’s mother telling one how one will never amount to anything and how she only had one to save her marriage.

    The voice of Richard Simmons reading the dirty limericks that are written on a bathroom stall.

    The song stylings of Gilbert Gottfried.

    A recording that only gives bad horoscopes.

    The inner thoughts of Ryan Seacrest.

    The sounds of the last moments of one’s life.

    The sound of two donkeys fucking.

    Reply

  302. Bacteriaburger
    Mar 27, 2009 @ 18:35:00

    My Own Private Crying Number
    would say…

    “Everyone else is having an amazing life while you sit here on the phone.”

    Reply

  303. Rob W.
    Mar 31, 2009 @ 09:32:00

    Showgirls makes my whole body hurt.

    Reply

  304. Bacteriaburger
    Mar 31, 2009 @ 10:22:00

    Yes, plenty of thrashing.

    Reply

  305. Dwight Supremacy
    Apr 01, 2009 @ 03:41:00

    Some friends went to this show as well. Were you one of the guys who got on stage to hug Morrisey? Heheh.

    Reply

  306. Anonymous
    Apr 01, 2009 @ 16:50:00

    I love the celebration of military and nationalism and then the whole Nazi thing. Well done. I wonder how many people notice that reference and then say to themselves “this is the way it should be”? OMG !

    I am going to have to rent it again.

    And isn’t there a shower scene?

    Rick

    Reply

  307. Bacteriaburger
    Apr 01, 2009 @ 17:49:00

    Oh yes, the shower scene is quite lovely. But all in all, nothing makes me feel quite as bleak as “Starship Troopers.”

    Reply

  308. Dwight Supremacy
    Apr 03, 2009 @ 03:11:00

    Starship Trooper … loved. Robocop … classic. Showgirls … have never been able to bring myself to watch it. ๐Ÿ™‚

    Reply

  309. dare
    Apr 03, 2009 @ 20:32:00

    wow, didn’t realize he’s been gone this long. really wish he or someone would let us know what’s up. this guy was the best, so sexy.

    Reply

  310. Mr. M
    Apr 04, 2009 @ 16:35:00

    Showgirls is a camp classic. I still can’t watch it all the way through without fast forwarding at least seven or eight times but it gave us the line, “She has two emotions: staring, and kicking.” So it had earned its place in history.

    Reply

  311. scott
    Apr 08, 2009 @ 13:13:00

    “where judgment is withheld in favor of orgasms” LOL! You tickle me!

    Reply

  312. scott
    Apr 08, 2009 @ 14:03:00

    I’ll have what he’s having.

    Reply

  313. Dwight Supremacy
    Apr 12, 2009 @ 22:15:00

    LOL! I am definitely savoring the Sienna Miller digs. As well as the digs at the movie as a whole, as the gay has reportedly been pared down greatly.

    Reply

  314. Dwight Supremacy
    Apr 12, 2009 @ 22:17:00

    Ha. That line is classic. Cannot wait to read the story! Hee hee.

    Reply

  315. david
    Apr 20, 2009 @ 20:44:00

    I don’t know how to feel about this. My first impression was wtf but the more pics I saw the more I became confused.

    Am I looking at the dreams of a man, his view of reality, or the insanity of a man? If someone were to see my dreams or view of reality in physical form (paintings, statuary, ect…) would it be insanity to them?

    Reply

  316. Rob W.
    Apr 26, 2009 @ 13:18:00

    I think the U.S. infection rate is much higher than reported. They say 20 confirmed in the U.S. so far, but I think it’s closer to 200. The real numbers will start coming to light over the next five days.

    If the mortality rate is 8.5% (81 deaths in Mexico out of 1000) then we will see more deaths in the next two weeks depending on how resistant the virus is to current antiviral treatment. It’s still too early to gauge if this situation is worse than SARS. I’m going to say worse.

    Sorry, I didn’t help, did I?

    Reply

  317. Bacteriaburger
    Apr 26, 2009 @ 17:02:00

    I’m just taking heart in the fact that I’ve never had the flu [KNOCKS ON ENORMOUS PIECE OF WOOD].

    Or wait…maybe that makes my chances even worse.

    Reply

  318. crake
    Apr 28, 2009 @ 12:56:00

    calm your ass down, sir.
    so long as this “swine flu” thing isnt communicable via felching, im not worried.

    –j.

    Reply

  319. jaylo8891
    Apr 29, 2009 @ 07:05:00

    hi!

    don’t worry, sir. i don’t think you’ll be swined flu or swine flued or…whatever. with vigelance such as yours, i think it would be enough to keep you safe from it. don’t think too much about it, cause if you do, your endorphine secretion will decrease and your oncogenic cells increase — the next thing you know, you have cancer.

    anyway, (i’m not sure if i’m in the right site to say this) i’m a fan of your erotic stories. i read most of them in bacteriaburger.com.

    keep safe! c”,)

    Reply

  320. Anonymous
    May 03, 2009 @ 08:51:00

    love it. expecialy the part(looked like it had never been used) . gave me a stiffy

    Reply

  321. Rob
    May 03, 2009 @ 11:01:00

    No I had not seen/heard this. It’s incredible! I facebooked it. Yes, this guy is aesthetically pleasing… looks and talent-wise.

    Reply

  322. Bacteriaburger
    May 03, 2009 @ 12:58:00

    The juxtaposition of the music with the images of all these people in their bedrooms/alone, all brought together; it’s sort of haunting.

    Reply

  323. Dwight Supremacy
    May 05, 2009 @ 18:36:00

    Oh, that is neat! And he is cute. ๐Ÿ™‚

    Reply

  324. Rob W.
    May 09, 2009 @ 10:31:00

    I love Air! 10,000Hz Legend is my favorite album.

    Reply

  325. Bacteriaburger
    May 09, 2009 @ 14:40:00

    Oh god bless you Rob. 10khz is unfairly maligned by Air fans, but it’s probably my favorite too. It’s like jam-packed with music.

    Reply

  326. Anonymous
    May 11, 2009 @ 19:07:00

    Natty, does this mean you’re gonna offer your services to this hard (very hard) up man?

    Reply

  327. david
    May 13, 2009 @ 23:20:00

    I saw this but I didn’t bother watching it because I didn’t think it would be funny. Boy was I wrong!

    Reply

  328. Rob W.
    May 19, 2009 @ 08:10:00

    I love the original commercials and I love this and I love the original commercials even more now because they’re fucking ridiculous.

    Reply

  329. Bacteriaburger
    May 19, 2009 @ 16:06:55

    Yeah, the Corn Syrup Council really has their shame tactics down.

    Reply

  330. crake
    May 26, 2009 @ 00:28:28

    i’d buy that for a dollar

    Reply

  331. Bernard Welt
    May 27, 2009 @ 13:34:59

    Holy moly.
    BTW I’m collecting a whole lot of older (like 1910-1930s) boys’ books for their bizarre homoerotic illustrations. Yum.

    Reply

  332. Bacteriaburger
    May 27, 2009 @ 14:51:14

    That sounds great!

    Reply

  333. Jamie
    May 29, 2009 @ 17:16:35

    This was beautifully written. But alas in this world it fell between two stools (and I don’t mean a Churchillian crap)
    It led us beautifully into the erotic only to have the absurdity of the ultimate coupling – however real and we’ve all been there – but it is so completely anti-romantic and consequently deflationary cock-wise in the end

    Reply

  334. david
    May 31, 2009 @ 00:17:40

    lol @ Greg and Joey watching where in the world is carmen sandiego.

    Reply

  335. david
    Jun 02, 2009 @ 03:26:45

    Pornography is destroying everything…

    All is going according to plan. Muahahahahaa!

    Reply

  336. Rob W.
    Jun 03, 2009 @ 20:57:29

    Your story is hysterically hot. "It would certainly make a nice bulge in his Abercrombie cargos, thought Kevin." That had me in stitches.

    I think the latest manscaping craze is a riot, mostly because they're indelicate commercial appeals to penis insecurity. I wouldn't be surprised if it was all a thinly veiled mission by gay personal product executives executing an elaborate homoerotic joke on our culture.

    I've never shaved my pubes before. I don't say that as some sort of badge of masculinity, I'm just afraid of itching since I have really sensitive skin. I need SoftOilยฎ

    Reply

  337. Bacteriaburger
    Jun 03, 2009 @ 22:15:22

    Thanks, Rob. Yours is the first comment I've got and i'm glad you appreciated the humor. It's a fact that I have a shaving fetish and a general attraction to douchebags and their accoutrements (cologne, bikini briefs, etc). I like body hair too, don't get me wrong. But there's something about men who spend time on their appearance, it's some weird gender mindfuck that hits me where it counts.

    I feel like these companies are taking advantage of a market that already exists, and who know why the douchebags feel that body hair is so disgusting? Where do notions of beauty come from? Fashion? I don't know.

    I probably last shaved my pubes when I was in high school. Never again, man that sucked.

    Reply

  338. Anonymous
    Jun 04, 2009 @ 15:23:11

    Hilarious and hot – another great story man.

    Reply

  339. Anonymous
    Jun 17, 2009 @ 12:50:59

    I couldn't agree more! This sort of condescension (with a trace of vitriol just below the surface) is all too commom among gays on the web these days.

    Reply

  340. david
    Jun 20, 2009 @ 22:47:50

    hey, cut him some slack; artists are supposed to be temperamental. lol

    Reply

  341. Rob W.
    Jun 21, 2009 @ 19:59:08

    My roommate is an art history major. Thomas Kinkade is her personal Satan. I read a very similar article in Modern Painters magazine a while back that was called something like "America's Most Wanted: Thomas Kinkade." And reflected on the same incidents that make him sound like a lurid drunken hypocrite.

    I think there is someone who does parodies of him, like paints those idyllic cottages engulfed in a rainbow of wildflowers and then puts a little Nazi flag somewhere.

    Reply

  342. Bacteriaburger
    Jun 23, 2009 @ 10:40:49

    David, I guess if I'd sold millions in dumb assed paintings I'd feel the right to piss anywhere I wanted as well. haha

    Rob – Those parodies you mention make me think of Banksy. It's weird about Thomas Kinkade, like SOOO MANY people like him there must be some value to what he does, right? Maybe not.

    Reply

  343. crake
    Jun 23, 2009 @ 18:14:58

    i wasn't expecting to, but i liked this. a couple of the posts had me laughing to the point of tears.

    –j.

    Reply

  344. david
    Jun 30, 2009 @ 05:30:18

    Ed McMahon, farrah fawcett, michael jackson, billy mays. Why the hell are all these celebs dying at the same time?

    Reply

  345. William
    Jul 01, 2009 @ 04:21:41

    believe it or not, this took this old man back to his younger days..and those days were so full of fear..hated to come back to Queensland every time wife and I went south…she even suggested we should move.

    Reply

  346. david
    Jul 10, 2009 @ 00:26:44

    2:30-2:41 "It's Oprah's Favorite Things!"

    Reply

  347. Anonymous
    Jul 10, 2009 @ 18:59:43

    This is the weirdest shit I have ever seen!

    Reply

  348. Anonymous
    Jul 23, 2009 @ 22:05:20

    When pleasure remains, it no longer remains a pleasure.

    Reply

  349. Rob W.
    Jul 25, 2009 @ 21:31:24

    I like this a lot. This guy fits my aesthetic. Thanks for directing me to him.

    Reply

  350. Bacteriaburger
    Jul 26, 2009 @ 10:12:25

    Cool

    Reply

  351. david
    Aug 07, 2009 @ 05:20:16

    thanks for the nightmares I'm going to have now that I remember those goddamn robotic animals that were at showbiz and chuck e cheese.

    Reply

  352. Bacteriaburger
    Aug 07, 2009 @ 07:45:25

    You are so welcome David!

    Reply

  353. crake
    Aug 10, 2009 @ 20:15:03

    i dig how he had his pant legs tucked into his ultra futuristic high top sneakers.

    Reply

  354. david
    Aug 11, 2009 @ 00:34:49

    thanks for the new song to add to my shatner collection.

    Reply

  355. Anonymous
    Aug 13, 2009 @ 20:03:00

    Donnie and I would get along quite well.

    Rick

    Reply

  356. Bacteriaburger
    Aug 14, 2009 @ 06:22:07

    Yeah, he seems like a good guy. ๐Ÿ™‚

    Reply

  357. Anonymous
    Aug 16, 2009 @ 09:37:44

    Congratulations! I really look forward to reading this!

    Reply

  358. Bacteriaburger
    Aug 16, 2009 @ 18:46:50

    Thanks! Glad to know people are into it. Really, I started this thing over two YEARS ago, but only in the past six months did I get really serious about finishing it. It's not even very long, but I'm glad with how it came out.

    Reply

  359. Rob
    Aug 23, 2009 @ 01:58:19

    hey! I just got back from Vegas and saw you posted this. I'm such a bad blogger. But did you see my Nightcharm piece on gay for pay? It was agonizing to write. I'm burned out after watching Tyra Banks clips repeatedly on youtube trying to study Kurt Wild's facial expressions and his inner psyche.

    Reply

  360. Rob W.
    Aug 23, 2009 @ 01:59:54

    That is awesome to hear. I hope to read it soon, bound and all prettied up.

    Reply

  361. Rob (part 2)
    Aug 23, 2009 @ 02:08:00

    Also, I'm happy you understand me Natty and can spell my name. In reviews people keep calling me Ron. People fuck up my real name all the time so I tried to pick a simple pseudonym and yet this issue follows me. I don't really mind. I like Rons, but it's fucking up my google cred! And where the fuck do you find these pics? Facebook? Does that guy have the Mitsubishi logo tattooed on his arm? Twice? Does that really matter if my face is buried in his likely low, dangling balls? So many questions…

    Reply

  362. Bacteriaburger
    Aug 23, 2009 @ 10:32:47

    Thanks Rob!

    Reply

  363. Bacteriaburger
    Aug 23, 2009 @ 10:41:12

    I did read your Nightcharm piece and I thought it was really good, especially how it threw the whole "gays who lust after str8 men are self-hating"-argument out the window.

    Good call on the Mitsubishi logo. What a mystery. I'm sure his balls are low and dangly, though. And smell like fresh bread.

    Reply

  364. Anonymous
    Aug 23, 2009 @ 21:12:03

    I know its gonna be good. Cant wait to see it published and you will have a guarenteed buyer out of me. I actually clicked on the wikilink of the Winesburg, Ohio to find out more about and actually read it on the American Literature site. It was a good story indeed and I can see why it is a classic. Hope your story comes off like that just in a more hornier and porny sense.

    Reply

  365. Anonymous
    Aug 24, 2009 @ 19:26:11

    I don't like these dry spells ๐Ÿ™

    Reply

  366. david
    Sep 07, 2009 @ 05:17:42

    I love this guy's work.

    Reply

  367. Anonymous
    Sep 14, 2009 @ 12:17:06

    You're a terrific writer. What's changed is the medium. At the risk of sounding glib: 'Twas ever thus.' I think the ongoing work of writers like you will eventually find its way to another format or forum. I can certainly understand the shock, but I truly believe that you are too talented not to find a new medium or form. Keep writing and keep believing in your work! There are a lot of readers out here who do!

    Reply

  368. Rob
    Oct 08, 2009 @ 06:20:17

    I love your collages, they have a menacing occult quality. They remind me of Boards of Canada who do similar nostalgia/occult themes in their music.

    I'm really ignorant of the publishing world, but I have high hopes for you too. Can't wait to read it.

    Reply

  369. Bacteriaburger
    Oct 08, 2009 @ 06:51:57

    Awww, thanks Rob, that made me smile. I love Boards of Canada, wonder if we'll get more music from them in the near future.

    Reply

  370. crake
    Oct 08, 2009 @ 17:11:29

    whoa.
    uhm, awesome? yes, AWESOME.

    Reply

  371. Bacteriaburger
    Oct 08, 2009 @ 18:34:33

    Thanks magic J-bone!

    Reply

  372. Dwight Supremacy
    Oct 09, 2009 @ 04:22:02

    Thank goodness for those last two lines. I was feeling so depressing for you. Yeah, things do seem like they will get tougher, but your positive outlook will aid you in changing with the times and getting through this rough patch.

    Reply

  373. Dwight Supremacy
    Oct 09, 2009 @ 04:23:46

    I saw that the other day. It DEFINITELY grabs my eye! I think I may have to join the site to watch it. ;P

    Reply

  374. Dwight Supremacy
    Oct 09, 2009 @ 04:24:45

    These are great, especially the one where the woman is having the milk poured on her. Tickles me.

    Reply

  375. Dwight Supremacy
    Oct 10, 2009 @ 07:17:31

    These collages ARE awesome. Coolness! … And, whichever route it takes to get your book published, I'm there when it hits the shelves. ๐Ÿ™‚

    Reply

  376. crake
    Oct 16, 2009 @ 23:05:32

    yay!

    Reply

  377. Rob W.
    Oct 19, 2009 @ 06:57:04

    It's excellent because when I see guys like this at the bar doing jagerbombs, this is what I imagine happens later.

    Reply

  378. Bacteriaburger
    Oct 19, 2009 @ 08:03:36

    Thanks J-bone!!

    Rob, *sigh*, me too, obviously. I only wish I could have found a better photo to accompany the story but this was the best I could come up with when I googled "club douchebags".

    Reply

  379. Rony
    Oct 19, 2009 @ 21:53:44

    Actually when I see the picture I think it kinda of matches up more to the story Morning After IMO anyways.

    Reply

  380. Bacteriaburger
    Oct 20, 2009 @ 08:46:29

    Yeah I hear that Rony, though (interesting fact alert) I based those "Morning After" characters on these fellas (link nsfw) specifically.

    Reply

  381. Rob
    Nov 09, 2009 @ 07:12:08

    oh my god. I was waiting to see some fishing but it never came… or did it? haha, can't wait to see this.

    Reply

  382. Bacteriaburger
    Nov 09, 2009 @ 14:26:54

    It's a teaser trailer, see? If you want to see hot fishing action you have to buy it and watch the whole thing.

    Reply

  383. Anonymous
    Nov 11, 2009 @ 23:04:58

    Reply

  384. Bacteriaburger
    Nov 12, 2009 @ 08:57:23

    Fascinating. Thanks, anonymous.

    Reply

  385. Dessilyn
    Nov 14, 2009 @ 13:10:29

    Incredible photos. After all of the rumors about the place being torn down, it's good to see recent activity at the place. We've been there three times before, and it's always a damn good trip each time. People always exact some sort of hype out of this place, but just to say it's creepy and unearthly is quite enough, and the most true statements above any bullshit.

    Thanks for the pictures! I hope that one of these days you get through it at night, including the basement, most certainly. I'd suggest taking a small group (4-10 people) just so you don't get too lost or panicked ๐Ÿ˜‰

    Reply

  386. Dwight Supremacy
    Nov 19, 2009 @ 03:30:29

    I didn't know this was the one you co-wrote. Awesomeness! I've been drooling over this and now have even more reason to see it. ๐Ÿ™‚

    Reply

  387. Dwight Supremacy
    Nov 19, 2009 @ 03:33:48

    LOL! I must watch this. I remember the first "Troll" fondly in my childhood mind's eye.

    Reply

  388. Bacteriaburger
    Nov 19, 2009 @ 10:47:20

    Oh great, Dwight. Hope you enjoy.

    Reply

  389. Bacteriaburger
    Nov 19, 2009 @ 10:48:21

    Thanks Dessilyn. It's kind of a shame but the place is getting a lot of news attention recently, which makes me wonder if its days are limited. That would be a tragedy but it almost seems inevitable.

    Reply

  390. Anonymous
    Nov 19, 2009 @ 22:12:55

    Do father and son get it on?

    Reply

  391. Bacteriaburger
    Nov 20, 2009 @ 07:29:02

    Nope. Not my decision, mind you.

    Reply

  392. david
    Nov 21, 2009 @ 20:23:17

    What if you need something that works the other way? What if you need to "cool your tool"?

    Reply

  393. david
    Nov 21, 2009 @ 20:33:52

    Natty, have you read Samuel Delany's Bread and Wine, a graphic novel about his affair with a homeless man. It's very funky and tender and intense and probably out of print.
    The word verification is skiwad, a sexual sniglet if ever there was one.

    Reply

  394. Rob W.
    Nov 22, 2009 @ 21:48:37

    god from the creasing it looks like it is barely contained, waiting to burst through his l.l. bean pants. that is epic. this commercial should be called ass in a box.

    Reply

  395. Bacteriaburger
    Nov 23, 2009 @ 07:51:58

    hahaha ass in a box…but seriously, it should be called that.

    I love that the next shot is the lady wither her finger on her chin, like she's contemplating the ass.

    Reply

  396. david
    Nov 23, 2009 @ 20:00:23

    "contemplating the ass"

    lol.

    Reply

  397. Dwight Supremacy
    Dec 01, 2009 @ 18:12:45

    Yeah, a Josman illustration would be cool. But I must say, that description has me hot to read that story!

    Reply

  398. Dwight Supremacy
    Dec 01, 2009 @ 18:14:38

    tee hee. nice.

    Reply

  399. Bacteriaburger
    Dec 02, 2009 @ 09:55:10

    Thanks Dwight!

    Reply

  400. st. pete cub
    Dec 02, 2009 @ 15:28:56

    Congrats! I look forward to reading it.

    Reply

  401. st. pete cub
    Dec 02, 2009 @ 15:31:41

    The trailer is fantastic…great job. I can't wait to watch the whole thing. Dad is HOT!

    Reply

  402. crake
    Dec 04, 2009 @ 00:08:55

    i emailed josman to tell him of your interest, and added a link to this blog post in the message. lemme know if it works out, yo.

    –j.

    Reply

  403. Bacteriaburger
    Dec 04, 2009 @ 10:56:33

    Whoa, thanks J! I've contacted Josman in the past, just telling him i like his stuff, but i've never had the balls to solicit him. Thanks for doing it for me!

    Reply

  404. Bacteriaburger
    Dec 04, 2009 @ 10:58:46

    thanks st.pete cub! Yeah, the whole thing's available now, i guess i should have mentioned that…

    Reply

  405. Anonymous
    Dec 20, 2009 @ 10:26:52

    Hey, that music's really cool. Thanks for letting me know about it.

    Reply

  406. jkrs
    Dec 20, 2009 @ 14:45:32

    w00t!

    Reply

  407. natty
    Dec 20, 2009 @ 14:51:43

    *puts hands in air, waves like he just doesn’t care*

    Reply

  408. Johnny Murdoc
    Dec 20, 2009 @ 17:14:38

    Nice job on redesign, man. I especially love the functionality of the story tags, I might have to steal that one from you when I redesign my own site/blog.

    Reply

  409. Johnny Murdoc
    Dec 20, 2009 @ 17:15:42

    By the way, that should have been “on the redesign.” It’s always fun to catch that kind of thing after you click “submit.”

    Reply

  410. Anonymous
    Dec 22, 2009 @ 02:56:13

    yeah, you really do need to see District 9, btw. A decent story, excellent special effects (better than that damn Avatar movie), and a really hot actor playing the lead. Or, I thought he was hot, at least.

    Reply

  411. natty
    Dec 22, 2009 @ 07:39:34

    Yes. I want to see it.

    Reply

  412. natty
    Dec 25, 2009 @ 19:26:15

    Thanks Rob! I wasn’t faulting you for defecting, your new blog is hella snazzy.

    Reply

  413. Anonymous
    Dec 28, 2009 @ 23:59:17

    I voted for uncle barry, but actually I think your hottest story was the one about the biology lesson.

    Reply

  414. Anonymous
    Dec 29, 2009 @ 00:07:23

    That’s hot. You should see the photo they put up for x-mas eve. I practically creamed my khaki’s just looking at it.

    Reply

  415. natty
    Dec 29, 2009 @ 10:04:21

    Thanks anonymous

    Reply

  416. natty
    Dec 29, 2009 @ 10:04:48

    Yeah that was a good one too.

    Reply

  417. David Abbott
    Dec 29, 2009 @ 10:08:10

    I agree with what Annonymous says, I think that the biology lesson was one of the hottest stories that I have ever read, I get off every time I read it. Would love to read more like that.
    Dave, in Ashtabula, Ohio.

    Reply

  418. Natty
    Dec 29, 2009 @ 10:14:46

    Thanks Dave, glad you liked it. Hmmm if I could recommend a story to you it would be “Practice Makes Perfect,” which is full-on Dad/Son incest but features the teacher/student/sexual lesson dynamic present in “Biology Lesson.” Give it a try.

    Reply

  419. Dwight Supremacy
    Dec 29, 2009 @ 10:31:52

    I’m so behind on checking out my fave blogs I’m just getting to see this! Awesome new site! I’m psyched to explore. ๐Ÿ™‚ โ€ฆ Also I was just in the dirty bookstore (hehe) picking up a mag and saw a few “Handjobs” there, but couldn’t remember what issue “Biology Lesson” was in and couldn’t remember the title at the time.

    Reply

  420. Dwight Supremacy
    Dec 29, 2009 @ 10:34:06

    lol. oh brother.

    Reply

  421. Natty
    Dec 29, 2009 @ 14:45:41

    Hey Dwight! Good to see ya. If you look on the back cover of any Handjobs they list the title of each story. You know, just in case you find yourself in the dirty bookstore again – not that you would, but just in case…

    Reply

  422. Ronny P.
    Dec 30, 2009 @ 17:17:53

    I cant wait to read Backwoods if and when it gets published. Maybe you should post it on your website and see how it goes. I am sure that you have a strong fan base (me included) that would gladly purchase a electronic book or secured pdf format of your book. Anyways i love your other stories and cant wait to see you write and post more hot stories on the site.

    Reply

    • Natty
      Dec 30, 2009 @ 19:17:25

      Thanks, Ronny! Self-publishing is a definite option if nothing else comes through, and it’s nice to know there are people like you out there who are interested. I’m sort of playing it by ear for the time being. Glad you like the stories, man!

      Reply

  423. Aries Eros
    Dec 31, 2009 @ 22:54:46

    hello i was trying to vote for practice makes perfect. but was unable to vote. i read this story a while back. but always come back to it. it may be the hottest thing that i have ever read.

    Reply

    • Natty
      Jan 01, 2010 @ 13:20:59

      Aries, I checked the log and your vote was indeed counted. I deleted all of your multiple comments. Please don’t do that again. I’m really glad you like the story.

      Reply

  424. Steve
    Dec 31, 2009 @ 23:37:49

    First off, congratulations that you’re work made it direct to DVD. That’s pretty freakin’ awesome.

    However, I’m with David in saying that DVD’s aren’t adequate compensation. That DVD will make thousands, and so should you. You wrote the script, you get the royalties. The quality of the work and your intention to sell it are beside the point. It was obviously good enough to steal and rebrand for production through his company.

    Also, I would talk with another lawyer. Even though you didn’t register it through the Library of Congress, Nifty should be able to provide you with an affidavit stating that your story was published on their site on such-and-such date. Also, a sworn statement from you that Joe admitted it was your story would also go a long way in a civil suit.

    I realize that you probably don’t want to make waves in the industry you’re looking to work in, and I totally get that. I just don’t think it’s right for good writers to get screwed.

    • Natty
      Jan 01, 2010 @ 13:18:09

      Steve,

      As you may have read from the top of the post, this was a repost from March of 2007, so I’m sort of past the whole thing. But just to clarify: I did not write the script to this movie. The dialogue from one of my stories was used as dialogue for one scene. Also, the issue with suing isn’t providing proof that my work appeared prior to the film – it’s that I’d need to prove I lost out on money from the work being used without my permission. Which…I published the story on Nifty. For free. So I really can’t prove that.

      What I got out of the whole thing was that Joe Gage used my work in another film, for which I got attribution, and that’s fine with me. I appreciate your concern but please respect the fact that I’m fine with the outcome of the whole situation.

      N.

  425. Sera Sera
    Jan 02, 2010 @ 22:07:48

    I’m sure you’ll have a difficult time guessing which one I voted for… You still owe me a story by the way. Two if I wanna be a cunt about it. *laugh*

    Reply

  426. Natty
    Jan 03, 2010 @ 06:45:54

    Oh Sera, thank you for voting, I have no doubt it was for Daddy. And I know, I’m terrible about promising stories and not delivering. blargh.

    Reply

  427. Natty
    Jan 03, 2010 @ 06:46:50

    I’m going to write a story called “Bronze My Hole.” Not really though.

    Reply

  428. Steve
    Jan 03, 2010 @ 17:55:08

    Yo My Brother’s Buddy Tony, I’m really happy for you, I’m going to let you have your sequel, but Dr. Craig had one of the best sequels of all time…one of the best sequels of all time!

    On a side note, I didn’t even see “My Brother’s Buddy Tony” in the list of stories to vote for. Did you confuse it for My Sister’s Boyfriend Joey? Or should I shut up and pretend I didn’t notice that?

    Reply

  429. Natty
    Jan 03, 2010 @ 18:00:04

    Steve, the answer to your question is that I’m a dumb-ass who can’t even keep his meager excuse for porn story titles straight, probably because they’re so goddamn similar because I suck at coming up with them. I fixed it and thanks for pointing it out.

    And thank you Kanye, your opinion is noted. “Dr. Craig” was at the top for a while there, and I was really sweating it cause I could not think of a way to extend the lives of those characters. The only reason I added it to the poll was as a favor the reader who’d inspired the idea of a reader-based poll in the first place. I mean, I would’ve come up with something had it won, but what? Give me a good enough idea and I just might pursue it.

    Reply

  430. whey
    Jan 03, 2010 @ 18:21:47

    “Ideally youโ€™re too busy jacking off.” Or, buzzing one off for your female readers.

    Reply

  431. Natty
    Jan 03, 2010 @ 18:23:16

    Hot shit I love my female readers! Thanks for the shout-out and correction/refinement, whey!

    Reply

  432. HomoSuperior
    Jan 04, 2010 @ 00:41:56

    Natty, long time reader, first time commenter. I feel badly that you didn’t know that you had so many readers. Honestly, everytime I’m planning on jerking off, the first website I hit is BacteriaBuger. By some odd cosmological occurence we share all the same kinks, and I have yet to meet a story of yours that hasn’t made me cum. You’re incredibly talented and all I can ask for is more frequent updates, and for you to start writing for porn studios officially, screw joe gage. you’ve got more talent by far…

    Love and Hugs,
    HomoSuperior

    Reply

  433. Natty
    Jan 04, 2010 @ 08:07:10

    HomoSuperior, That is weird that we share the same kinks, but I couldn’t hope for anything more. I would really like to write more scripts, but it just doesn’t seem to be in the cards, or I don’t know how to get into it. At this point I’m just grateful to have an audience from you guys, because the outlets for my writing are dwindling by the day.

    Reply

  434. jkrs
    Jan 05, 2010 @ 14:04:25

    uhm… is that doggie squeezin’ one out??

    Reply

  435. jkrs
    Jan 05, 2010 @ 14:07:46

    i also voted for “My Sisterโ€™s Boyfriend Joey”.
    ’tis one of your best, sir.

    Reply

  436. Natty
    Jan 05, 2010 @ 15:55:52

    Could be, Jakers. The explanation the car salesman gave me for this drawing was that IF the dog had been paying attention, the rabbit wouldn’t have entered the garden. Makes a sort of sense, but it’s still weird.

    Reply

  437. Natty
    Jan 05, 2010 @ 15:56:32

    Thanks buddy.

    Reply

  438. Johnny
    Jan 07, 2010 @ 11:41:03

    I had no idea such a genre existed…

    I’m a sucker for pulp science fiction covers, and at a good book fair I’ll buy entirely too many books because their covers are pretty.

    Reply

  439. Natty
    Jan 07, 2010 @ 12:45:04

    Johnny, it’s a weird genre, to be sure. And I love those pulp sci-fi covers too. I’ve got some good old Bradbury paperbacks.

    Reply

  440. david
    Jan 07, 2010 @ 13:40:00

    D-: wtf?

    Reply

  441. Steve
    Jan 07, 2010 @ 21:11:31

    this reminds me of a game i used to own.

    http://images.boardgamegeek.com/images/pic31442_lg.jpg

    Reply

    • Natty
      Jan 07, 2010 @ 21:23:50

      That looks like a blast, Steve!

      Reply

  442. jkrs
    Jan 08, 2010 @ 03:09:00

    yeah, it is kinda strange. i love the detail in work like this – it just deserves to be stared at. i’ve sniffed around the image a bit but can’t make out a name, or initials, printed anywhere on it.
    :/
    also, i can’t help but keep noticing that one of the little boulders(?) beneath the giant IF resembles a disembodied sparrow’s head.
    –j.

    Reply

  443. Natty
    Jan 08, 2010 @ 07:48:04

    Whoa, I totally see that.

    Reply

  444. Dwight Supremacy
    Jan 08, 2010 @ 08:30:11

    “Mother, Please Don’t Die” cracks me up!

    Reply

  445. Rick
    Jan 08, 2010 @ 13:20:14

    Hmm. I seem to recall a post where “that” was gonna no longer be around the house. Oh yeah, that was the old blog and this is the new blog, nevermind ๐Ÿ™‚

    Reply

  446. Natty
    Jan 08, 2010 @ 13:48:00

    The family favorite is the awful song/video, not what it’s celebrating. ๐Ÿ™‚

    Reply

  447. Dwight Supremacy
    Jan 08, 2010 @ 14:14:28

    lol. Allure, which I see all the time. It really is depressing.

    Reply

    • Natty
      Jan 08, 2010 @ 19:24:27

      I know, right? I can’t imagine who shops there.

      Reply

  448. Dwight Supremacy
    Jan 08, 2010 @ 14:16:27

    LOL. Just read “Biology Lesson.” Swoon. I have a couple teachers I pictured during that read. Hot.

    Reply

    • Natty
      Jan 08, 2010 @ 19:24:03

      Thanks Dwight!

      Reply

  449. Natty
    Jan 09, 2010 @ 06:57:03

    Let me know what you find, Rob.

    Reply

  450. Sera Sera
    Jan 09, 2010 @ 13:40:12

    Oh my goodness! I must get in on this!

    Reply

  451. whey
    Jan 10, 2010 @ 14:02:54

    That’s just a trip. What happened to the people? Based on some of those items in the wardrobe, they abandoned the house in the 70s.

    Reply

  452. whey
    Jan 10, 2010 @ 14:16:33

    As one of your female readers (this is one of the first places I visit, too, for 100% satisfaction), who adores your writing and can’t comprehend that you aren’t already being published by the online gay romance publishers, I realized, hell, you may not even know about it. I don’t think you’ll be able to retire, but I would imagine with your talents, you’d get a rabid following fairly soon. (As far as I’m concerned, “My Straight Buddy Scott” is ready for release — just need a little romance mush w/a HEA (Happy Ever After, i.e., they fall in lurve and ride off into the sunset)). If you’re not familiar with the publishers, I’d recommend Loose ID, Torquere Press, Samhain, MLR.

    Reply

  453. Natty
    Jan 10, 2010 @ 17:20:55

    whey – There were a lot of abandoned farmhouses around that area. My guess was that, after the owners died, the house went to relatives who just didn’t care and let the houses rot. Having had a better look at those clothes, I’d date them from the sixties. That place was a trip.

    Reply

  454. Natty
    Jan 10, 2010 @ 17:29:05

    whey,

    You’re kind of blowing my mind. I mean, I’d always sort of known that there was a market for gay romance but it honestly never occurred to me that I might fit in there. And I’d heard of Torquere Press but I hadn’t looked into it much. In particular, the Loose ID page got me excited – especially all that talk about how much money they are making! That’s not something you read about much in publishing. But it makes sense to me.

    I’m wondering if you could recommend a particular title or give me more info on what you, personally, enjoy. This is all so over my head but it’s fascinating. Feel free to email me: bacteriaburger(at)gmail(dot)com.

    And thanks!

    Reply

  455. david
    Jan 11, 2010 @ 07:22:12

    What’s with the files and the books? did you look through any of the files?

    Reply

  456. Natty
    Jan 11, 2010 @ 09:04:46

    david – The books were all law books, and the files seemed to be similar, law files. They were interesting, but not that interesting.

    Reply

  457. Steve
    Jan 12, 2010 @ 13:03:38

    yeah, stupid, boring, law books… i would have taken every last one. because i have a problem. :/

    Reply

  458. david
    Jan 14, 2010 @ 07:51:38

    I think the dog is having an attack of the dry heaves after licking the gleeful but poison daubed bunny.

    Reply

  459. Dwight Supremacy
    Jan 14, 2010 @ 19:24:22

    Yeah, really! I am not sure I’ve ever seen anyone in there. And I don’t know when it is even open! I hope it is a front for something illicit. That would at least be less depressing!

    Reply

  460. weboy
    Jan 16, 2010 @ 07:36:41

    “Lurlene McDaniel”? That’s possibly the most awesome author name ever!

    Reply

  461. Natty
    Jan 16, 2010 @ 10:26:04

    I know, doesn’t it sound like it should be in the lyrics to a Dolly Parton song?

    Reply

  462. Dwight Supremacy
    Jan 19, 2010 @ 14:14:24

    LOL! Love it.

    Reply

  463. Dwight Supremacy
    Jan 19, 2010 @ 14:55:12

    I like how he shaved a year off as he went (seemingly) without getting rimmed longer and longer.

    Reply

  464. Natty
    Jan 19, 2010 @ 16:31:33

    I know. What could a switch from 25 to 24 possibly provide? He’s such a mystery.

    It pains me because I know I’m the one for him, the one he’s searching for, but my faithfulness to my bf keeps us apart. It’s JUST like Romeo & Juliet.

    Reply

  465. Steve
    Jan 19, 2010 @ 21:18:27

    really good article. now i have to go buy “no logo.” i especially like how she points out how completely hypocritical obama is, despite some of us hoping for actual change. it’s quite disheartening to know that no politician, not one, is there for the people. kinda makes me want to rally friends and start calling our congressman and at least making our voices heard. on the other hand, kinda makes me wanna take a nap.

    Reply

  466. Steve
    Jan 19, 2010 @ 22:38:06

    What did you think of the masculinities series specifically? Most of the comments were either cliche, or kinda dumb. The marine who cusses and has tattoos, the guy who works out and he’s a guy, therefore, he’s masculine… I get that he’s portraying a word that has become so many different things to so many different people. I get the redefining gender aspect… I don’t know… Thought it was a bit trite. I liked the cruising pictures, though. The woods were beautiful and it amazes me that people still do that…

    Reply

  467. Sera Sera
    Jan 19, 2010 @ 22:45:17

    My sympathies regarding Rim Guy. I too have a lost CL love.

    Reply

  468. Natty
    Jan 20, 2010 @ 11:07:57

    Steve, I enjoyed the comments. I liked that the artist had those people speak for themselves, and in some instances what they had to say was sort of academic and thought out, while in other cases it was blunt and took the idea of masculinity for granted. That’s where I think the cliche aspect came in, just this idea that a man is what he is and to question what it means is kinda…gay.

    Reply

  469. jkrs
    Jan 22, 2010 @ 03:59:02

    Natty, that link is kinda janky – it directs to “www.toddheisler.c/”

    –j.

    Reply

  470. Natty
    Jan 22, 2010 @ 07:18:58

    Oops, fixed it. Thx.

    Reply

  471. Johnny Murdoc
    Jan 23, 2010 @ 20:15:00

    It looks like the work of Benoรฎt Prรฉvot (http://www.benoitprevot.com/). He has a comic out from Class Comics called Angelface (http://www.classcomics.com/minisite/angelface/) that’s absolutely gorgeous. The signature doesn’t quite look like his, except he uses the same accent in his signature, and his signature has changed a couple of times.

    Reply

  472. Drub
    Jan 23, 2010 @ 21:25:45

    That’s one heck of an illustration! :D~
    Congrats on the story being included in Best Gay Erotica 2010!

    Reply

  473. david
    Jan 24, 2010 @ 00:14:49

    No! Not Jigglypuff! Why did they corrupt Jigglypuff?

    Reply

  474. Steve
    Jan 24, 2010 @ 04:02:08

    i think johnny’s right. if you scale up the image on this one the signatures are almost identical. it looks like it says prevot 07. you have a great eye, johnny.

    Reply

  475. homocomix
    Jan 24, 2010 @ 04:33:00

    yup, it must be Benoรฎt Prรฉvot, this accent circumflex above this signature denotes him. And I suppose this character after “t” must be ’04 and not “a”.
    Thanx for all the references!
    โ™ฅ
    hx

    Reply

  476. Natty
    Jan 24, 2010 @ 10:49:25

    I’m convinced it’s him, too. Thanks guys! (And homocomix, the pleasure is all mine – great blog).

    I know I said I was speechless but allow me to effuse a bit over this illustration. There’s just so much narrative packed into this one panel. The composition is perfect, nothing is confusing. But it takes a minute to assess what is going on, and as you do, you start to create a story in your mind. Just who is the model, anyway, do you think? The dressmaker’s assistant? A delivery person? And I especially love the subtlety of his hard on, reflected in the mirror. And his gigantic ass, of course.

    Reply

  477. Natty
    Jan 24, 2010 @ 11:10:44

    Drub, it’s an honor to see you around these parts. The style of this drawing sort of reminds me of your stuff, a little.

    Reply

  478. jkrs
    Jan 24, 2010 @ 16:42:22

    poor guy. that Jigglypuff sure is a bastard. and what’s up with the Sharpie in it’s hand??

    Reply

  479. Natty
    Jan 24, 2010 @ 21:34:05

    I’m ignorant of Pokemon so I had no idea what that was. I’d sort of thought it was an upside down pig mask that the guy had perhaps been wearing, until I looked more closely. It’s worth asking what the fuck is going on in this picture, the expression on our hip friend’s face is so hard to read.

    Reply

  480. homocomix
    Jan 25, 2010 @ 04:34:34

    Jigglypuff(s) is(are) the singer pokemon(s)that sing a lullaby tune and listeners can’t help from falling asleep, something that makes Jigglypuff(s) really angry because they don’t listen to all of their song. As a revenge they take a marker and draw the sleepers’ faces.
    In this picture:
    1. the guy fell asleep from Jigglypuff’s song and the Jigglypuff plugged him the bottle, but not yet marked his face
    2. the guy fell asleep from Jigglypuff’s song but was already drunk and had the bottle plugged in so the Jigglypuff didn’t know how to react,
    3. the guy was already asleep because he was drunk before the Jigglypuff’s song start and Jigglypuff didn’t know how to react
    4. the guy was asleep because he was drunk, Jigglypuff sang, then saw the guy sleep, tried to take revenge but was shocked of the view of the beerfucked guy.
    That means Jigglypuff is definitely gay

    Reply

  481. Natty
    Jan 25, 2010 @ 08:02:01

    Well with a name like Jigglypuff, he’d have to be gay. Thanks for the analysis, homocomix!

    Reply

  482. natty soltesz's blog & gay erotic stories » Thanks, Handjobs Readers!
    Jan 25, 2010 @ 22:39:07

    […] Magazine You all know my quasi-policy on story sequels, but I had so much fun writing the sequel to My Sister’s Boyfriend Joey that I might do it […]

    Reply

  483. jkrs
    Jan 25, 2010 @ 23:05:47

    ah-ha!

    per bulbapedia:
    “One Jigglypuff carries a marker, and scribbles on people’s faces when they fall asleep.”

    Reply

  484. natty soltesz's blog & gay erotic stories » A.V. Phibes
    Jan 26, 2010 @ 10:42:33

    […] just came across this, another nice Art Frahm tribute (see Paul Richmond’s Cheesecake Boys), which in turn led me to more art by A.V. […]

    Reply

  485. Steve
    Jan 26, 2010 @ 20:16:47

    Silly man. Everyone knows that mock sequel names should be done in the form of ‘My Sister’s Boyfriend Joey 2: Electric Bugaloo’…

    Reply

  486. Natty
    Jan 26, 2010 @ 20:51:03

    I saw Breakin 2 at the drive-in…jesus, I must have been five years old. I remember I ate so many Fritos I almost threw up and I never liked Fritos again.

    Reply

  487. Sera Sera
    Jan 27, 2010 @ 17:40:37

    Awww! I’m so proud of you!

    Reply

  488. Natty
    Jan 27, 2010 @ 19:19:18

    Thank you my sweet Sera!

    Reply

  489. Kerwin
    Jan 28, 2010 @ 20:25:26

    Yeah, that was the best erotic stories I’ve read in a while. Brilliant job.

    Reply

  490. Steve
    Jan 28, 2010 @ 20:27:55

    Fritos have always smelled like dirty socks to me…

    Reply

  491. jkrs
    Jan 30, 2010 @ 01:03:08

    happy birthday, Natty!
    and yay for piece-of-shit HP laptops!

    oh, and by the way?… i’d love to see more posts like this– caffeine-fueled or otherwise.

    Reply

  492. Ronny P.
    Jan 30, 2010 @ 12:47:50

    Happy Birthday Mr. Natty!!! I saw your Facebook profile pic and i would have never thought 31 yrs old. Ive been reading your stories ever since i first discovered them when i was in high school on nifty (im 26 now) and have been hooked ever since.

    You should finish and post some of those backlog stories on here. Your stories have a special quality that cannot be described but everytime i read one, i always get a boner. That alone tells me that your stories achieves its goal and that is the key to a erotic story (IMO anyways).

    Its sad that the traditional outlet for your stories is slowly going away. But i think you should look to the future and go digital. You already have the platform to showoff your stories and i think you have a good base of readers who would read anything you post (me included). Have you thought of sites like Loose Id to publish your stories digitally? Or even do it yourself on here? I would pay to read what you have because your writing is worth the time and effort you put into them. Cant wait to read the Backwoods anthology as well.

    Forgive me for my long post, lol. Again Happy Birthday!!!

    Reply

  493. Natty
    Jan 31, 2010 @ 10:08:43

    jkrs, Thank you very much sir.

    Ronny P., Nice to meet ya and thanks for the bday wish. Glad you are hooked…that’s how I reel em in, see? The first one’s free, then you gotta pay… Another reader mentioned epublishing a little while ago, and I have to admit, I was largely ignorant of this whole market but it seems pretty booming. It kind of excited me and I’m kicking around some ideas on that end.

    Reply

  494. david
    Feb 02, 2010 @ 20:29:32

    I want it.

    Reply

  495. natty soltesz's blog & gay erotic stories » New Story Alert!
    Feb 02, 2010 @ 20:52:02

    […] Here it is, folks, the end result of my experiment in reader-assisted decision making: […]

    Reply

  496. jkrs
    Feb 03, 2010 @ 03:38:08

    ummmm… you can’t have it, but you can apparently pay for it? christ. Caleb Larsen is a straight-up hustler. and poor Terence Spies(the first new “owner”) probably didn’t even get a reach-around.

    yikes! current starting bids on eBay are just below $7,000.

    Reply

  497. Dwight Supremacy
    Feb 03, 2010 @ 04:16:39

    It is like the hottest family reunion picture ever. ๐Ÿ™‚

    Reply

  498. Dwight Supremacy
    Feb 03, 2010 @ 04:19:30

    Wow, that story got me hot and know these comments have me hot for the sequel!

    Reply

  499. david
    Feb 03, 2010 @ 06:02:15

    yeah i know i can’t have it. i read the article. it’s the fact that it will escape me that makes me want to try and possess it.

    Reply

  500. Natty
    Feb 03, 2010 @ 06:21:39

    I know, and Larsen gets like 15% of the price each time it’s sold. But you gotta admit it’s kinda brilliant.

    Reply

  501. Natty Soltesz's Blog & Gay Erotic Stories » New Story Alert!
    Feb 04, 2010 @ 08:11:20

    […] poll (and its results) was inspiring – I wrote this story before voting was even finished, figuring if a different […]

    Reply

  502. shane allison
    Feb 06, 2010 @ 00:30:57

    OMFG! You and I are kindred spirits because I have the same identical writing and creative habits and attitude. I get very pissed when I know I’m not writing and haven’t written anything substantial for a while. I’ve been collaging all this week, so I go back and forth from genres. You can see some of the mad shit I have created on my FB page. Your collages are fantastic by the way, as well as your stories. ‘Course you know I’m a fan! I have gotten on with the e-publishing craze. I’ve always been about getting the work out their to the masses as best you can. That’s what’s important. Consider it moving to the next level of your form. Keep writin’, man, and happy birthday.

    Reply

  503. Natty
    Feb 06, 2010 @ 09:28:41

    Thanks Shane!

    Reply

  504. Sera Sera
    Feb 07, 2010 @ 21:27:01

    This makes me feel slightly awkward… *laugh*

    Reply

  505. MM4W – No Dudes! Not Gay!! We Don’t Touch Each Other!!! | Mark Simpson .com
    Feb 15, 2010 @ 07:22:49

    […] and possibly disturbing – MM4W Craiglist personal ads spotted on the rather fascinating NattySoltesz.com (not entirely office […]

    Reply

  506. Mark Simpson
    Feb 20, 2010 @ 05:31:49

    You’re right of course that it’s best to let these ads just speak for themselves. And their cocks.

    But I can’t help pointing out that it seems as if these advertisers have been reading those Straight To Hell comics from the 1970s. Not that I’m complaining.

    My favourite line of all is: ‘Love licking my girlfriend’s pussy, so I’d also like to try licking your cock and asshole.’ It’s the kind of hilarious but when you think about it actually very plausible very wise line that I suspect could only be ‘100% gen’.

    Reply

  507. Natty
    Feb 20, 2010 @ 07:48:42

    Mark,

    I’m glad you enjoy these because it’s inspiring me to do another, even though they’re a total pain in the ass to construct.

    I love Craigslist ads because it’s all about the promise and the fantasy. Those stories in Straight to Hell are the like the warts-and-all aftermath (which I also enjoy, just in a different way).

    The most boner-ific ad here for me is the guy whose girlfriend was cheating on him with his best friend: “I’m not looking for a relationship (which is why I’m not looking for a chick).” And I have a special place in my heart for the man who purports that his girlfriend is gone and wants another guy to come over to just cuddle with him and kiss, no sex. It’s poignant.

    Reply

  508. Natty
    Feb 20, 2010 @ 10:18:40

    Rob, that’s my favorite lyric too, though “When the light strikes twice” is growing on me. And I’m sure I don’t have to add that I would totally hit it, yellow hat/vest combo and all.

    Reply

  509. Alexander
    Feb 23, 2010 @ 19:12:09

    Do you think “Backwoods” will be available for sale in bookstores, or only online? Will you now be able to quit your day job and write fulltime? Now that you are an established author, IN PRINT, do you suppose you can get your collected erotic fiction published in a single hardback volume? STRIKE WHILE THE IRON IS HOT!

    Reply

  510. Natty
    Feb 23, 2010 @ 22:09:21

    Rob – but of course!

    Alexander – Yes, yes a thousand times YES! Actually I have no idea about any of that except, as I told my friend Rob, I hardly intend on becoming a “thousandaire” from this deal when all is said and done. BUT WHO CARES ABOUT MONEY RIGHT?

    Reply

  511. arctic_jay
    Feb 23, 2010 @ 23:38:35

    Congratulations! I’m really looking forward to reading it.

    Rebel Satori seems like a really cool publisher, too.

    As for money, the wealthy are lousy at sex and even worse at writing about it.

    Proof: Jean Genet vs. John Updike.

    Reply

  512. Alexander
    Feb 24, 2010 @ 08:37:18

    I didn’t watch this YouTube video for two reasons. The main one is that it would appear from the image that “Maurly” (what kind of name is Maurly?) is a GIRL, and I am only interested in stories about promiscuous 15 year old BOYS (or boys having sex with their Junior High School teachers). The second reason is that I am still have a DIALUP connection, and, believe it or not, even a 57-second clip seems to take FOREVER to play. So many blogs are now largely made up of video clips. :[ O, for the days when I blogs were read! Ah well, these ARE the “end times”, and I must needs adapt or perish. P.S. Do not underestimate the IMPORTANCE (when possible) of putting a SUBSTANTIAL CASH VALUE on your literary output. People tend to think writing is only worth what it costs. Give it away, and its value becomes suspect. I suggest you price “Backwoods” at $25.00 (and be sure to include your photo on the jacket, you hot piece of talent, you).

    Reply

  513. Natty
    Feb 24, 2010 @ 08:58:15

    Would you buy a $25 book? I wouldn’t.

    Reply

  514. Natty
    Feb 24, 2010 @ 09:59:28

    I’ll just do the jacket Craigslist-style and put a picture of my boner.

    Reply

  515. Natty
    Feb 24, 2010 @ 10:17:04

    Thanks arctic_jay!

    Reply

  516. Alexander
    Feb 24, 2010 @ 11:01:13

    Yeah, I find stuff in my dreams all the time…and what I find is ALWAYS bigger than it should be (half-dollars the size of dinner plates, books the size of dumpsters). What size were the Sparks albums? If they weren’t compatible with standard turntables, then you probably found them in one of your wet dreams. Speaking of which, I WILL MOST CERTAINLY PAY $25.00 FOR “BACKWOODS” IF IT HAS A JACKET PHOTO OF YOUR BONER (and if it contains ADDITIONAL full-frontal nude color photos of you within I am willing to go as high as $35.00)! I’m telling you, redheads SELL!

    Reply

  517. Alexander
    Feb 24, 2010 @ 17:39:11

    Thank you for this rare image of collegiate fellowship — one frat boy drinking an ass shot off of another! I had to copy it for my stroke file. Now really, how much gayer can you get? “69” might as well just go ahead and suck “Plaid Boxer”‘s balls. Anyway, it’s a crotch-warming tableau.

    As for Active Duty, the guys Dink Flamingo uses in his videos are so unabashedly and disappointingly gay. They are handsome, without a doubt, but obvious homos nonetheless. At least at Military Classified and AWOL Marines you will see young men who BELIEVE themselves to be cunt-lapping straights. They act against their nature, and only out of a desperate need for quick cash! That probably is not the case, but the porn is BETTER because THE PERFORMERS HAVE CONVINCED THEMSELVES OF THEIR HETEROCITY.

    Truth be told, all men are queer under optimal conditions, and that’s because dicks are exciting and pussies are not.

    Reply

  518. Natty
    Feb 24, 2010 @ 18:34:51

    1) Labels are slippery and they bore me.
    2) I’d rather see a guy having fun than one acting under duress.
    3) Pussies are sexy (just not my bag).

    Reply

  519. Alexander
    Feb 25, 2010 @ 05:10:44

    Exceptions and Clarifications:
    1a) Erections too can be slippery and bore you.
    2a) A guy can have fun acting out with his head under a duress.
    3a) Pussies are sexier seen proximal to some other man’s bag.

    Reply

  520. Steve
    Feb 25, 2010 @ 23:04:58

    I’ve always loved Sparks! Eaten By The Monster Of Love is not only one of my ringtones but I also posted it all over the place for Valentines Day!

    Reply

  521. Alexander
    Feb 26, 2010 @ 19:12:03

    Studies have shown that boys who have sex with old clowns are NOT damaged psychologically, and the clowns seem to benefit connsiderably from such experiences.

    As for coulrophobia, I don’t know for sure, but I’m guessing I’m afeared of coulros.

    Reply

  522. Dwight Supremacy
    Feb 27, 2010 @ 06:53:24

    The “Maurly” clip is classic. LOL. And, yeah, go with the boner pic for the book cover! ha.

    Reply

  523. Dwight Supremacy
    Feb 27, 2010 @ 06:56:38

    So glad you posted this. Years ago I found his blog and remember liking it, then somehow lost track of it. Thanks.

    Reply

  524. Dwight Supremacy
    Feb 27, 2010 @ 07:01:35

    That would make my month!

    Reply

  525. bILL
    Feb 27, 2010 @ 19:47:31

    My goodness… looks more like PORK than beef! LOL!

    Reply

  526. Alexander
    Mar 02, 2010 @ 12:11:33

    That a man should have publicly-accessible images of himself engaging in oroanal (and other) activities with multiple males is no longer a serious obstacle to a successful career in the more conventional fields of our entertainment industry.

    Reply

  527. Sera Sera
    Mar 03, 2010 @ 21:23:13

    You are amazing!

    Reply

  528. Sera Sera
    Mar 03, 2010 @ 21:27:13

    Thanks for ruining my night. Kidding, but this is seriously freaky. I hate clowns. Damn, Stephen King. And the mother and everyone else wants Penny. I wish I’d been alive in the 60s.

    Reply

  529. Steve
    Mar 03, 2010 @ 21:30:08

    They kinda look like I wish my one and only acid trip had looked like…

    Reply

  530. Sera Sera
    Mar 03, 2010 @ 21:36:27

    I just watched this six times in a row, emailed it and facebooked it. Seriously. I’m 27 years old and I don’t give a shit.

    Reply

  531. Alexander
    Mar 03, 2010 @ 21:59:39

    Very vibrant work, Natty — I just wish you wouldn’t GIVE IT AWAY. I assure you, if these collages were displayed in a gallery, with price tags affixed, they would SELL.

    Also, first came “Backwoods” (hillbillies are hot), and then “College Town USA” (fratboys are hot too). Please consider setting your NEXT literary sizzler on a dairy farm (think of the possibilities with the milking machine)!

    Reply

  532. Natty
    Mar 03, 2010 @ 22:05:24

    I know Sera. I think 25% of this video’s views are from me.

    Reply

  533. Natty
    Mar 03, 2010 @ 22:10:32

    Thanks Sera and Steve. Alexander, do you have a CAPS LOCK problem? Thanks just the same!

    Reply

  534. Natty Soltesz's Blog & Gay Erotic Stories » Story Sequel Poll, Part 2
    Mar 03, 2010 @ 23:45:26

    […] last poll I did went really well, and I was surprised by how much it inspired me, so I’m doing it […]

    Reply

  535. Alexander
    Mar 04, 2010 @ 09:50:56

    You received less-than-optimal results from your Google search because YOU MISSPELLED “POLE”.

    I am pleased to see that NO ONE (so far) wants you to write a story which includes PUSSY. May I vote more than once?

    I heart CAPS.

    Reply

  536. Natty
    Mar 04, 2010 @ 11:14:59

    I am saddened yet unsurprised at the lack of pussy support. What surprises and delights me, however, is that the one category I added because it was two in the morning and it made me laugh is getting some serious traction. Truth be told, it’s the one I voted for.

    And no, sorry Alexander, you may not vote more than once.

    Reply

  537. seth
    Mar 05, 2010 @ 02:07:35

    wow, your collages are really good! you have GREAT fodder- do you pick it out, or does your thrift loving boyfriend scavenge on your behalf? that’s pretty sweet if he does.

    you’re probably already familiar, but my favorite collage-ist(?) is david wojnarowicz. he wrote some amazing books, was an activist, hustler, BRILLIANT artist- god, he’s just about my favorite. probably my favorite artist, along with oscar oiwa.

    anyway, yeah. you should google

    david wojnarowicz collage

    Reply

  538. Natty
    Mar 05, 2010 @ 06:01:54

    Hi Seth – thanks! Yes, much credit goes to my thrifty BF who supplies me with a steady stream of books – I think I have every children’s encyclopedia known to man. I will Google that guy when I get to work. Cause that’s what I do at work.

    Reply

  539. Alexander
    Mar 05, 2010 @ 17:32:15

    Natty, do you PERSONALLY search for videos such as this, or are people familiar with your tastes forwarding them to you? I am wondering because, with the (literally) MILLIONS of videos online, you would have to spend half the freaking DAY sorting through Internet rubbish just to find a few gems. By the way, this guy has some laudable guns!

    Reply

  540. Natty
    Mar 05, 2010 @ 19:09:42

    I have a personal assistant whose job is to trove YouTube for muscle boy videos. I was pleased with this one so I gave her extra bread and water.

    Reply

  541. Alexander
    Mar 06, 2010 @ 14:16:06

    Now that it appears certain the story will feature “straight(ish) buds”, I can only hope that one of them will have carrot-red hair, an impossibly-big dick and minimal intelligence.

    Reply

  542. Alexander
    Mar 06, 2010 @ 14:24:40

    HER?!? Natty, you DO seem to have a most unnatural interest in pussy.

    Reply

  543. Alexander
    Mar 06, 2010 @ 18:04:57

    Congratulations, Natty — your work is beginning to appear EVERYWHERE! I wonder why such an old guy was chosen for the cover of a book of college boy stories. Also, in the Powell’s Books synopsis, when “top erotic authors” are mentioned, why were YOU relegated to “and more”? It’a an outrage.

    Reply

  544. Sera Sera
    Mar 06, 2010 @ 21:45:34

    I voted bisexual. Surprise. It was a tough call though. My second would have been intergenerational.

    Reply

  545. Steven MacIntyre
    Mar 07, 2010 @ 01:22:32

    Awesome, as usual, Natty. I especially like “Phonecall.” Are you ever gonna sell? If so, let me know. If I’m not broke, I’m buying. ๐Ÿ™‚

    Also, kudos to Seth. I checked out David W. and his work is amazing. Also, the PPOW Gallery that houses his estate also displays the estate of Martin Wong, another fantastic artist.

    Hope all is well!

    Reply

  546. Natty
    Mar 09, 2010 @ 08:14:55

    Or ply them with baked goods.

    Reply

  547. whey
    Mar 09, 2010 @ 14:02:44

    I’m betting the critic is a “writer” himself who was probably unfavorably compared to you.

    Reply

  548. Steve
    Mar 10, 2010 @ 20:14:33

    Rob, I’m pretty sure you’re describing an ex…

    Reply

  549. jason
    Mar 11, 2010 @ 08:22:47

    i second the red hair call.

    I also think you should do a medical story, even if it’s not the next one.

    Reply

  550. Natty
    Mar 11, 2010 @ 11:43:52

    The kicker is that somebody called me out on this before and I fixed the story then, but I must have reverted to an old version when I redid the site. That person said it nicely and I was grateful.

    Reply

  551. Natty Soltesz's Blog & Gay Erotic Stories » Story Subgenre Poll Results
    Mar 11, 2010 @ 11:48:58

    […] Looks like it’s straight guys after all. Sigh. Don’t I write enough of those stories? Well, at least this is gonna be easy to write. I was pulling for the Stifler story myself, guess I’ll have to make do with this, as always: var addthis_pub = ''; var addthis_language = 'en';var addthis_options = 'email, favorites, digg, twitter, myspace, google, facebook, tumblr, live, more'; […]

    Reply

  552. Mark Simpson
    Mar 11, 2010 @ 14:24:45

    One of my favourite movie scenes of all time. The acting is so convincing – I wonder if Mr Scott is a follower of the Method School?

    Reply

  553. Natty
    Mar 11, 2010 @ 14:56:08

    I hope so Mark. It would add a new dimension to the scenes from his oeuvre in which he drinks cum, receives a golden shower, and tongue kisses Ashton Kutcher.

    Reply

  554. whey
    Mar 11, 2010 @ 19:35:17

    Can’t help it, there are so few that can write the straight genre well, we’re not letting you go! (But, I have no doubt, other genres will continue to be equally well received.)

    Reply

  555. Steve
    Mar 11, 2010 @ 20:42:13

    I always thought that infamous scene would have worked better if he had loved the new taste in his beer…

    Reply

  556. Mek27300
    Mar 12, 2010 @ 08:30:25

    Natty, I read that story but was too hard to notice what that dude pointed out. I really love your writing.

    Reply

  557. jkrs
    Mar 14, 2010 @ 19:14:22

    fuck ’em!
    i voted for Stifler, too.

    Reply

  558. Natty
    Mar 16, 2010 @ 04:40:03

    Underneath that sweater I bet he’s still got the goods. But even the text now is rounded and soft.

    Reply

  559. Dwight Supremacy
    Mar 16, 2010 @ 06:16:04

    Stifler and Straightish Buds are in my top three with Intergenerational taking the top spot. ๐Ÿ™‚ But I’m happy either way. Ha.

    Reply

  560. david
    Mar 18, 2010 @ 19:46:47

    eating toast, great. eating cum, great. eating toast with cum on it, disgusting. strange how that works.

    Reply

  561. Mark Simpson
    Mar 19, 2010 @ 16:45:44

    I missed some of those other scenes from Scott’s oeuvre! Did he tongue-kiss Ashton Kutcher after he drank the cum?

    Or is that being held back for the sequel?

    Reply

  562. Natty
    Mar 19, 2010 @ 18:49:53

    Mark, the kiss with Ashton from “Dude Where’s My Car” is a must-see. In fact, that whole movie has tons of weird subtext just waiting for your analysis.

    From what I can remember, Seann’s cum eating scene is from American Pie 1, the golden shower scene is from American Pie 2, and the salami-riding scene has yet to be written…

    Reply

  563. Helio
    Mar 23, 2010 @ 11:57:51

    How do you feel about that now?
    I’m fascinated about the process of aging. Sometimes I look at people in the subway and try to imagine them younger, the skin getting firmer, the lines softening and their worries disappearing. Because I’m sure that even for a moment, these persons were wide eyed innocents with the whole world to conquer (cheesy, I know).

    Reply

  564. Natty
    Mar 23, 2010 @ 16:19:58

    Helio, I still feel like this a lot but not as much as I used to.

    Reply

  565. seth
    Mar 25, 2010 @ 23:39:23

    DAMES, DICE and DOPE!

    so rad!

    Reply

  566. Mark Simpson
    Mar 26, 2010 @ 21:49:52

    Ah yes, I remember it now, thanks to your trusty YouTube link which brought it all flooding back – the way they freak out the two ugly chicks in the muscle car at the lights!

    I haven’t seen that movie since it came out and forgot it starred a criminally young Ashton and Seann. Now I know why I enjoyed it.

    Doesn’t Ashton star in a later movie as a youth who triest to give up wanking for lent? Basically we spend the whole movie waiting for him to drown someone in semen. There’s a film that is beyond analysis.

    Reply

  567. seth
    Mar 26, 2010 @ 21:58:36

    my favorite (not pictured) besides the obvious genius of octopus/piranha attacks is “How Ice Cream Is Made” from the Saturday Evening Post series (and that series in general). those are so neat! You must come from some good art stock, Natty. I also like the one of the trains… “Their Last Ride” or something, i think. How cool to find something like that out about your family.

    Reply

  568. Natty
    Mar 27, 2010 @ 05:35:55

    Hey seth, glad you liked them. Yeah, those cutaways are incredible and slightly obsessive, esp the supermarket one – all those little products on the shelves!

    Reply

  569. Natty
    Mar 27, 2010 @ 17:16:19

    More revelations: this film features a very young and instantly-recognizable Michael Cera and an apparent reference to Todd Browning’s “Freaks.”

    Reply

  570. Natty
    Mar 27, 2010 @ 17:16:51

    And yes I’m bored enough to link to all this shit while I’m watching it.

    Reply

  571. Natty
    Mar 27, 2010 @ 18:31:47

    The eight year old was getting bored too. She made the second selection (Netflix instant view: we just got the Wii adapter CD that lets you watch it on your TV), a version of “Peter and the Wolf” animated by Suzie Templeton. Amazing, stop-motion animation like I’ve never seen before, fluid and hyper-detailed in this grungy/realistic yet expressionistic style.

    Reply

  572. Natty
    Mar 27, 2010 @ 19:10:17

    I have to say I’m not well versed when it comes to Ashton’s oeuvre. He’s lacking the “take all comers” aspect that Seann William Scott has in spades. In college I took a class called Masculinity and Film and I wrote my final paper on Scott. I’d post it here if I didn’t feel I’d be utterly embarrassing myself in the face of your nimble intellect, Mr. Simpson.

    Side story: I went to New York a few years back to meet with Joe Gage for the first time. While I traveled to his house in Long Island, my bf stayed behind in the city and saw the sights, including one celebrity: Seann Motherfucking William Scott, walking around in jeans with some girl/beard. I was genuinely jealous.

    Reply

  573. Ty
    Mar 27, 2010 @ 20:29:09

    Damn, he looks great in those jeans. Yummy.

    That Michael Cera clip his pretty funny. “I have a very delicate bone structure!”

    Reply

  574. Mark Simpson
    Mar 28, 2010 @ 06:37:14

    I’d love to read your stalker paper on Scott. I’ve always found his filmic persona intriguing. He’s both the ‘dude’ and the ‘fag’ – one of the guys and yet not; phallic and yet contstantly violated. Although in American Pie this might have something to do with the fact he’s not as bourgeois and sad as the other more ‘likable’ characters, I think he points up something about American masculinity. And how to jump it.

    Oh, and don’t worry about my ‘nimble intellect’ – as you can tell from this post, I’m just a heavy breather these days.

    Reply

  575. Natty
    Mar 28, 2010 @ 17:30:59

    I know you won’t Rob, but you WILL be coming up for Anthrocon…won’t you?

    Reply

  576. Anonymous
    Mar 30, 2010 @ 21:12:08

    Simply epic.

    Reply

  577. Ty
    Mar 30, 2010 @ 23:21:55

    So fucking hot.

    Nice find.

    Reply

  578. david
    Apr 01, 2010 @ 05:18:51

    thanks to your post i now have a medical fetish. i vote you write your next story about this subject and use mr. johnson as a main character.

    Reply

  579. Ty
    Apr 01, 2010 @ 23:35:27

    I second that vote. That Mr. Johnson was pretty yummy looking.

    Reply

  580. Sera Sera
    Apr 02, 2010 @ 18:30:57

    This looks familiar. Look at you informing the public! *hugs*

    Reply

  581. Sera Sera
    Apr 02, 2010 @ 18:32:11

    Now I feel slightly awkward…

    Reply

  582. Natty
    Apr 03, 2010 @ 11:01:11

    Yes I’m trying to do my part, haha.

    Reply

  583. Natty
    Apr 03, 2010 @ 11:01:51

    “Mr. Johnson”…do you think that was an in-joke?

    Reply

  584. david
    Apr 03, 2010 @ 16:39:33

    “Pain don’t hurt.”

    Reply

  585. seth
    Apr 06, 2010 @ 20:21:06

    no, it’s totally true. roadhouse is epic. something about patrick swayze’s face has always been a little bit weird to me, at least until he went through male menopause. he looks like corey feldman’s dad or something.

    Reply

  586. Helio
    Apr 06, 2010 @ 23:07:01

    This guy is famous here in the UK. He has several programs on body issues such as weight and embarrassing ilnesses. He is. Gay and actually cute (much better than the picture. Kick ass body and a really nice ass.

    Reply

  587. Ronny P.
    Apr 09, 2010 @ 22:04:51

    Man that sounds like a great title for a story.

    Reply

  588. Ronny P.
    Apr 09, 2010 @ 22:06:26

    the “Bitch Won’t Swallow” for your next story.

    Reply

  589. Natty
    Apr 10, 2010 @ 08:19:58

    Bitches, I tell you, always forcing perfectly normal fellows to get their cock sucked by other guys.

    Reply

  590. Natty Soltesz's Blog & Gay Erotic Stories » Thoughts on “August: Osage County”
    Apr 11, 2010 @ 13:19:35

    […] But as we know, because the girl in question is post-pubescent, the uncle-type is not a pedophile. There is a distinction. It’s important that people get this distinction through their heads if they are to have an […]

    Reply

  591. Natty Soltesz's Blog & Gay Erotic Stories » New Story Alert!
    Apr 13, 2010 @ 09:19:30

    […] bud” story and as such it fulfills my duty as per the result of my most recent story poll. It’s not a new story, however, it’s an old one that I discovered and re-read and […]

    Reply

  592. whey
    Apr 13, 2010 @ 12:07:50

    Darnit, clicked the link to give you $$, and it returned “Fatal Failure”.

    Reply

  593. Natty
    Apr 13, 2010 @ 12:31:43

    I fixed it, thanks.

    Reply

  594. Natty Soltesz's Blog & Gay Erotic Stories » Backwoods Update
    Apr 13, 2010 @ 15:11:54

    […] dream for the book has always been for it to be illustrated. A while back I contacted Michael Kirwan about working with me. I’m a huge fan of his drawings, and his style is perfectly suited to […]

    Reply

  595. david
    Apr 15, 2010 @ 21:52:14

    Reply

  596. Natty
    Apr 16, 2010 @ 06:12:07

    I dig.

    Reply

  597. jkrs
    Apr 17, 2010 @ 22:17:20

    i still keep a clip of #3 on my phone all the time. me likey.

    ill get back atcha with some recommendations.
    ๐Ÿ˜‰

    –j.

    Reply

  598. Natty
    Apr 18, 2010 @ 07:13:52

    Thanks J-Bone.

    Reply

  599. Helio
    Apr 24, 2010 @ 04:35:22

    What about the Sean Cody scene, bailey and his friend? Whilst not as good as California kings, it definetly rates very high on my list.

    I looked to see if he gad done mre stuff but it seems that he did just two scenes. Did find this post on him though:

    http://queermenow.net/blog/sean-codys-muscle-jock-bailey-nude-photography-book/#more-18009

    Reply

  600. Natty
    Apr 24, 2010 @ 06:01:38

    Helio, that’s definitely one of my favorites, and I did write a story based on it. With this post I stuck to studio films, but I did another on amateur vids that I’ll repost sometime soon.

    Reply

  601. John
    Apr 24, 2010 @ 06:44:47

    Natty, I’d like to submit a story series for your list of essential erotic books. The series is called The Draegan Lords by M.L. Rhodes. There are 3 books in the series so far, M.L. is working on the 4th one right now. The first is True of Heart, then Lords of Kellesborne, and the most recent is Fires of Ballian. The story is fantasy and gay romance and is published by Amber Allure, the website is http://www.amberquill.com/AmberAllure/

    I could share a copy of the first book for you to get a taste of the quality of her writing.

    Thanks,

    JOHN

    Reply

  602. Christian Wright
    Apr 24, 2010 @ 10:26:41

    Natty,

    Just a quick note to let you know that I just blogged about your Kickstarter project here:
    http://christianwright.blogspot.com/2010/04/help-make-nattys-book-pornier.html

    Good Luck!

    XXX,
    Christian

    Reply

  603. seth
    Apr 24, 2010 @ 19:24:40

    oh, wow! congratulations, natty! i’m super excited for you ๐Ÿ™‚

    Reply

  604. jkrs
    Apr 24, 2010 @ 20:39:11

    sweet christ, that was quick. i havent been online much lately(via a computer, anyway) & this seems to’ve come to fruition almost immediately after i started following. congratulations, Natty! i look forward to ordering a copy for myself as soon as it comes out.

    Reply

  605. jkrs
    Apr 24, 2010 @ 20:42:26

    great video! i like how Lost Girls can be seen behind ya on yer bookshelf… very appropriate
    ๐Ÿ˜‰

    –j.

    Reply

  606. Plato
    Apr 25, 2010 @ 00:33:44

    Just found your blog through male-art-toons@yahoogroups.com — this thing is sexy and fun.

    Congratulations on raising the funds for the Kirwan illustrations.

    And BIG thanks to david for the lead on Pisces — gorgeous.

    Reply

  607. Natty
    Apr 25, 2010 @ 05:51:48

    You noticed! Oh good.

    Reply

  608. Natty
    Apr 25, 2010 @ 05:57:02

    Thanks Plato! I’m gonna check out that group.

    Reply

  609. bj
    Apr 25, 2010 @ 09:38:01

    I think i still have the MEN OF THE MIDWAY clip up –

    http://weblog.bjland.ws/2009/05/daddy-has-bag-of-dildos-men-of-midway.html

    Reply

  610. Mike
    Apr 25, 2010 @ 11:20:47

    Hey, Natty, a big congratulations! You are the best.

    Reply

  611. Sera Sera
    Apr 25, 2010 @ 17:34:40

    Don’t hesitate! Congrats, Natty cake! <3

    Reply

  612. Natty
    Apr 25, 2010 @ 17:59:59

    Seth, Jkrs, Mike, Sera – thank you!!! Rob, I believe you.

    Reply

  613. seth
    Apr 29, 2010 @ 18:36:42

    one of the all-time great wake up eat some cereal and do more drugs songs… but i guess you could say that about a pretty high percentage of Velvet Underground/Nico/Lou Reed Songs, lol. i like how the song sounds like it exists on a plane where the sun is definately shining.

    Reply

  614. Natty
    Apr 29, 2010 @ 19:06:53

    yeah, a lot of Velvets songs sound like they’re on that plane. Candy Says…mmmmmmm. This is definitely one of my all-time favorites.

    Reply

  615. Johnny Murdoc
    Apr 30, 2010 @ 08:11:39

    I love that font.

    That is all.

    Reply

  616. Dwight Supremacy
    May 03, 2010 @ 15:46:38

    Sounds hot as usual. Gotta go pick up a copy!

    Reply

  617. Dwight Supremacy
    May 03, 2010 @ 15:53:25

    Awesomeness! As soon as my ass isn’t broke, I’ll throw a little dough your way!

    Reply

  618. seth
    May 05, 2010 @ 01:48:42

    i love todd solondz, and this is along with palindromes (with the mutant christian dance sequence) is probably my favorite film of his.

    I’m not sure WHY this reminds you that college is evil, but for me (and this may make me a bad person), i would LOVE to have a writing teacher that talks to the students like that. what i can’t stand is the relentless positivity towards horrible pieces.

    Reply

  619. david
    May 05, 2010 @ 04:58:52

    i was hesitant to watch this because of the striped face, but i’m glad i did.

    Reply

  620. Natty
    May 05, 2010 @ 11:13:35

    I could say a lot about Solondz – “Welcome to the Dollhouse” remains the only film I’ve ever walked out on – but I’ll just say that I think “Storytelling” is his masterwork. “Palindromes” had its moments (I like when they go to the dump to find aborted fetuses), but it didn’t gel for me.

    What strikes me about this scene is the palpable awkwardness that I remember too well from writing classes. Everyone shifting in their seats, afraid to talk.

    Reply

  621. ed
    May 05, 2010 @ 12:19:05

    I appreciate any song with the lyric “what the heck is wrong with you”

    Reply

  622. Natty
    May 05, 2010 @ 16:55:37

    Yeah Ed. Not “hell,” “heck.”

    Reply

  623. lito
    May 06, 2010 @ 07:19:00

    i know, i cannot STAND that stupid premise, let alone the marketing for it. totally lame.

    Reply

  624. Natty
    May 06, 2010 @ 07:42:40

    Yep. Oh, and in case you’re reading this SeraSera – of course I’ll still watch it with you.

    Reply

  625. david
    May 06, 2010 @ 16:52:49

    just when i thought movies couldn’t get any lower.

    Reply

  626. samuel
    May 06, 2010 @ 16:56:47

    yeah, i figured it was because they were scared of them too. But i bet they kicked themselves later, when they figured out what they were for.

    Reply

  627. seth
    May 06, 2010 @ 18:20:55

    i didn’t really like ‘dollhouse’ all that much, either- but i didn’t like ‘pink flamingos’ either.

    Reply

  628. Natty
    May 06, 2010 @ 18:42:02

    Well geez, Pink Flamingos is one of my all-time favorites…so I dunno. I guess we’re not a perfect match.

    Reply

  629. seth
    May 07, 2010 @ 03:54:05

    this has all gone horribly awry.

    Reply

  630. Sera Sera
    May 09, 2010 @ 02:02:22

    So of course you knew I’d be reading this. And I’m totally disregarding this post! *laugh* Just so you know I’m almost as scared of centipedes as I am of zombies so you’re in for a treat with regards to my reactions. *hugs*

    P.S. When I go to comment now, my name automatically appears and some crazy URL. S’all good but what’s the dillio?

    Reply

  631. Natty
    May 14, 2010 @ 07:18:33

    The plea is awfully strange, and if you Google around you can find out more about it, which I sort of feel bad about cause I don’t want to make the guy more paranoid.

    Reply

  632. More Gratuitous Footage of Straight Boys Acting Gay | marksimpson.com
    May 14, 2010 @ 14:33:05

    […] Stolen from Natty Soltesz […]

    Reply

  633. Helio
    May 21, 2010 @ 07:30:03

    Thanks for this referral dude! I read the diaries and found them very interesting. Already bought a copy in Amazon.

    I find the characters take on homossexuality interesting. I did astudy on notions of passive and active in abtiquity and things do not seem to have changed much:-). Being active is still acceptable, and being passive is still looked upon as being in some way, weak.

    Reply

  634. Natty
    May 21, 2010 @ 10:57:06

    It’s true. Dan Savage says that homophobia is essentially misogyny – the passive role is seen as less-than.

    Reply

  635. Natty
    May 21, 2010 @ 17:44:11

    Right on, Rob – that’s David Newman, who also did the score for “Heathers,” and who is the brother of Thomas Newman who wins Oscars like constantly for his scores. Thomas Newman is pretty great, too – his score for “The Player” is one of my all-time faves.

    DC’s has a great feature today on hypnagogic pop/chillwave…I feel like this fits in somehow…

    Reply

  636. Steve
    May 23, 2010 @ 22:14:04

    Lars wrote one of my favorite books ever, not the porn ones (tho’ I read a good one or two) but the one with the chess sounding title that I can’t find right now. Aargh!

    Reply

  637. Jase
    May 23, 2010 @ 23:01:18

    I think the V.C. Andrews oeuvre of book covers deserves a shoutout as, perhaps, the Mannerist counterpart to the 1970s Gothic, um, Renaissance.

    Reply

  638. Natty
    May 24, 2010 @ 19:46:50

    Absolutely, Jase. I treasure my paperback copy of “Flowers in the Attic” with the original double-cover/window thingy. Ole V.C. is in a genre by herself: gothic incest horror, maybe?

    Reply

  639. Natty
    May 24, 2010 @ 19:48:47

    It’s called “Pawn to Queen Four” and it’s maybe the only one of his books that I haven’t read, so now you’ve got me thinking I need to check it out. Eighner is most well-known for his memoir of being homeless, “Travels with Lizbeth,” which is a great book.

    Reply

  640. Steve
    May 24, 2010 @ 21:56:42

    Sounds like the prelude to climbing up the water tower with the sniper rifle…

    Reply

  641. Steve
    May 24, 2010 @ 21:57:32

    I’ve read the book three times but not in a few years so I think it’s time to dig it out again…

    Reply

  642. jkrs
    May 25, 2010 @ 18:46:58

    uhmmmm… WHOA

    i used to employ my email address as a name in comment sections? shame on me. and praise Xenu that i finally got a new email.

    Reply

  643. Sera Sera
    May 26, 2010 @ 20:24:30

    Wow, Natty. This resonates hardcore with me right now (for obvious reasons). I’ve just slipped into contemplation.

    Reply

  644. Sera Sera
    May 26, 2010 @ 20:27:30

    I still have your book. I guess we’ve surpassed even to me owing you. *laugh*

    Reply

  645. Natty
    May 27, 2010 @ 06:40:35

    No, we’re even cause that’s one less thing I had to move to the new place. ๐Ÿ™‚

    Reply

  646. seth
    May 30, 2010 @ 20:27:25

    it’s such a fine line with lynch… before i actually watched it, i thought that IE was probably the MOST pretentious thing i’d ever heard of, but then you watch it and it somehow manages to be extremely compelling. i remember reading at the time it came out that he was no longer interested in telling even remotely linear stories, that from now on he was basically going to be doing mood pieces. i didn’t understand how he was going to get more obtuse than he already was, but here it is!

    Reply

  647. seth
    May 30, 2010 @ 22:45:53

    it’s probably my favorite DL movie after Wild at Heart.

    Reply

  648. Natty
    May 31, 2010 @ 06:13:42

    I have to say that I’m not a big fan of Lynch’s earlier movies, though they’re always pretty compelling and interesting enough. But “Mulholland Dr” is possibly my favorite movie of all time, certainly the recent movie I’ve re-watched the most. I have yet to re-watch “Inland Empire” and in some ways I’m not looking forward to it – it’s so looooong – but I remember liking it when I saw it in the theater.

    Reply

  649. seth
    Jun 01, 2010 @ 07:10:33

    i like twin peaks a lot, also. when you say earlier movies, are you talking like elephant man and eraserhead and blue velvet? do you count dune as a david lynch movie? i was thinking about this post today and i can’t remember if i ever asked jason what he thought about DL’s DUNE since the book is one of his favorites. A lot of people that love the book can’t stand the movie, but it’s my best friend rob’s favorite book, and he likes the film. i’m up so late it’s morning and i’m rambling.

    for an inland empire rewatch, i would suggest staying up until you’re pretty tired to the point where you’re almost tripping a little bit- preferably on a cold cold winter night, take a unisom and then stay up with only the tv on while you’re all wrapped up in blankets. alone is best. i just downloaded the bonus material from the dvd- ‘more things that happened.’ i read this really good amazon review of the movie… Eternal Recurrence and The Karmic Wheel of Time, it’s the second review http://www.amazon.com/Lynchs-Inland-Empire-Limited-Two-Disc/dp/B000QQFKYE i thought it was pretty interesting, and i’m excited to rewatch it with those ideas in mind.

    Reply

  650. Natty
    Jun 01, 2010 @ 08:13:07

    I was really into Twin Peaks back when it was on, and I’ve been meaning to re-watch it for years. So yeah, dig that, dig “Eraserhead,” need to rewatch “Blue Velvet.” Never saw “Dune” or “Elephant Man.” Don’t much care for “Wild at Heart.” Dig “Fire Walk with Me.” Is that everything? Probably not.

    I remember getting close to falling asleep in the theater while watching IE and thinking that seemed about right. I liked how it started with opulence – her mansion – and gradually got grungier and grungier until she was lying in the gutter – and then the camera pulled back to reveal even THAT as an illusion.

    Reply

  651. Natty
    Jun 03, 2010 @ 08:29:58

    I will do this with you, Rob! I need motivation to pull myself away sometimes.

    Reply

  652. david
    Jun 03, 2010 @ 20:41:21

    officially requesting a typed translation.

    Reply

  653. seth
    Jun 03, 2010 @ 21:14:36

    your handwriting is definately closer to teenage girl on valium than it is to a serial killer. collecting handwriting analysis books is sort of a hobby for some reason.

    Reply

  654. Natty
    Jun 03, 2010 @ 22:34:55

    Thanks, Rob! David, you’ll have to wait for the book. Thanks for backing up my self-analysis, Seth.

    Reply

  655. david
    Jun 04, 2010 @ 04:14:24

    Soltesz, you have defied me for the last time!

    Reply

  656. Johnny Murdoc
    Jun 04, 2010 @ 08:04:05

    At least you have the good sense to use a full-sized notebook. My little pocket one is handy to carry around, but kind of a bitch to write in. It also plays a nasty trick on me, by making me think I’ve written much more. It’s a drastically different thing to say “Wow! I wrote eighteen pages today!” when the pages are the size of your back pocket.

    I’m glad you posted this; it’s nice to see a physical artifact from time to time, even if it’s a scan of one.

    Reply

  657. Natty
    Jun 04, 2010 @ 08:36:30

    Ah yes, Johnny, but then you have to decide between regular or the daunting prospect of “college ruled.” One time I bought a college ruled notebook by accident and I seriously thought of returning it because I felt so intimidated by all those closely-spaced lines.

    Reply

  658. david
    Jun 05, 2010 @ 00:40:30

    these are the posts i like to read the best. i love listening to people’s personal stories.

    Reply

  659. Natty
    Jun 05, 2010 @ 10:10:14

    Glad you liked it David.

    Reply

  660. seth
    Jun 06, 2010 @ 04:06:55

    JEEZ, nice granny panty tan line.

    Reply

  661. Natty
    Jun 06, 2010 @ 18:14:35

    I know! Maybe the son has a vagina and that’s why Dad is so smitten…

    Reply

  662. Sera Sera
    Jun 06, 2010 @ 20:11:50

    Umm…no. And you know I like guns.

    Reply

  663. Sera Sera
    Jun 06, 2010 @ 20:12:41

    I’m rolling my eyes at the previous posts, but I give a big “hells yeah.”

    Reply

  664. Natty
    Jun 06, 2010 @ 20:18:04

    You have a problem with manginas, Sera? Or granny panties?

    Reply

  665. david
    Jun 06, 2010 @ 23:19:04

    mmmm, he can invade my country anytime.

    Reply

  666. Johnny Murdoc
    Jun 07, 2010 @ 17:49:31

    I loved and loathed various parts of this movie, but I was fucking ecstatic over the credits sequence. There’s a long shelf along the stairs in my house and it currently has stack after stack of paperback books, a significant amount of them purchased at book fairs just because the covers were so. fucking. awesome. This credit sequence is like trolling through those books. I should scan some of them.

    I love that, along with a healthy love for guys in basketball shorts, we’re both book fetishists as well.

    Reply

  667. seth
    Jun 07, 2010 @ 17:49:46

    was that a pre-emptive attempt to keep me at bay?

    FINE!

    Reply

  668. Natty
    Jun 08, 2010 @ 07:16:47

    Sorry Seth. I’m anti quirk.

    Reply

  669. seth
    Jun 08, 2010 @ 19:30:22

    i love how all that straight incest porn is bookended by a single volume of erma bombeck’s earthy comedic musings.

    Reply

  670. david
    Jun 09, 2010 @ 01:54:52

    sorry, this comment doesn’t have anything to do with this post; i was just wondering how your cat waffles is doing.

    Reply

  671. Dwight Supremacy
    Jun 09, 2010 @ 02:38:52

    Wouldn’t that tan line been accurate back then?

    Reply

  672. Dwight Supremacy
    Jun 09, 2010 @ 03:03:04

    “That the cocksucker seems mentally impaired only adds to the mystery.”

    I am in tears! LOL.

    Reply

  673. Natty
    Jun 09, 2010 @ 07:19:11

    Seth: They are kin at thrift stores nationwide.

    David: Cat Waffles?

    Reply

  674. david
    Jun 09, 2010 @ 22:23:32

    am i out of my goddamn mind or didn’t you find a kitten and name it waffles?

    Reply

  675. Natty
    Jun 10, 2010 @ 05:45:44

    I think you lost it David. I do have a cat named Puffy, though.

    Reply

  676. david
    Jun 10, 2010 @ 21:23:37

    my bad. false memory i guess. how’s puffy?

    Reply

  677. seth
    Jun 13, 2010 @ 20:12:13

    What? I LOVED it!

    (just kidding)

    Reply

  678. Natty
    Jun 13, 2010 @ 20:25:24

    Seth, you are deviating from the script. Though I am pretty sure we both like Von Trier movies.

    Reply

  679. Sera Sera
    Jun 15, 2010 @ 21:54:27

    I love you but I’ll pass on the spooge. Yay, kickstarter!

    Reply

  680. Sera Sera
    Jun 15, 2010 @ 21:56:52

    I be so excited for you. So proud. *claps*

    Reply

  681. Sera Sera
    Jun 15, 2010 @ 21:58:14

    I just had an orgasm.

    Reply

  682. Sera Sera
    Jun 15, 2010 @ 21:59:07

    P.S. I own all of them minus Erma’s.

    Reply

  683. davidk
    Jun 18, 2010 @ 06:37:19

    I hated every frame of this movie.

    Reply

  684. Natty Fan
    Jun 21, 2010 @ 19:26:25

    Love your stories and excited about your book. Do you think you’ll ever do a part II for Dr. Craig? That’s one of my favorite stories… and voted for part II a while back when you had the vote for a story sequel. Still think it deserves it’s own sequel, especially the open-ended way it closed… just begging to be continued…

    Reply

  685. Natty
    Jun 26, 2010 @ 20:47:49

    Hey, Fan, thanks for the nice words. Part II for Dr. Craig…I’d consider it!

    Reply

  686. Natty Fan
    Jun 28, 2010 @ 20:03:14

    That would be awesome! I’ll keep an eye out for part II, just in case!

    Reply

  687. whey
    Jun 28, 2010 @ 20:52:55

    Made me think of Super Trooper and the kid in the back seat licking the window saying, “The snozberries taste like snozberries.”

  688. kid 613
    Jun 29, 2010 @ 21:41:32

    this might sound weird…
    but that its like i wrote it… specially this time of my life.

    Reply

    • Natty
      Jul 03, 2010 @ 19:09:25

      kid, I’m glad it spoke it you. I mean I’m not glad. But you know what I mean.

      Reply

  689. david
    Jul 04, 2010 @ 02:11:41

    i saw this movie; i felt neither. after reading this review, i now feel cheated.

    Reply

  690. Natty
    Jul 05, 2010 @ 05:41:21

    A straight friend of mine expressed interest in seeing the porno version of this movie…

    Reply

  691. seth
    Jul 07, 2010 @ 02:52:49

    innerspace was my favorite when i was little… that and little shop of horrors.

    Reply

  692. Nestor Makhno
    Jul 13, 2010 @ 17:57:17

    Nestor Makhno is Yves Sauriol. Sorry! Seems pretentious to insist on that. I had to change my name cuz I was censored from Facebook for the drawing of a penis!

    Reply

  693. Nestor Makhno
    Jul 13, 2010 @ 17:59:19

    My blog http://yvessauriol.blogspot.com. Again sorry for this

    Reply

  694. Natty
    Jul 13, 2010 @ 19:42:12

    Yves, thank you for the correction, the link, and everything! Stupid Facebook! Your art is strange and unusual and I’m glad to link to it.

    Reply

  695. Sera Sera
    Jul 14, 2010 @ 20:32:09

    I must say I’m really mad I didn’t receive # 4. Really?!?

    Reply

  696. Josh
    Jul 17, 2010 @ 17:07:26

    Eh, cheer up, it’s not all bad. Sure, there are about 10,000 raving fucking lunatics to every 1 person with a brain, but most of those people actually do more good than harm. I mean, it’s doubtful that anyone who set out to watch Old Joy would be deterred by Netflix zombies but it irritated you enough to post about it, and I bet people check it out. I added it to my queue; it sounds interesting and I had never heard of it before. It might be a waste of time but it’s equally possible that someone will find something of value.

    Of course, I just spent 5 minutes on a comment that won’t have any impact so I’m probably just reinforcing your point. Damn.

    Reply

  697. Cristiano
    Jul 17, 2010 @ 18:18:32

    Hey Natty, as always your taste is right on – great movie; thanks for pointing to it; best, C.

    Reply

  698. Natty
    Jul 19, 2010 @ 21:12:05

    Josh – I know. The internet can be great, I mean, it’s practically facilitated my entire writing career up to this point. And I appreciated your comment – so it wasn’t useless!

    Cristiano – thanks, man.

    Reply

  699. Ronny P.
    Jul 21, 2010 @ 18:37:57

    Man that is one hot str8 married man. Cant wait to see the story behind that picture. The illustration looks great and cant wait to see the others and see your book. I will definitely be ready to order when it is available. Keep up the work, Natty.

    Reply

  700. Steve
    Jul 22, 2010 @ 19:37:18

    One thing I hate is when a film always has the top being rimmed. I say if you lick it, you gotta stick it!

    Reply

  701. Plato
    Jul 22, 2010 @ 21:56:10

    The actor playing “Darryl” is Jesse Caron:

    http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0181875/fullcredits#cast

    Good lookin’ — but I had trouble finding pics of him.

    Thanks for the vidbit!

    Reply

  702. Natty
    Jul 27, 2010 @ 16:27:03

    I’m not a fan of the rimmed top, either, unless he REALLY seems to be into it.

    Reply

  703. Natty
    Jul 27, 2010 @ 16:27:32

    Thanks Ronny! Your response is just the type I’m hoping for.

    Reply

  704. Natty
    Jul 27, 2010 @ 16:28:40

    Plato – I Googled him too. Yeah, he seems to be under the radar – this IS a deleted scene after all. Maybe if the scene in question had turned into blowjob porn he would’ve gotten more famous.

    Reply

  705. davidk
    Jul 28, 2010 @ 08:04:39

    Wow this transcends the “suggestive.” Was CC flashing back to some boyhood near miss?

    Reply

  706. david
    Aug 13, 2010 @ 06:55:25

    “Make love, not war.”

    sorry, couldn’t resist. lol don’t kill me.

    Reply

  707. Natty
    Aug 13, 2010 @ 11:23:45

    David, you will be punished accordingly (i.e., hot Caribou Coffee enemas).

    Reply

  708. Natty
    Aug 15, 2010 @ 07:39:52

    Oh, I need to see that. I’m a Rock fan, I guess…okay, I’ll say it: I BET HE HAS A GREAT ASS. Christ, I’m such an ass queen.

    Reply

  709. david
    Aug 17, 2010 @ 19:20:38

    goddamn it; i wanted to read some hot father son action. i don’t suppose i could contest the results like gore did in the 2000 elections?

    Reply

  710. david
    Aug 17, 2010 @ 19:36:13

    btw, out of curiosity, does your boyfriend every ask you to write specifically themed stories for him?

    Reply

  711. Natty
    Aug 17, 2010 @ 19:59:27

    My boyfriend isn’t a big reader or much of an erotic fiction fan. But sometimes I make him read my stories, and I know they’re good if he gets a boner.

    Reply

  712. Anonymous
    Aug 27, 2010 @ 11:37:09

    HOLY CRAP how long are you going to tease us about the Seann William Scott story? Was that all just a big tease? I figured you had forgotten about us while you were working on your books, but then you come back, promise us your sweet, sweet porn, and then seemingly forget about it. YOU’RE MEAN! LOL

    Reply

    • Natty
      Aug 27, 2010 @ 15:21:29

      My god, I only started writing the damn thing two weeks ago. I would’ve gotten it done sooner had life not interfered, and by “life” I mean two car accidents in two days (yes, really). Anyway I finished the second draft this afternoon and I’m PSYCHED about it, going to post it probably this weekend.

      As Stifler might say, pull your panties out of your ass crack and chill, dude. And thanks for taking interest. ๐Ÿ™‚

      Reply

  713. Rick
    Aug 28, 2010 @ 14:14:41

    Well written story and it serve me well… It’s just that I get distracted by the “British” terms from those special nouns and verbs that a part of a story like this. Is the Friday Nifty Experience going to be a regular?

    Reply

  714. Natty
    Aug 28, 2010 @ 15:19:48

    Hey Rick, glad it did the trick. Yes, this is going to be a regular feature.

    Reply

  715. Natty
    Aug 30, 2010 @ 06:18:18

    Wow, Rob, thanks! I was really trying to get the voices right so that means a lot!

    Reply

  716. Natty
    Aug 31, 2010 @ 08:19:51

    BTW, because this post is sort of out of nowhere I thought I’d mention that the show “Huge” was written/conceived partly by Winnie Holtzman, who also created “My So-Called Life” which we all know is one of the best TV shows of all time. I’ve never seen an episode of “Huge” but I have been following the reviews, and this particular passage from The A.V. Club struck me.

    Reply

  717. Sera Sera
    Sep 02, 2010 @ 20:14:11

    FYI, dude. I clicked on your “That’s up to you” link and it failed. Fix!

    Reply

    • Natty
      Sep 02, 2010 @ 21:24:11

      Thanks, Sera. D’oh!

      Reply

  718. Sera Sera
    Sep 02, 2010 @ 20:16:46

    P.S. I am absolutely horrified and awed by how realistic this story is.

    Reply

  719. Ron
    Sep 02, 2010 @ 21:15:57

    Man love that illustration. It looks like i see a few drops of jizz on the keg. I can tell that this is gonna be a great read ๐Ÿ™‚

    Reply

    • Natty
      Sep 02, 2010 @ 21:24:27

      Ron – ’tis cum. Glad you’re excited.

      Reply

  720. Quiet Riot Girl
    Sep 05, 2010 @ 13:22:53

    Hi Natty
    I love Belle and Sebastian! I emailed you a while ago about a writing project called Games Perverts Play. I didn’t find a story from your site that fitted with the first collection theme: Objectified. But here is a link to it anyway, via Mark Simpson’s blog. Hope our next theme might chime with your writing more, when I know what it is! Quiet Riot Girl

    http://www.marksimpson.com/blog/2010/09/02/objectified/

    Reply

  721. Steve
    Sep 06, 2010 @ 19:32:16

    Honestly? I expected a scene to unfold from the first Pie where he drank the beer with the cum in it. It’s always been in the back of my head that a story was there for what if he liked the taste. Anywho, what I got was surprising and very, very good.

    Reply

  722. Natty
    Sep 07, 2010 @ 03:58:12

    Cool! Thanks for the link.

    Reply

  723. Natty
    Sep 07, 2010 @ 04:00:09

    Steve, there’s such a wealth of homoerotic Stifler behavior to choose from but in the end I had to go with where my imagination took me (and, for me, the key homoerotic SWS scene is the one in “Road Trip” where he gets fingered by the nurse, which I referenced). Glad you liked it!

    Reply

  724. Anon
    Sep 07, 2010 @ 22:45:46

    Check out his blog – jpm770 dot blogspot dot com.

    Reply

  725. Natty
    Sep 08, 2010 @ 06:43:39

    Thanks, Anon!

    Reply

  726. whey
    Sep 10, 2010 @ 11:12:44

    Definitely one of my all-time favorite reads of his — never fails to deliver. Another of his that I enjoyed, but isn’t on Nifty, is “Army Invasion” (http://www.gaystoriespost.com/Army-Invasion.html).

    Reply

  727. Steve
    Sep 10, 2010 @ 13:11:42

    Those two are goodies but the first two parts of STr8 Guys Messing Around were once my favorite until part three soured it. Ghost and Photo Shoot are now tied for the top spot.

    I s he still writing? The last time I had a link to his site it was shut down and the stories were starting to be much less well done than the four we’ve mentioned…

    Reply

  728. Natty
    Sep 10, 2010 @ 17:48:23

    whey – thanks for the link, I’m gonna go read that right now…

    Steve – As far as I know he’s been dormant for the last few years – no website and no new stories. I really liked the last few stories he put out, in particular “Helping Out Dad”: http://www.freegaysex.com/nifty/gay/encounters/dr-wallaces-casebook/dr-wallaces-casebook-5a

    Reply

  729. jkrs
    Sep 12, 2010 @ 18:23:19

    Sebastian Wallace… that’s a British writer, yeah? I can never get past the use of “arse” in print. And even worse– “willy”. Ugh.

    That said, I gave ‘Desperate Daniel’ a quick once-over just now. Whoa. Very hot.

    Reply

  730. Natty
    Sep 13, 2010 @ 08:41:57

    Yeah, jkrs, we’ve discussed this. British language doesn’t bother me, however I do have hated sex terms, specifically: spooge, tube steak.

    Reply

  731. jkrs
    Sep 16, 2010 @ 07:12:11

    Ah, i’d forgotten that conversation. And yet, i STILL find it amusing that SPOOOOOOGE bothers ya ๐Ÿ™‚

    Reply

  732. maxime
    Sep 17, 2010 @ 07:08:04

    you must be a complete idiot to put yourself on the Net like this

    Reply

  733. Dan
    Sep 19, 2010 @ 00:21:41

    I so wanted them to chase you down … As for blowing you, I’m not sure it can be done “kindly.”

    Reply

  734. arctic_jay
    Sep 23, 2010 @ 03:02:38

    The impetus for this project seems pointlessly cunty (constructive cuntiness I can tolerate). Unless, of course, they’re rebelling against an imaginary dearth of good sex writing for marketing purposes. It all does seem demographically engineered to make “sex-positive” types wet their panties. Rail against those fucking literary men (feminism!); giggle like schoolgirls while reading said men’s boneheaded erotic prose (fun feminism!).

    Also, this Gira Grant chick seems somewhat confused about her supporting arguments. Consider:

    “The problem with literary men who write literary sex scenes is that there’s a completely imaginary line between pornography and literature, and pornography has no time for your posturing and your irony because people only masturbate sincerely, and literature has no time for the pleasure of anything but literature, and good sex rarely makes for good literature, and pornography only yields to awkward and painful sex by accident.”

    “Weโ€™re post-porn, if anything. Cheap digital video and the internet killed the commercial juggernaut that is porn. Everyone can make porn now. People still only masturbate sincerely, even if they fuck ironically. If there were ever a time for literature to come in and fill the gap left by porn, this is it.”

    Firstly, how can we be in a post-porn world if everyone can make porn? The fact that everyone can make porn (and is making porn) means we’re in an era in which porn is having its greatest influence. That’s not “post”; that’s “during”. Also, if literature only generates pleasure solipsistically and is steeped in irony and posturing, how is it supposed to be the genre that will fill the void left by porn? And, if everyone is masturbating to porn make by their fellow, non-incorporated, citizens and masturbation is a sincere act, then what the fuck, exactly is her problem?

    Reading her statements on the homepage leave me wondering if she’s even capable of writing a single precise, coherent paragraph. It’s all word salad colored with an odd snarky yet glaringly sentimental tone.

    For Christ’s sake, has she even heard of Jean Genet?

    Reply

  735. Natty
    Sep 23, 2010 @ 08:40:38

    artic_jay, You make some good points but I wish you hadn’t dropped the big c-word – I’m trying to keep things civil around here. I agree that her arguments seem muddled, and they’re all predicated on this idea that good sex writing has yet to exist, which just seems absurd.

    Reply

  736. Matt G
    Sep 23, 2010 @ 09:59:58

    Hey Natty — as someone who’s a fan of your work and who is a friend of the C&C ladies (and someone who has a story in the book) let me assure you that their heart is/was in the right place. What’s important, I think, is not to worry about the particulars of whether this is somehow a ‘breakthrough’ in sex writing, because of course it’s probably not — people have been having sex and writing abt it since at least 2002 LOL — it’s just a collection of stories, some of which are better than others in my opinion. (You might h8 mine, for example!) But at least the compilation offers a variety of perspectives, which I think is a credit to the editors, and all of the stories, I think, were written in the spirit of frank, unsentimental writing abt sex, which is never easy. (Admittedly, I liked some more than others!) Most of all, it’s just a couple of genuinely nice ppl running things on a shoestring, and I’m sure if you met them, you’d be happy to know them, just as they would you. Trust me: we’re all on the same side here! xo MG

    Reply

  737. Natty
    Sep 23, 2010 @ 10:48:43

    Thanks for your perspective, Matt. Yes, indeed, many contemporary sex writing anthologies are stratified by gender/sexuality lines, so I do laud them for going that route. I’m all for a unified front!

    Reply

  738. arctic_jay
    Sep 24, 2010 @ 21:10:19

    If you want to maintain a certain tone for your blog, I can respect that. But I would like to point out that the editors of this book are shitting on an entire group of authors and ignoring an even larger group solely for the purpose of marketing. That’s neither civil or good-hearted.

    Reply

  739. Natty
    Sep 25, 2010 @ 14:10:35

    arctic_jay & Rob – I totally get your anger. But because I’m chronically disposed to seeing the other side of things I’ll say this: the idea of a revolution in art/literature, of youthful voice usurping the status quo, is time honored and often worthwhile. It’s an energizing, motivating thing to think “Nobody’s doing this but me/us!” I think we’ve all been there. Much great work has come out of it. It is also naive and probably best kept to one’s self unless you’re, I dunno, Karl Marx or the Marquis de Sade.

    Reply

  740. Rick
    Oct 06, 2010 @ 00:23:08

    “Go ahead. Do whatever turns you on. It’s OK with me.”

    Perfect.

    Reply

  741. Natty
    Oct 06, 2010 @ 05:18:16

    Je suis d’accord, Rick.

    Reply

  742. Rick
    Oct 12, 2010 @ 03:20:21

    I really like this story. The dialogue is classic. Just needs a little polish and formatting to make the dialogue pop.

    Shorter paragraphs maybe. Aw … I’m too particular I suppose.

    Reply

  743. Natty
    Oct 12, 2010 @ 05:13:50

    Yeah, Rick, when it comes to Nifty you sort of take what you can get.

    Reply

  744. Rick
    Oct 12, 2010 @ 14:58:57

    Drooling in anticipation!

    Reply

  745. Sera Sera
    Oct 14, 2010 @ 21:39:13

    Love you, you pervy, thieving homo.

    Reply

  746. Rick
    Oct 16, 2010 @ 10:06:59

    I remember that time in my life.

    A teenager cruising the magazine rack at Walgreens. Browsing magazines I had no interest in so that I could “casually” check out some soft porn … Exercise For Men Only, I think was my target.

    The camera in the plastic bubble on the ceiling supposedly watching for shoplifters when I knew it was really there to catch the queers looking at mostly nude hunky male bodies … like me.

    Putting the mag in my basket with half a dozen other items I really didn’t need but were there just to draw less attention to my quasi-homo selection.

    My heart beating so fast as I got home with my purchase and in the privacy of my own bedroom flipping through until I found the guy who would be the object of my fantasy for the moment.

    Thanks for this.

    Reply

  747. Rick
    Oct 16, 2010 @ 10:23:15

    Wow. Great story. Well written and easy to read.

    This and the previous “Straight Dan and Me” story remind me of a story by one of my favorite authors from the pre-internet paperback days.

    An author using the name Clay Caldwell wrote “Stud Shorts” with a story “Playing It Straight” about two co-workers on a business trip who got conveniently stuck in a hotel room together.

    Whatever happened to Clay Caldwell and who is he? Does he still write? I Google his name and can find Amazon books by him but no other info.

    Reply

  748. Rick
    Oct 16, 2010 @ 10:31:08

    By the way, just use the term “buddy” or “bud” in a story and you got my attention ๐Ÿ™‚

    Reply

  749. Natty
    Oct 17, 2010 @ 18:51:27

    Rick – never heard of the author but I definitely want to check that story out. I love the whole “co-workers share a bed on a trip” storyline. And I’m SO with you – “bud” does it for me every time.

    Reply

  750. Natty
    Oct 17, 2010 @ 18:54:07

    “Exercise for Men Only”! God I loved that magazine. I wonder if it’s still produced? Last I checked the sleazier muscle mags (such as that one) were being pretty blatant about their audience, including ads for muscle worship and outright gay videos in the back pages.

    Your story reminded me of buying my first porno mag when I turned eighteen. I bought an issue of Playgirl and included an issue of Playboy, just to confuse and draw less attention from the clerk. Hilarious!

    Reply

  751. Dwight Supremacy
    Oct 20, 2010 @ 16:08:00

    They all sound interesting, but you really make me wanna read Stuck Rubber Baby! I have the memory of a gnat so I hope I remember to check it out!

    Reply

  752. lito
    Oct 23, 2010 @ 08:45:01

    you’re my hero! just remember though, being judgmental alone doesn’t make us good or bad people. but seriously, you’re awesome!!!

    Reply

  753. Natty
    Oct 23, 2010 @ 18:27:06

    True true Lito, and in fact I wasn’t too keen on that observation myself so I ditched it.

    Reply

  754. Rick Buddy
    Oct 24, 2010 @ 10:11:01

    I’m speechless. This is good.

    Reply

  755. Sera Sera
    Oct 24, 2010 @ 20:29:39

    “Iโ€™d rather listen than dismiss.” I enjoy that line, Natty cake! Good foundation for a mantra.

    Reply

  756. Sera Sera
    Oct 24, 2010 @ 20:31:27

    Why the hell was I not informed of this obvious work of awesomeness?

    Reply

  757. RobbyG
    Oct 24, 2010 @ 23:00:24

    Always thought that Sebastian Wallace was one of the best writers of erotic fiction (?) on the ‘Net. Have greatly missed him — though a story popped up on “Men On The Net” couple years back, “Riding The Tube,” that mimmicked his style (with the curious “seb_ghost_writer” pseudonym) so perfectly that I was convinced he had made a brief return (though the e-mail had an American “edu” address).

    Anyway, this site very nicely collected all of Sebastian’s stories, http://www.screeve.org/nonhosted/wallace.shtml. I think the “Life at College” stuff was his best in terms of sustained quality. The above-mentioned outstanding “Army Invasion” and “Straight Guys Messing About” are both from that period.

    Reply

  758. RobbyG
    Oct 24, 2010 @ 23:35:34

    Correction: I meant to say that the stories from the “Life As a Student” (not “College”) period were Wallace’s best.

    Reply

  759. Rick Buddy
    Oct 25, 2010 @ 00:16:12

    How did this post sneak by me?

    Well, anyway. Now you got me thinking about way back when I was the “older cousin”. Now I know that was healthy sexual experimentation. Thanks for that!

    Singing birds. That is too weird.

    Reply

  760. Natty
    Oct 25, 2010 @ 08:39:49

    His others are worth checking out, too.

    Reply

  761. Natty
    Oct 25, 2010 @ 08:44:50

    Thanks RobbyG, that’s a nice compendium. I corresponded with Seb a couple times back in the day, he told me what I pretty much already knew: he just loses interest in his writing to the point where he doesn’t even think about it. So hopefully some day soon we’ll see some more. I thought his most recent stories, in particular “Helping Out Dad,” was up there with some of his best work.

    Reply

  762. Rick
    Oct 26, 2010 @ 09:50:37

    “Keep doing that and youโ€™ll cum, except youโ€™ll cum in my butt and it wonโ€™t go everywhere like when you jack off, which is cool.”

    Wow. Healthy sexual experimentation at its best.

    I remember back then when “it going everywhere” was a practical problem and cleaning up the stuff was a burden. Times have changed.

    You captured ground zero for me. I had a very similar experience at age 12 six months before we moved away from the neighborhood I grew up in.

    That night in his tree-house I was laying on my stomach and my best buddy, a year older than me showed me how to “artificial fuck” as he called it. We used lots of spit.

    We had already experimented with jacking each other off and laying on top of each other and rubbing together, that kind of messing around.

    What a wild six months in that tree house.

    Thanks for this.

    Reply

  763. Natty
    Oct 26, 2010 @ 17:06:37

    Thanks for your story Rick. It’s a lot more authentic than mine, which is merely a fantasy based on things I wished I’d done. I was a really fearful and aware child, and anything sexual made me run for the hills. I had ample opportunity to experiment and never did, hence the fact that I write all these stories about what could have been.

    Reply

  764. Steve
    Oct 26, 2010 @ 22:47:26

    One of your best ever. I’m always grateful you share on here…

    Reply

  765. Natty
    Oct 27, 2010 @ 05:23:50

    Thanks Steve! One thing is that there’s just no place for a story like this EXCEPT Nifty and this website.

    Reply

  766. mizzy
    Nov 01, 2010 @ 02:07:27

    The Player with Jeff Palmer and Kyle McKenna is the hottest , watching top Jeff putting Kyle through it,

    Reply

  767. Notatourist
    Nov 03, 2010 @ 16:53:29

    Your talent for writing and Michael Kirwan’s talent for illustrating should be an amazing and sizzling combination. Did you get to see some of the art in production? What did you think? When will we get to read and “see” Backwoods?

    Reply

  768. Natty
    Nov 03, 2010 @ 18:03:15

    Thanks Notatourist. The book is scheduled to be released April 1 of next year. Michael has sent me all the art he’s completed thus far and it’s pretty fantastic. I’ve posted some samples on this blog, search em out.

    Reply

  769. Stuart Foulkes
    Nov 07, 2010 @ 04:35:24

    Where’s your Facebook Page ? Have you taken it off ?

    I’m still concerned about Reggie the cat ? and you ofcourse !Stu x

    Reply

  770. Johnny Murdoc
    Nov 08, 2010 @ 09:25:28

    Hey, man! I’m happy to hear he came back! That’s so awesome, I want to say “congratulations!” or something to that extent, but I don’t think there’s a specific word for “Your cat came back!” So, yeah, just know that I’m happy for you.

    Reply

  771. Natty
    Nov 08, 2010 @ 10:26:28

    Thanks Johnny! I saw your comment on Tumblr about making it into a children’s book: that’s so funny, because a few years ago my stepdaughter and I wrote a book about the fictional adventures of my other cat, Puffy. I wrote and she illustrated.

    Reply

  772. Stuart Foulkes
    Nov 14, 2010 @ 17:21:40

    Belated congrats Natty ! – I desperatly wanted to keep up to date on this matter and then you went off Facebook – despite me contacting your sister ( who I believe email you on my behalf ) I couldn’t get anymore news.
    Then I left a message on your main wall – but that didn’t get me anywhere
    Main thing is you and Reggie are well, and hopefully you’ll look into getting that thing I recommended in a previous message to you ( http://www.loc8tor.com ) cos all my cats
    ( erm.. well I only have 2 ) are ” tagged ” and believe me I’ve used it to ” page them ” alot ! – Hugs – Stuart – UK

    Reply

  773. QUIET RIOT GIRL
    Nov 20, 2010 @ 14:45:25

    Hi Natty
    I haven’t read C and C but I have it on order and am looking forward to it. But I know what you mean about the way the editors overlook a lot of great writing about sex in literature and in specific ‘sex’ writing/porn/erotica if we are going to make any distinctions.

    I say I am looking forward to it. but I have now read Sex Scene Anthology which -almost literally- blew my head off! so it will be hard to impress me now. It is free on pdf or you can order a copy. Its made by writers based in US, UK and elsewhere and is amazing.

    http://quietgirlriot.wordpress.com/2010/10/20/sex-scene-anthology/

    There is a great sex scene in Goodbye to Berlin by Isherwood. I say great. The sex is barely mentioned but the build-up and aftermath are so brilliantly observed it has stayed in my mind in a very vivid way.

    QRG x

    Reply

  774. Quiet Riot Girl
    Nov 20, 2010 @ 14:48:10

    sorry didnt mean to caps lock my name!

    also I think the title Coming And Crying is pretty inspired. they deserve some credit for that at least!

    Reply

  775. Zane
    Nov 22, 2010 @ 15:09:32

    Thanks guys! Glad you are enjoying them! ๐Ÿ™‚

    Reply

  776. Confessions
    Nov 23, 2010 @ 13:19:01

    Glad to hear you got yourcat back. I miss having a cat. The place I live in now won’t allow me. Maybe I will sneak one in. LOL

    Reply

  777. davidk
    Nov 24, 2010 @ 17:44:10

    Maybe Reggie had a Fortean experience, alien abduction or something.

    Reply

  778. Rick
    Nov 27, 2010 @ 00:24:23

    Thanks for this series. I hope you continue it. I can only imagine how much material you must read to find the gems that you share here.

    Buddy, I read every story and always find a special part that I really enjoy!

    Reply

  779. Natty
    Nov 27, 2010 @ 07:15:33

    Thanks Rick. I’ve been slacking on my blog duties but your comment has convinced me to keep it going.

    Reply

  780. lito
    Nov 28, 2010 @ 19:38:40

    yes! keep it up. i love your ideas.. and, for whatever it’s worth, taking a year off as a creative person is not only desirable at some points, but necessary. i’ve learned that if i give in to what i need, i find ways to recharge, and that’s just as much a part of the creative process as producing work.

    Reply

  781. Natty
    Nov 28, 2010 @ 19:55:31

    Thanks lito! Yeah, my challenge lately is finding ways to stay occupied while at the same time not getting hung up on shit I *should* be doing.

    Reply

  782. Georges B.
    Nov 29, 2010 @ 02:29:09

    Hey Natty,
    I am following your blog silently now sind 2009 and always liked what you posted, although I must admit I liked the older ones (frome the beginning 2000er-years a little bit more).
    I loved your ideas about the rave scen, about drugs and about male – male desire; my boyfriend and me are very curious about your book “Backwoods” and I hope we will be able to purchase it, since we are living in Germany.Your blog and your stories (Man, especially the Story about the Iraqui Sniper in BUTT) always inspire my fantasies and I like to come across your blog every day. I hope your are feeling a bit better in Winter now and everything will turn out good (Does that soudn cheesy? In German, people would say such things as final words )

    Would love to read more from you!

    Greetings:

    George B. from Cold Northern Germany

    Reply

  783. Johnny Murdoc
    Nov 29, 2010 @ 10:08:36

    Hey man,

    I’m happy to see that a blog post titled “I Give Up” ends with the warning that you’re going to be posting more. I was worried that it would be the opposite. I know that keeping a blog up can be a struggle, especially for someone who sees their focus being something other than blogging. It’s easy to get caught up in what you think that people want to see from you. Just remember, it’s your blog. It’s your name at the top. If it means writing more, write more. If it means writing less, write less.

    Stay hard,
    -J

    Reply

  784. Steve
    Nov 29, 2010 @ 12:14:30

    This is the only blog I check in with every day in hopes of new content so this is good news. BTW, I’ve been meaning to ask for some time, since I see the author listed to the right on your blog, but have you read Pawn to Queen 4 by Lars Eighner. I’ve read it twice and I think I’m gonna have to read it a third time soon. It and The Deal by Becky Cochrane and Timothy Lambert are two of my favorite books ever, let alone favorite gay themed books…

    Reply

  785. Natty
    Nov 29, 2010 @ 13:56:13

    Georges, Johnny – thanks guys, I appreciate it. I always go through natural cycles of interest with my blog and I’ve just been on a downswing. Winter is coming and I need to shake everything up so I don’t stagnate, so I’m doing a lot of brainstorming and so far so good.

    Steve – Pawn to Queen Four is one of the only ones of Eighner’s I haven’t read. Somebody else recommended it to me recently, I’ll have to check it out. I loved “Travels with Lizbeth” and he’s pretty much my porn-writing hero, “Wank” and “B.M.O.C.” have been huge inspirations for me.

    Reply

  786. Rick
    Nov 29, 2010 @ 18:04:04

    Just right! Thanks for continuing the series. This one is a winner. From 1999?

    Reply

  787. Steve
    Nov 30, 2010 @ 09:58:17

    Wank is wonderful!

    Reply

  788. Steve
    Nov 30, 2010 @ 12:34:20

    Has anyone ever mashed up the two versions of Cobrastyle? I hated Robyn’s when I first heard it on So You Think You Can Dance but it’s grown on me big time since…

    Reply

  789. Natty
    Nov 30, 2010 @ 18:42:26

    I never heard the Teddybear’s version until you mentioned it. Me like!

    Reply

  790. Natty
    Nov 30, 2010 @ 18:48:21

    Glad you dig, Rick. Yeah it’s an old one. I get most of these stories from an old file I started back in the day of my favorite Nifty stories. It’s migrated with me through three or more computers over the years and finally has a purpose.

    Reply

  791. Travis
    Nov 30, 2010 @ 22:10:31

    I know I’m going to sound like a huge bible thumper when I say this, however I’m not, the ” I Am” statement comes from the bible when Moses asked the burning bush (God), “Who are you?” And God responds something akin to, “I Am that I Am.” I don’t really know the whole quote but that’s where it comes from.

    btw that link at the bottom of the post was funny/ironic as all get out, and I love your writings they’re great!! ๐Ÿ™‚ ๐Ÿ™‚ ๐Ÿ™‚

    Reply

  792. arctic_jay
    Dec 03, 2010 @ 02:42:08

    It just means, “I have come in my father’s name.” It’s a leftover from German grammar where verbs that indicate movement use the auxiliary verb “to be” instead of “to have.”

    Reply

  793. Natty
    Dec 03, 2010 @ 07:41:03

    arctic_jay – that sounds even dirtier.

    Reply

  794. david
    Dec 03, 2010 @ 18:32:03

    after all of my experience, i’m still surprised at how fucking weird people are.

    Reply

  795. arctic_jay
    Dec 03, 2010 @ 19:48:34

    Hahaha, it totally does. Would make a great last line of a Christian erotic story, though. I think I might just write one that uses it, just so it exists.

    Reply

  796. Steve
    Dec 04, 2010 @ 03:15:06

    And since the Old Testament dudes couldn’t say the name of their god he was often called I Am or the Great I Am but if you want creepy, the Church is said to be the bride of Christ in the New Testament. From the very first time I heard that my mind went right to the wedding night. Ewww!

    Reply

  797. lito
    Dec 04, 2010 @ 17:19:11

    mmm.

    Reply

  798. Quiet Riot Girl
    Dec 05, 2010 @ 06:19:58

    random shit is fine by me. You are in my top ten blogs of 2010 I will post the list when it’s up on my blog!

    Reply

  799. Natty
    Dec 05, 2010 @ 11:33:42

    Thanks, Quiet Riot Girl, that’s awesome!

    Reply

  800. david
    Dec 12, 2010 @ 08:10:33

    fuck! now i have to find an excuse to post this on a forum as a reply. it’s too good to let it go to waste.

    Reply

  801. Dwight Supremacy
    Dec 12, 2010 @ 22:23:12

    lol. love it. you know, I STILL haven’t seen more than 10 minutes of this movie?

    Reply

  802. Natty
    Dec 13, 2010 @ 05:46:31

    Thanks david!

    OMG Dwight, what are you waiting for? I just watched it again for like the hundredth time, it continues to confound/amaze/entertain.

    Reply

  803. horniman
    Dec 23, 2010 @ 17:06:23

    best film version of Alice in Wonderland is Jonathan Miller’s black and white version from 1966 made for the BBC – available on DVD

    Reply

  804. seth
    Dec 24, 2010 @ 11:39:02

    you can download life during wartime and enter the void on btjunkie, if you know how to do that sort of thing. been on there for months. plus, it’s awards season, so all the for your consideration copies are floating around, and so the artier, award bait type films typically end up on the torrent sites, too. i know you’re on a budget!

    Reply

  805. Natty
    Dec 24, 2010 @ 12:00:24

    Thanks, Seth. Life During Wartime I could do, but with Enter the Void I’m going to wait for a Pittsburgh theatrical release, especially since the general consensus is the visuals are the only thing it’s got going for it (though, apparently, that’s a LOT).

    Reply

  806. david
    Dec 25, 2010 @ 17:36:31

    out of curiosity, when you were a kid what did you want to be when you grew up?

    Reply

  807. Natty
    Dec 25, 2010 @ 19:24:06

    david – Great question. In the first grade we were asked to draw a picture of who we wanted to be when we grew up. I wrote that I wanted to be an artist, and in the picture I was painting on an easel.

    I was not painting a dick.

    Reply

  808. davidk
    Dec 26, 2010 @ 08:51:57

    This story was a great pleasure. I suggest marketing it as a board game.

    Reply

  809. Write every day : Johnny Murdoc
    Dec 26, 2010 @ 10:26:10

    […] Christmas Eve, Natty Soltesz posted a fantastic entry on his blog called “My (Legitimate) Sob Story.” What he writes in it is true for me, it’s true for nearly every other artist you […]

    Reply

  810. Ron
    Dec 26, 2010 @ 18:04:46

    Man, another hot story by Natty!!! It was great as usual. Love it man.

    Reply

  811. Natty
    Dec 27, 2010 @ 08:28:26

    Thanks guys. davidk, love the idea. We could market it to frat houses.

    Reply

  812. david
    Dec 30, 2010 @ 12:29:35

    do you find that you and your boyfriend have the same taste in men?

    Reply

  813. Natty
    Dec 30, 2010 @ 20:05:25

    Yes and no.

    Reply

  814. Natty
    Dec 30, 2010 @ 21:52:23

    My friend SeraSera was just talking about watching “Fear.” I really need to see creepy stalker Marky Mark.

    Reply

  815. Johnny Murdoc
    Jan 01, 2011 @ 00:33:34

    Thanks, Natty!

    Reply

  816. david
    Jan 01, 2011 @ 02:42:17

    poor kid. i wonder how his life is now.

    Reply

  817. big 8 incher
    Jan 08, 2011 @ 00:28:33

    hot would you send me your dirty underwere realdirty like a weeks woren piss and cum

    Reply

  818. Woodman
    Jan 20, 2011 @ 18:29:02

    Each one of these is just really cool. I’m piecing together a message for one … and then I think, maybe Natty is just fucking with my head!

    How do you create these? Photoshop, cut and paste?

    Reply

    • Natty
      Jan 21, 2011 @ 05:30:43

      Thanks Woodman. Nothing but a bunch of old cut up books and some Mod Podge.

      Reply

  819. Steve
    Jan 21, 2011 @ 11:51:48

    Take your time. It’s only the internet. ‘Sides, occasional content from you has proven far more rewarding than constant posts from most other blogs I visit…

    Reply

  820. Woodman
    Jan 22, 2011 @ 05:09:42

    Wow! I’m really impressed. These are actual, hold-in-your-hand, touch and feel collagss like we made in eight grade art class.

    That may not seem like a big deal but these days everything seems to be digitally created and edited.

    You actually got sticky hands making these.

    We’ll miss you but whatever is going on, take care of yourself.

    Rick

    Reply

  821. Stuart
    Jan 27, 2011 @ 17:17:45

    Hi Nat

    Like Steve said , take things at your own pace. Your blog on your cat going missing had me on tender hooks then all went quiet – thankfully the cats sorted out, now us dear readers can be paitent again till the time is right for you to continue were you left off
    Stu x

    Reply

  822. John
    Feb 04, 2011 @ 06:53:28

    I like UKNM and MAP, hot, muscled, hairy, manly MEN!! And Map guys start out in suits. I also like Kristen Bjorn’s casting couch series.

    I just saw a clip of a supposed straight guy named Neil Stevens and a british gay guy. The interviewer asked Neil if he had ever done guy on guy porn. He smirked and said no. But at Map he has sucked, rimmed, fucked, and been fucked multiple times. He’s a hot guy, so I excused his lame acting in this clip. grin

    Reply

  823. dex
    Feb 05, 2011 @ 08:34:10

    I agree with u about sean cody i only vid that did it for me was bailey’s fuck buddy . that was hawt!

    Reply

  824. BrotherBob
    Feb 07, 2011 @ 10:35:27

    Natty, I hope you are OK. You seem to be going back and reposting some wistful entries. Whatever is getting to you, know that you will always have your fans and friends.

    Reply

  825. Natty
    Feb 07, 2011 @ 11:22:58

    Thanks, BrotherBob. I’m doing fine, really.

    Reply

  826. davidk
    Feb 08, 2011 @ 09:08:59

    All cheer to you Natty. February is the season of reposting.

    Reply

  827. Quiet Riot Girl
    Feb 16, 2011 @ 12:26:06

    relevant to my interests…

    Reply

  828. Eric
    Feb 28, 2011 @ 21:50:52

    Nice to hear you’re still alive, and can’t wait to read your book!

    Reply

  829. Rick
    Mar 01, 2011 @ 00:11:06

    Good! This is all good. You are the best!

    Reply

  830. Natty
    Mar 01, 2011 @ 08:07:04

    Thanks guys!

    Reply

  831. ed
    Mar 01, 2011 @ 15:33:33

    Can’t wait for the book Natty ๐Ÿ™‚

    Reply

  832. Georges Bataille
    Mar 02, 2011 @ 02:28:37

    I hope there will be an easy way to get your book send to Germany….I cannot wait for this work of erotic art.

    Reply

  833. Natty
    Mar 02, 2011 @ 09:49:23

    Thanks, ed.

    Georges Bataille, I thought you were from France! And dead! Just kidding. I’m sure it can get to Germany.

    Reply

  834. Eric
    Mar 03, 2011 @ 17:45:38

    omg! is that a blurb from dennis cooper?!? you are officially god now… (you know, besides cooper)…

    Reply

  835. Natty
    Mar 03, 2011 @ 19:08:42

    Haha, thanks Eric! As a writer I’m not fit to lick Cooper’s boots, of course, but he’s a super guy and he and his community have been an unmeasurable boon to my writing career.

    Reply

  836. lito
    Mar 03, 2011 @ 19:11:59

    that’s pretty slammin! love it!!

    Reply

  837. Rick
    Mar 04, 2011 @ 00:28:47

    The Stephen King of mansex! I love it

    Reply

  838. Georges Bataille
    Mar 04, 2011 @ 02:25:48

    You probably hear that a thousand times or so…but your new Facebook-Pic gives me shivers….and, yes, I mean in a phallic way….
    Will there be a nice pic of the author on the cover?, hehe ;=)
    Oh and the praise by Joe Gage is wonderful!

    Reply

  839. Steve
    Mar 05, 2011 @ 12:32:18

    I love this series! I’m already following it and it has a depth I did not expect…

    Reply

  840. VP
    Mar 05, 2011 @ 17:26:54

    Please start promoting your Anonymous Sex Confessions tubmlr again – I love it!

    Reply

  841. Natty
    Mar 05, 2011 @ 22:52:06

    Steve, I’ve only read the first part but I liked it a lot. As soon as I get a chance I’m going to delve into the rest.

    Reply

  842. Steve
    Mar 17, 2011 @ 20:51:35

    You may not post stories as often as others but the ones you do post are well worth the wait. This one was awesome! Thank you…

    Reply

  843. Ronny
    Mar 18, 2011 @ 10:32:09

    Totally agree with Steve. Cant wait to see your new book next month. I will be ready for it.

    Reply

  844. Natty
    Mar 18, 2011 @ 23:33:40

    Thanks, guys!

    Reply

  845. Steve
    Mar 19, 2011 @ 12:23:56

    BTW, will begging get the other installments? ‘Cause, I’ll beg like you’ve never seen if it would help…

    Reply

  846. Chester
    Mar 21, 2011 @ 15:23:29

    Am new to your writing, but I really like what I’ve read of your stuff so far. Looking forward to the book.

    Reply

  847. Chester
    Mar 22, 2011 @ 11:19:45

    When I was 17, there was a guy in our area who listed his services in the classified for “massages for men, by men”. The guy even put his address down there: I guess he was desperate for business. I was so turned on thinking that this was happening in my sleepy town that I wrote the guy and told him about all the lewd things I thought he’d be getting up to. I jacked off while writing the letter. I mailed it but I never gave a return address. I wonder what he thought of it.

    Reply

  848. Natty
    Mar 22, 2011 @ 11:47:09

    Wow, Chester, that is really cool. Just last year I was moving and had to get rid of a bunch of my old gay porn magazines. I bagged them up then went to a street where there is a bunch off-campus college housing, and left them on a random porch.

    Reply

  849. Steve
    Apr 09, 2011 @ 02:04:55

    Bearing underway! Oh, and what about a guest blogger sometimes? Ask for a topic and a short essay and have them emailed to you. The best get cut and pasted and since you have this erroneous feeling we mind long waits between your content it would help you relax some…

    Reply

  850. Natty
    Apr 09, 2011 @ 05:42:05

    Steve, I might be too much of a control freak for that, but it’s an interesting idea and it’s got me thinking.

    Reply

  851. Steve
    Apr 10, 2011 @ 05:42:32

    You could always post the other two parts of that story from the other week if you’re feeling really guilty. Not too self-serving a suggestion, right?

    Reply

  852. Zane
    Apr 16, 2011 @ 22:09:51

    Thanks as always for your support!

    Reply

  853. Dwight Supremacy
    Apr 26, 2011 @ 20:45:54

    LOL. รœber gay face!

    Reply

  854. Why Sex? by Natty Soltesz : Johnny Murdoc
    Apr 27, 2011 @ 07:35:28

    […] Soltesz is the author of the upcoming novel, Backwoods out this summer from Rebel Satori Press, and innumerable gay erotic short stories. You can find him […]

    Reply

  855. Quiet Riot Girl
    Apr 28, 2011 @ 09:38:40

    Love the cover pic- very Tom of Finland!

    Congratulations on the book. I haven’t finished mine I hope I do soon. It is bugging the hell out of me.

    QRG
    x

    Reply

  856. Natty
    Apr 28, 2011 @ 12:10:35

    Thanks, Quiet Riot Girl! And godspeed on your work…

    Reply

  857. lito
    May 03, 2011 @ 20:58:48

    don’t feel so much pressure to innovate every day/entry on here. we love u just the way you are. maybe this could be a place to chill. verbally, anyway.

    Reply

  858. Quiet Riot Girl
    May 06, 2011 @ 06:14:53

    congrats on the collage!

    I read Coming and Crying by the way. I liked it, but I know what you mean about it claiming it was doing something new that it wasn’t. The pieces I liked best were the story about the homo porn actor/rent boy. The image of him kneeling on the porn towel has stayed with me!

    And the one about the bisexual woman responding to personal ads and getting the fuck of her life from someone unexpected.

    Reply

  859. Joel
    May 13, 2011 @ 01:16:30

    by far my favorite model from any of those you listed is Patrick, from Sean Cody. the man is gorgeous and he has a big cock, but damn if he doesn’t love getting fucked. he quit doing porn because he wanted to marry his girlfriend…. I’ve never mourned the end of a career as much as i did his. Luke is another really hot model, he gets fucked by a HUGE dicked guy, and there’s one part where he’s riding it and clearly enjoying himself… watched that scene so many times.

    Reply

  860. Remember when? : Johnny Murdoc
    May 13, 2011 @ 11:11:45

    […] Over on his blog, Natty Soltesz shares a story from Letters to Penthouse VIII: […]

    Reply

  861. Quiet Riot Girl
    May 14, 2011 @ 11:14:47

    Ok Natty I am going to ask you a logistical question.

    When you ‘jack off to’ a story, how do you do it? Because I love to read porn, but I find that it just doesn’t go with actual masturbation. I am right handed, for example, and prefer to both hold a book and masturbate with my ‘dominant hand’. I could go on but I expect you and your readers don’t want to hear about my failed attempts at wanking and reading. Suffice to say, I tend to read first, jack off later.

    What’s your trick? And do you ever spunk on the pages?

    Reply

  862. Quiet Riot Girl
    May 15, 2011 @ 00:30:20

    P.s. great story. I will ‘save it for later’.

    You’re right. That is by if not a professional writer, at least a writer.

    Reply

  863. Natty
    May 16, 2011 @ 10:10:50

    Geez, Quiet Riot Girl, I suppose I’ve never really considered it before. I’m right handed, I suppose I just hold the book in my left hand and do what I will with the right hand. It’s not ideal, I’ll grant you, but necessity is the mother of invention, as they say, which is why I was able to jack off to department store catalogs (underwear section) when I was twelve.

    And no, I don’t ever spunk on pages.

    Reply

  864. Steve
    May 16, 2011 @ 12:17:30

    A) My last job had urinals in the men’s room made by a company with the same name as the paper company that employed my late grandmother. Try pissing for five and a half years and always thinking of grandma when you do…

    2) Nivea makes something called Happiness Lotion and for the majority of the time I was Cosmetics/Health & Beauty Department Manager none came in. I loved walking up to coworkers and telling them Walmart had run out of Happiness to with little or no explanation…

    Reply

  865. eric
    May 16, 2011 @ 22:14:42

    Just wanted to tell you that I think you are a wonderful person… ๐Ÿ™‚

    Reply

  866. Quiet Riot Girl
    May 17, 2011 @ 09:33:14

    I think I am a bit autistic. I can’t quite deal with holding a book in my left hand (or doing what I will with my left hand either)!

    Thanks for answering!

    Reply

  867. lito
    May 18, 2011 @ 09:17:24

    this is why we love reading your work. thank you!!! gus is awesome and it sucks.

    Reply

  868. Natty
    May 18, 2011 @ 11:01:46

    Aww, thanks guys!

    Reply

  869. Mike
    May 23, 2011 @ 12:28:40

    Sorry that things have been so rough on you lately, and I hope they look up soon.

    Reply

  870. Steve
    Jun 10, 2011 @ 12:44:57

    Come on, you had to have known ‘football team gang bang’ would lead from the start! The only trick is to whether to go with classic motivation and just make it scorching or try something new. The best I can come up with off the top of my head is a team possessed by very horny gay ghosts or at least most of them…

    Reply

  871. Rick
    Jun 11, 2011 @ 01:50:06

    I think Zach has an appointment, as I recall. Dr. Craig (now I have a visual, Christopher Meloni!) needs to work his way up to five of those fat fingers and then that “apple”, poised at the entrance, won’t have to back off.

    The gang bang part can come in chapter 45.

    It’s really good to see some activity here, Natty. I miss the Friday story too.

    Reply

  872. Natty
    Jun 11, 2011 @ 06:43:07

    Thanks fellas! I’m doing what I can.

    Reply

  873. Quiet Riot Girl
    Jun 12, 2011 @ 05:52:49

    yes ‘actual feminism’ doesn’t exist anymore. This is Feminism 2.0

    Reply

  874. Laurie
    Jun 14, 2011 @ 18:04:58

    Oh riot grrl feminism, I remember you so fondly. Nowadays girls are growing up in a world where it’s perfectly normal to hear Rihanna singing about whips and chains and Katy Perry getting probed by an alien on pop radio and idolize Kim Kardashian whose only real claim to fame is a sex tape but it’s NOT unacceptable to talk about condoms and birth control in high school health class. What?! Also, talking about Feminism 2.0, I read an interesting book about the history of Nancy Drew that talked about how this has been a historical issue for women – one generation would make great strides for their gender and the next would flush it all down the drain – apparently the suffragettes were NOT so keen on the 1920 flapper girls that came after them. ๐Ÿ™‚ Sorry I went off on a completely unrelated tangent there, but yes, thanks for bringing up this song!

    Reply

  875. Steve
    Jun 16, 2011 @ 13:22:24

    Can’t wait for the new addition. You’re one of my favorite authors. If I send you $5, will you do the Chris Meloni story, anyway?

    Reply

  876. Quiet Riot Girl
    Jun 18, 2011 @ 08:49:21

    I love the 1920s flapper girls! I think they were riot grrl in their own way, as is Rihanna.

    But it is all individuated now I think. Each girl for him or herself!

    Reply

  877. Rob
    Jun 25, 2011 @ 01:28:16

    Came here for the porn… but shed a tear over Mr. Gus. I just lost my dear sweet cat Shaniqua, so I know how it feels. There’s a website called Petloss.com which is filled with people and stuff that will help! Anyway, dude… I’m gonna get back to the porn, but best wishes.

    Reply

  878. Natty
    Jun 25, 2011 @ 05:45:10

    Thanks Rob, take care of yourself.

    Reply

  879. Steve
    Jun 30, 2011 @ 11:33:27

    Don’t be embarrassed! It’s a timeless commentary and pretty much on the money…

    Reply

  880. Quiet Riot Girl
    Jul 02, 2011 @ 08:18:51

    Excellent piece. I am retroactively enamoured by your 16 year-old self.

    I think Mark Simpson would have been proud to have written that.
    His concept of the ‘metrosexual’ is partly to do with the end of alternative youth ‘subcultures’ I think.

    Reply

  881. Laurie
    Jul 03, 2011 @ 09:32:57

    This article was a watershed moment in my young life! Okay, slight exaggeration, but I do remember reading it and thinking that I really needed to sign up for Journalism. Also, it’s just as good now as it was then, and I got a nice trip down memory lane recalling some of the “alternative” stuff that was going on at BHS back then. Memories!! ๐Ÿ™‚

    Reply

  882. Natty
    Jul 04, 2011 @ 19:18:02

    Laurie, that is awesome and flattering considering your distinguished high school journalism career. Those were the days…

    Reply

  883. Quiet Riot Girl
    Jul 17, 2011 @ 05:33:46

    Your disinterest was worrying me too!

    But now I know you are still writing and tumblin’ I am less worried.

    I have a new edition of Games Perverts Play due out soon. The theme is ‘paraphilia’. If you can think of any stories that relate to that theme, I’d love to put one up. I wondered if an ‘incest’ story might fit?

    http://www.gamespervertsplay.wordpress.com

    Reply

    • Natty
      Jul 21, 2011 @ 06:41:59

      Thanks QRGirl! I happen to be making this comment through the brand! new! internet connection in my apartment. I’m definitely interested in contributing something to Games Perverts Play – I’ve always wanted to do an objectosexual porno story. So we’ll see, I’m busy as hell lately.

      Reply

  884. rick
    Jul 21, 2011 @ 01:19:57

    stroking here at 3 am, as much as i disdain the word faggot in my porn, this is the third visit to read. (I meant every word of what I had just told him)

    excellent.

    Reply

  885. Steve
    Jul 23, 2011 @ 04:20:05

    What a nice story! It had one of the sweetest endings I’ve ever read in erotics, that’s for sure…

    Reply

  886. Eric
    Jul 25, 2011 @ 20:24:57

    i heard from a friend that rebel satori can be slow. when he first told me about his book (pre-publication), he said they weren’t communicating with him much and he was wondering what was going on. a year later (this year) it was published. i’m guessing it’s the same with any small press. Karen Tei Yamashita said that her book I Hotel took a couple of years to get printed cuz the press (Coffee House Press) didn’t have funds in the first place to print it.

    Anyway, looking forward to the book! ๐Ÿ™‚

    Reply

    • Natty
      Jul 29, 2011 @ 12:43:03

      Thanks for the info, Eric!

      Reply

  887. Mike
    Aug 10, 2011 @ 17:27:58

    Congratulations! Looking forward to seeing it when it comes out. I enjoyed your previous one.

    Best,
    Mike

    Reply

  888. Steve
    Aug 10, 2011 @ 20:41:00

    Great news!

    Reply

  889. Thelma23
    Aug 13, 2011 @ 11:18:43

    Sweet and touching anecdote…I remember coming/cumming across M2M jackoff magazines in a well known gay cruising park in Toronto, (David Balfour). At the time I figured they were from lonely guys who had no other outlet, came to the park in vain hope and instead jacked off instead, before going home to the wife and kids in the suburb. I felt it my duty in solidarity to donate my 5/6 spritz worth across those pages in support. Other times in that park in broad daylight, were some of the greatest particpatory orgies I have experienced in or out of a bathouse….good times!

    Reply

  890. Str8 but Curious - Johnny Murdoc
    Aug 16, 2011 @ 19:30:46

    […] but soon it will be available as a .pdf directly from Natty. I’ll try to keep you updated. You can read a sample from one of the stories, “My Best Friend’s Boyfriend,” over …. Sharejohnnymurdoc.com | Follow RSS | Find Johnny Murdoc on: Facebook | Twitter […]

    Reply

  891. Quiet Riot Girl
    Aug 18, 2011 @ 13:00:43

    Oh I hope you write it. I thought of writing something about the woman who fell in love with a wall. (I haven’t seen the programme I just heard about it). If you write it I will hold the edition of Games Perverts Play till you are done!

    (current deadline sept 15th)

    QRG
    x

    Reply

  892. Steve
    Aug 20, 2011 @ 23:57:17

    Just ordered the pdf. Sorry you got gypped out of a buck but I don’t do e-books.

    Reply

  893. JT
    Aug 21, 2011 @ 10:07:48

    Just ordered this yesterday myself. How soon can I expect the actual PDF to get to my inbox? Excited to read the stories!

    Reply

  894. Natty
    Aug 21, 2011 @ 19:38:36

    Steve – That’s what the pdf is there for, thanks so much!

    JT – I was on a camping trip this weekend but I just got back, probably sent it to you. Sorry for the delay!

    Reply

  895. Steve
    Aug 22, 2011 @ 11:49:22

    Athletic Supporter alone was worth the $3.99! How much would you charge for a second sequel to My Sister’s Boyfriend? I just reread both parts back to back and it feels like it’s missing a conclusion. I’d prefer Joey going to the bro full time but writers know their characters best…

    Reply

  896. Quiet Riot Girl
    Aug 23, 2011 @ 01:00:50

    Brilliant Natty. That was the part of the book I would have paid the cover price for, but maybe I will anyway. I love it!

    ‘Iโ€™m certainly interested in the intersection of sexual identity and behavior, but I prefer to leave those conversations to the queer theorists (who need something to talk about).’

    -Haha.

    My novella, ‘Scribbling on Foucault’s Walls’, is partly about the ‘alienation’ of having similar feelings you describe for ‘straight guys’, as a woman, but for ‘gay guys’. The thing about sex in my experience, is everyone feels they are on the wrong side of the fence sometimes, looking over at the happy people, enjoying their rightful sexual ‘identity’.

    I wonder if I could put this in ‘Paraphilia’? In Games Perverts Play. I think ‘straight chasing’is one of the classic paraphilias.

    Reply

    • Natty
      Aug 29, 2011 @ 19:57:56

      Thanks QRG! Feel free to use this in your publication, by all means!

      Reply

  897. lito
    Aug 28, 2011 @ 21:06:37

    i’m so excited! it feels like only yesterday you were starting this project!!

    Reply

  898. Dario
    Sep 01, 2011 @ 13:50:40

    Post the link of the video once they put it online. Have just been clicking through their on-demand site and couldn’t find you.

    Reply

  899. Natty
    Sep 01, 2011 @ 13:55:29

    I will, Dario. They said it should be up tomorrow or the next day.

    Reply

  900. Natty Soltesz's Blog & Gay Erotic Stories » New Story
    Sep 03, 2011 @ 11:08:15

    […] New Story 03 September 2011 | Tags: life, writing var addthis_product = 'wpp-261'; var addthis_config = {"data_track_clickback":false};I’ve been trying to write memoir. I just put a new story up here. […]

    Reply

  901. Death of The Tribe: Part One -Punk Goes Shopping « Death At the Mall
    Sep 04, 2011 @ 04:12:58

    Reply

  902. Quiet Riot Girl
    Sep 04, 2011 @ 05:51:34

    Oh great it’s going to be a good one thanks.

    I also quoted your 6 year old article in my recent piece about the death of subcultures…

    http://deathatthemall.wordpress.com/2011/09/04/death-of-the-tribe-part-one-punk-goes-shopping/

    Reply

  903. Steve
    Sep 06, 2011 @ 11:18:55

    Done!

    Reply

  904. Natty
    Sep 06, 2011 @ 12:29:10

    Thanks dude!

    Reply

  905. JT
    Sep 06, 2011 @ 22:02:31

    Ditto!

    Reply

  906. Quiet Riot Girl
    Sep 09, 2011 @ 05:34:10

    I love this. I really relate to it as well, even the bit about being young and there being ‘too much life’.

    Reply

  907. Natty
    Sep 09, 2011 @ 17:29:38

    Thanks QRG!

    Reply

  908. Georges Bataille
    Sep 10, 2011 @ 08:03:39

    This is just wonderfull…and I can totally relate to that age-thing…I never spent an adventurous youth, too, despite being bullied because of my at that time overweight body or my quietness or my overflowing fantasy and being alone most of my time.

    In the last 6 years ( I am 26 now) I went on to become young in the stereotypical sense, but alas, autumn always gives me a poetic, nice melancholy that I feel just older than most of my friends and lads.

    Really, thank you for this text and the feelings it gave to me!

    Reply

  909. lito
    Sep 10, 2011 @ 10:00:50

    LOL a very horny 80 year old! btw, i feel EXACTLY the same way. sometimes i think you read my mind and just write about what’s in there. i think it’s the danger of spending so much time in one’s mind, simultaneously guided by the heart.

    Reply

  910. Dan
    Sep 10, 2011 @ 23:49:23

    Moments like these broaden our narrow understanding of who we are.

    Reply

  911. Quiet Riot Girl
    Sep 12, 2011 @ 15:31:20

    Sorry for taking over the Below the Line here but here’s your brilliant preface at GPP:

    http://gamespervertsplay.wordpress.com/2011/09/11/paraphilia-3/

    Reply

  912. Quiet Riot Girl
    Sep 22, 2011 @ 03:41:17

    that’s the thing about fandom isn’t it? It is always contextualised and each individual experience is important. I don’t even like REM much and I am moved by your post!

    A band that broke my heart by splitting up is Ambulance Ltd. I saw them support another band when I’d never heard of them and was totally blown away. Their first album was amazing and if I listen to it I am always transported back to that gig where I first saw them. They were making a second album, produced by Scott Walker(!) and then they just broke up. I am STILL upset and it was about 5 years ago.

    Reply

  913. Quiet Riot Girl
    Sep 22, 2011 @ 04:02:40

    It’s never a good idea to try and introduce someone to a new (old) band when they are grieving for an old one, but I am going to try anyway!

    Ambulance Ltd RIP:

    Reply

    • Natty
      Sep 22, 2011 @ 05:13:35

      Jangly and melodic and dreamy – I like it!

      Reply

  914. lito
    Sep 22, 2011 @ 13:53:47

    and this is why i think you’re one of the most exciting writers of our time. u get it without being too sentimental. thank you for sharing this! fantastic!!

    Reply

  915. Natty
    Sep 22, 2011 @ 15:39:52

    Aw thanks Lito!

    Reply

  916. Natty
    Sep 22, 2011 @ 20:01:27

    Rob I expect a tour of drunken bro-ville Texas at some point in the near future.

    Reply

  917. Jak_Frost
    Sep 22, 2011 @ 23:40:23

    This performance of R.E.M. performing Swan Swan Hummingbird from their 1986 album – Life’s Rich Pageant is from the EXCELLENT music movie: ‘Athens Georgia – Inside Out’ (1987). A great documentary about the 80s Athens scene that produced, R.E.M., the B-52s, Pylon and the Bar-B-Q Killers. I saw this documentary on Much Music(Canada’s version of MTV)in 89 when they still played films about music and was obsessed with finding music by Pylon for years.
    This doc also confirmed how amazing R.E.M. is/was and their music held pride of place on my inner college mixtape. Listening to R.E.M in the company of friends, launched a million midnight conversations about art, philosophy, poetry, music, metaphor and existentialist maundering in a cloud of cigarette smoke made hazy by alcohol and the intoxication of being young and alive.
    Introverted, ambiguously definable lyrics and simple pop melodies are a great accompanying soundtrack to studying for a humanities degree. So this song will be my choice of favourite R.E.M. song.

    Reply

  918. David Kelso
    Sep 26, 2011 @ 21:44:57

    As a fan who hadn’t purchased an REM record since Adventures in HiFi, I can’t honestly say I’m awfully sad or shocked. Murmur, Fables, Out of Time and Automatic are four great albums, real classic rock with Dead Letter Office tying with Adventures for number 5 spot.
    I don’t care about bands selling out, etc. It’s harder to sell your soul than people think. It’s akin to preferring, say, early Almodovar to lush, later Almodovar with the big budgets and breathtaking camera work.
    In ’08, I saw REM for the first and only time. It was an exciting show, Stipe is nothing if not energetic as any front man I;ve ever seen. Modest Mouse w/ Johnny fuckin’ MaRR was an opening act. Marr played with Stipe and co. A rare treat.

    Reply

  919. Jak_Frost
    Oct 20, 2011 @ 21:46:15

    You’re hilarious.
    “Illegitimi non carborundum” ๐Ÿ™‚

    It’s great to see there are people everywhere who recognise what is on the line and that “we the people” have had enough. Occupy is where it starts. Even we more fortunate folk in Canada are involved in the Occupy movement.
    Real eyes, Realize, Real lies.

    One last quote from that late great homo poet laureate Allen Ginsberg-

    “America this is quite serious.
    America this is the impression I get from looking in
    the television set.
    America is this correct?
    I’d better get right down to the job.
    It’s true I don’t want to join the Army or turn lathes
    in precision parts factories, I’m nearsighted and
    psychopathic anyway.
    America I’m putting my queer shoulder to the wheel.”

    PPS – Love your work.

    Reply

  920. Natty Soltesz » Pre-Order Backwoods
    Oct 21, 2011 @ 11:03:24

    […] addthis_config = {"data_track_clickback":false};I tell ya what – you wait around for months (years?) for something to happen, then in one day everything […]

    Reply

  921. Natty
    Oct 21, 2011 @ 11:03:56

    Thanks, Jak_Frost, this made me feel good.

    Reply

  922. Quiet Riot Girl
    Oct 21, 2011 @ 13:22:30

    Congratulations Natty! That is such a great cover too.

    Reply

  923. Georges Bataille
    Oct 23, 2011 @ 07:18:41

    Finally! I a m going to to order it from one of my favorite Queer Book Stores in Germany, one copy for me, one for my partner. And I am totally with you concerning Occupy-Wall Street…Here in Germany, they have started something similar but not near as revolting as in America.

    Looking so forward to read your book, This will be the comeback of good jerk-off-fantasies like I used to have them when I was 17….fuck internet porn!!!!

    Reply

  924. Andrew
    Oct 25, 2011 @ 23:04:08

    Done! Yay!

    Reply

  925. rick
    Nov 13, 2011 @ 18:19:05

    The prospect of actually HOLDING some fresh brand-new non-electronic, erotica in my hands, or at least in one of my hands, has the priority of my undivided attention. I ordered it priority!

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